cosmiccharlie

Hello Friend, I'm sorry to hear about your struggles. I will preface this with saying that I am not a doctor. I tell everyone I encounter on this forum the same thing to help them recover: Stop all drugs (even alcohol for a bit if you can) Get as much sleep as you can Exercise regularly even if it makes your symptoms worse Eat well Stay busy with work/ school/ hobby etc Try not to worry Learn to meditate if you can (this was really helpful for me) If you're open to it, start praying to God (it doesn't have to be any particular religion just ask for help on your knees everyday. I really believe it will come if we reach out) I think in your situation it makes sense to just give it time and see what happens. One thing I am sure of is that weed usually worsens symptoms of HPPD (if you in fact have it). So maybe just take a break from the pot for a few months and see if you feel better. Another thing, try not to obsess over the situation this will only create anxiety which usually makes things worse. The internet can be an incredible resource but it can also be a rabbit hole and can drive a person crazy. Just trust that the body and mind are incredibly resilient machines and if put in the right conditions can overcome tremendous adversity; I know this from experience. Hang in there and stay positive and keep reaching out. Take Care, Nick

I had pins and needles from Lyme disease, definitely not related to psychedelics. When they did an MRI to explore whether the Lyme had affected my brain they discovered a cluster of small tumors. Thankfully they are very slow growing. I'm not sure you have tick borne illnesses where you are. Anyway, try and stay positive, you're young and I'm sure things will get better with time. If you notice HPPD like issues the advice is always the same, stop all drugs and live a healthy lifestyle. I wish you the best

it went away while I was on it

I no longer have visual snow but I still have trails, and see moving patterns on surfaces.

Hello Friend, I'm sorry to hear your difficulties. However, what you have going for you is your rather short drug history. We're all different and contract this condition for various reason with various manifestations of symptoms. For me it was excessive LSD use over a period of months which I think landed me here. I was young at the time and actually continued tripping despite the symptoms because I didn't care. Now I am older (31 years old) and still have symptoms but they are nothing like they used to be. I am happy, have a family and am currently working on a PhD in math. Life certainly does not end with this condition. I'm hopeful that with you, your symptoms will clear up completely and I'd say there's a good chance if you abstain from drugs. I tell everyone the same thing on this forum: Stop all drugs (even alcohol for a bit if you can) Get as much sleep as you can Exercise regularly even if it makes your symptoms worse Eat well Stay busy with work/ school/ hobby etc Try not to worry Meditate and mindfulness! (these were the biggest factors in coming out of the funk) Another thing that's useful to is to try and not obsess over the condition, just accept it as a temporary change in your life (maybe some good will come of it who knows). I've found that the more I focus on the problem the bigger it gets and it tends to produce anxiety which exacerbates the symptoms which creates anxiety ... Anyway, hang in there, try and have a positive attitude and you'll recover. Take Care, Nick

It is interesting. We are all different. In the beginning of medication I think I did feel some exacerbation of visual symptoms but I stuck with it because I also felt some gain in the anxiety, depressions, OCD realm. I think the flare up was short lived and once an equilibrium was reached which usually takes 8 weeks or so, maybe even longer they went back to baseline. I still have visuals today but they are much less prevalent and I have accepted that I will likely have them for the foreseeable future. This is what one gets for taking 15 hits of good LSD in one night.

Glad to help. There are many different options but basic technique is very simple. Set aside a time of day (I like the morning) and a place Seated on the ground or in a chair (whatever is comfortable) Eyes open or closed your choice (maybe closed since visuals can be distracting) Back straight posture good but not uncomfortable Set a timer (start small whatever feels reasonable maybe 2-5 minutes) For that time your only responsibility is to place your attention on the rhythm of your breath Breath normally and count your breath 1,2,1,2,1,2.... Thoughts will come (am I doing it right, my back hurts, should I have oatmeal for breakfast....) This is totally normal this is just the chatter of our mind. When they come, acknowledge them and let them go, try not to chase them. It's also very common to inadvertently chase a thought, this is totally natural but when you realize you have been thinking just acknowledge and go back to the breadth. Try to have an open mind and limit expectations TRY TO MAKE A COMMITMENT IF YOU WANT TO SEE RESULTS. I think of it as exercise, you won't notice a difference by going to the gym three or four times. You need consistency and eventually our bodies become stronger. The same is true for the mind, give it time, make it a priority if you really want to try it. Our minds are incredible machines and the thoughts can be very overwhelming but they really are not who we are. Being present in the moment, that is reality and the more we do this the more aware of our true selves we become. Recently I have been using an app called Headspace, I think it's $5 (US dollars) per month but it's certainly not necessary. There's some nice resources on there, guided meditations, meditation for anxiety reduction, meditation for creativity.... https://www.headspace.com/meditation/meditation-for-beginners Let me know if you have any questions. Remember, the basic instructions are to just pay attention to our breathing. This is a purely mechanical exercise that somehow stimulates our deeper selves (the spiritual side if you will) I wish you the best. Take Care, Nick

Hi Friend, I'm sorry to hear how much you are struggling. Unfortunately I do not have much experience with meds other than Zoloft which I have been on for about 3 years and has helped my anxiety and OCD. I don't think it's impacted my visual symptoms and they have progressively gotten better. I know it's hard to bear day in and day out but try to stay positive; you will recover. Everyone's path through recovery is different, this disorder is very strange and sometimes doesn't seem to make sense. I tell everyone the same thing which is what worked for me: Stop all drugs (even alcohol for a bit if you can) Get as much sleep as you can Exercise regularly even if it makes your symptoms worse Eat well Stay busy with work/ school/ hobby etc Try not to worry Learn to meditate if you can (this was really helpful for me) If you're open to it, start praying to God (it doesn't have to be any particular religion just ask for help on your knees everyday. I really believe it will come if we reach out) There's an old saying and it goes like this: "When you're in hell the only thing to do is keep moving". You'll get past this, stay strong and know that we're here for you. If we can recover then so can you. Take Care, Nick

Hey, I'm not sure I have directly experienced a positive impact on creativity but I'm definitely a different thinker which can be helpful in what I do. It also comes with the being a little strange as well. I hope things keep working out for you! It's all about how you interpret life, I have found having a positive attitude makes for a more pleasant experience. Take Care

Wow, I am so sorry to hear about your situation. It's interesting, on this forum (which used to be much more lively and hopefully will become so again) you're not the first person I've heard of this happening to. It definitely calls to question the safety of cannabis. Maybe you can connect with Hall89, he's new and in a similar situation. See his story below. As far as my symptoms are concerned, most of the visual distortions including visual snow went away. The exception being the acid visuals such as mildly breathing walls, swirling colors/patterns, tracers. But these became much much less pronounced as I continued to stay off drugs. To give you hope, you're talking to a guy who took 15 hits of LSD in one night who is currently a mathematics PhD student at a reputable university. I also served as a submarine office in the navy. This was all after I had contracted HPPD. I even kept tripping after I noticed the visuals were here to stay because I was in a bad place and didn't care about myself. You can have an amazing life with this condition. Let me tell you, coming out on the other side is absolutely amazing. You will have a new lease on life and your brain will come back. Remember, the human brain is extraordinarily resilient and will adapt to the condition you have put it in if given the time and a healthy lifestyle. I recommend trying not to feel guilty, you are not at fault, you made a mistake and will learn and grow from it. Keep reaching out and stay positive.

I think it really depends upon the dosage taken, the specific drugs used, the frequency of use and probably the most important factor is the individual. I have had symptoms diminish over time, the exact amount of time I don't really recall because it is a gradual process. For me, I do think I am stuck with a baseline amount of visuals but emotionally and cognitively I have made a full recovery in the past. Currently I hit a bump in the road in the form of a weed trial for emotional relief which has caused them to flare up a bit. But I am in the category of high dose and frequent LSD users which seem to be the most likely to have them for life. As most people say on here, try not to worry or obsess over your condition. If you stay healthy things will get better which for me means: Stop all drugs (even alcohol for a but if you can) Get as much sleep as you can Exercise regularly even if it makes your symptoms worse Eat well Stay busy with work/ school/ hobby etc Try not to worry Learn to meditate if you can This was what helped me through those first few weeks/months. Stay positive and you will recover! Take Care, Nick

The brain fog definitely cleared for me after some time. I'm convinced it was from anxiety. Just hang in there and try to be positive, do everything you can to keep your brain healthy ie: exercise, sleep and eat well, and meditate. You're going to be fine.

Thank you Garris, I really appreciate your input and sharing your experience. Life is a long and winding road, the more we help each other the better it is. Take care my friend.

Hey everyone, I thought i would provide an update. Since starting the experiment, I have ingested a low dose edible on three occasions. First 2.5mg THC, second 6mg, third 6mg. Each spaced about 1 week apart. I think my body is telling me to stop as the visuals have intensified (I think) and there is a little DR/DP. I'm not sure this was a very intelligent decision but at the time I felt desperate for some type of relief. I think I am going to go back to full sobriety. If anyone has any questions about what happened and the experiences I am willing to chat about them. I am also wondering if anyone has done what I have done; more or less emotionally recovered from HPPD and tried some THC with a relapse of visuals. I am very nervous about how long I should expect this bump in the road to last. Crazy year, I am a math PhD student with a baby and a wonderful wife with another baby on the way. Hindsight is always 2020 but I could use some encouragement right now to help me make it through this period. I don't know why I felt such a strong pull back to what has harmed me, I'm not stupid but maybe insane. Thankfully I do not feel the need to continue with this as I have in the past digging a deeper hole of despair. I love you guys and with you the best, Nick Remember: We are all loving awareness.

Hello, I will preface this with the fact that this is about harm reduction, I am in no way encouraging you to continue using psychedelics. I first contracted HPPD as an 18 year old or so from extensive and excessive use of LSD and mushrooms and probably weed. I actually continued tripping while noticing the symptoms and didn't fully stop until I had a bit of a psychotic break and went to the hospital on acid (not fun). I then abstained for about a year or so after which I had a fairly intense mushroom trip. For me I don't think much changed as far as symptoms go. However, I believe my HPPD was brought on by a high frequency of tripping. In this case I tripped only once. Fast forward several years (I think about 7) to when I was dealing with significant life changes and emotional difficulties. This eventually led me to tripping again. The difference this time is I tripped about 7 times in 7 weeks. Unfortunately this brought back the visuals and DR/DP in a pretty bad way. I then got sober and have maintained complete sobriety for about 2.5 years until recently (about 3 weeks ago) I consumed an edible which has possibly exacerbated symptoms. What I would like you take away from this is the following: We are all different and what works for some may not for others. I would evaluate how much HPPD has affected your life and answer the question whether you are willing to take the chance and make it worse. The disorder can be debilitating and emotional hell after a certain point, so one needs to be ready to face those consequences. Also, ask yourself and evaluate what you are really searching for through the shrooms and whether you can get it elsewhere. Personally, I believe psychedelics can be very helpful for spiritual and personal growth if used responsibly. For me, I have found that everything psychedelics gave me can be reached without them through the practice of meditation and mindfulness. I wish you the best. Take Care, Nick

Hello, I'm sorry to hear how much you're struggling. I myself contracted HPPD from excessive LSD and mushroom use. You're still very early in your recovery, I know it might not seem like it but your best friend will be time. Also, you very young with a short history of drug use so I would say your chances of full recovery are pretty high. I tell everyone the same thing: Stop all drugs (even alcohol for a but if you can) Get as much sleep as you can Exercise regularly even if it makes your symptoms worse Eat well Stay busy with work/ school/ hobby etc Try not to worry For me, the above recipe over time helped me settle into normal life (in fact multiple times) and my symptoms over time are much much better. Right now I am a mathematics PhD student with a family, I also served in the US Navy as a submarine office. As a kid I took excessively large amounts of acid and various other drugs and was able to recover.; my largest dose of LSD was about 15 hits. Now this is behind me and I can move ahead without regretting the past. You'll see as you get older that the mind is an incredibly resillient machine and will adapt to whatever conditions it is placed in. You made a mistake but that's okay you'll learn from it and you're already ahead of me; I kept dosing even when the symptoms emerged because I didn't care. Life is precious and when you emerge on the other side of this hurdle you will truly appreciate it. Just take it a day at a time and believe that you can recover. I wish you the best and please keep reaching out for support, it really helped me in the beginning. Take Care, Nick

Hi Oms, I'm sorry to hear about what you're going through. I personally do not have any experience with Epstein but for anti-inflammatory my go to is curcumin or tumeric. It's definitely safe, and it's been shown to cross the blood brain barrier and has a whole list of benefits. You an consume by either supplement or directly from the root. My wife is Indian and her mother always makes a drink on the stove containing tumeric, ginger and black pepper corns when we're feeling ill. The recipe is very simple; cut up about 2-3cm of tumeric root, and 1-2cm of ginger root, place in a small pot of boiling water along with the black pepper (she usually uses whole pepper corns) then let it simmer for some time. Of course you can add whatever you want, honey is good addition, your favorite tea etc. I wish you the best. Take Care, Nick

Mine were mostly pulsating surfaces, swirling patterns, afterimages and DR/DP. It's a shitty condition but it gets better over time, just stay sober and body/mind will heal.

The blurry vision and visual snow did go away completely both times. The effects that lingered then and I still experience now are moving surfaces, swirling patterns etc. This is likely an artifact of LSD. Yes, the anxiety can be debilitating, sometimes I think this disorder is primarily centered around anxiety. I have distortions which produce anxiety which make the distortions worse which makes the anxiety worse etc... I think the brain fog is also from anxiety, anxiety produces cortisol which hinders cognition. Just try and occupy your time somehow, I played lots of chess and exercised a lot. Eventually things get better.

No problem, I'm happy to help someone struggling with this; there were several notable people who helped me through and you can help someone when you recover too. My story goes back 13 years ago when I was 18. I developed a love for psychedelics and became totally enthralled with them to the point that one night I ate 15 hits of good LSD. For a period of about 1 year, I consistently consumed hallucinogens on a weekly basis eventually settling on mushrooms as my preferred door. I think I realized I had visuals that weren't going away about 7 months into it but I kept dosing. Eventually lots of things happened and I decided to stop 2010. Eventually I felt normal again. It's impossible to say how long it took because it's gradual then one day you realize things are less strange. Since then, I graduated undergrad with honors and a degree in math, did 5 years in the US Navy as a submarine officer and now I am a 3rd year mathematics PhD student at a reputable university in the United States. Unfortunately, after I got out of the Navy I was sort of lost and ended up going back to weed which led me to several mushroom trips that brought the HPPD back. This was almost exactly 3 years ago. For me, after that romp the DR/DP came back to life and I had pretty severe afterimages and trails. I still have some symptoms but they are extremely mind, I actually sort of enjoy the visuals now. My head is clear and I am happy. The point I would like to drive home is that we are all different; personality wise and physically. Some people can tolerate hallucinogens/psychedelics beautifully and use them responsibly with little consequence. Since you appear to be so sensitive to weed I would take that as a sign to stay away from these substances all together. They are powerful, and I do believe can actually help people if used correctly. Unfortunately there appears to be a class of people who can just not tolerate them for whatever reason. For you, take solace that you had a fairly low exposure to drugs so that probably means you'll make a complete recovery. How long will that take? No one can say, just let your body and mind do their thing and try not to worry. You will be fine. Just give it time, have hope and never give up. Take Care, Nick

I understand man, I will say that for me even though it may seem like it did, HPPD had zero effect on my intelligence. I will tell you (not to worry you) but benzos do come with a warning of long-term side-effects to include addiction and they're not great for the brain... Just keep those in mind. I do also highly recommend trying to incorporate meditation into your life. It really helped me with intrusive thoughts, anxiety and overall well being. Plus it's been shown to be good for your brain! If you want to talk about getting started with meditation that let me know. Take care Nick

Hello, I'm sorry to hear that you are struggling with this disorder. I am not a doctor but I have been on an SSRI for years and had very good success with remission of symptoms. To me, what makes sense is for you to not change anything and just give it time (again I am not a doctor). I tell everyone the same simple advice that worked for me early on: Stop all drugs (even alcohol for a but if you can) Get as much sleep as you can Exercise regularly even if it makes your symptoms worse Eat well Stay busy with work/ school/ hobby etc Try not to worry Anxiety will typically exacerbate symptoms so try and minimize this if you can, take a walk, learn to meditate, do something you enjoy. You don't have brain damage, you can recover. I am a 3rd year mathematics PhD student and doing well and I have a long history of psychedelic abuse. If I can recover you can too! Hang in there buddy and keep reaching out but don't let HPPD dominate your thinking. Take Care, Nick

Hello, I'm sorry to hear how much you're struggling. I myself contracted HPPD from excessive LSD and mushroom use but from what I have heard there are many cases of people recovering from MDMA use as well. You're still very early in your recovery, I know it might not seem like it but your best friend will be time. Also, you very young with a short history of drug use so I would say your chances of full recovery are pretty high. I tell everyone the same thing: Stop all drugs (even alcohol for a but if you can) Get as much sleep as you can Exercise regularly even if it makes your symptoms worse Eat well Stay busy with work/ school/ hobby etc Try not to worry For me, the above recipe over time helped me settle into normal life (in fact multiple times) and my symptoms over time are much much better. Right now I am a mathematics PhD student with a family, I also served in the US Navy as a submarine office. As a kid I took excessively large amounts of acid and various other drugs and was able to recover.; my largest dose of LSD was about 15 hits. Now this is behind me and I can move ahead without regretting the past. You'll see as you get older that the mind is an incredibly resillient machine and will adapt to whatever conditions it is placed in. You made a mistake but that's okay you'll learn from it and you're already ahead of me; I kept dosing even when the symptoms emerged because I didn't care. Life is precious and when you emerge on the other side of this hurdle you will truly appreciate it. Just take it a day at a time and believe that you can recover. I wish you the best and please keep reaching out for support, it really helped me in the beginning. Take Care, Nick

Nice to meet you Garris, my name is Nick. Welcome to the forum and thank you for replying to my earlier post, I appreciate your input. You will find many experienced, honest and kind people on this forum and we look forward to getting to know you. Take Care!

Hang in there man. Try and not focus on it (I know it's easier said than done). Keep yourself busy with productive healthy things such as exercise, any hobby, and try to relax. Many people recover it usually just takes some time (the exact amount is different for everyone). Unfortunately you can find yourself in a feedback cycle where the disturbance creates anxiety, and then anxiety exacerbates the symptoms which creates anxiety etc... Many people on here have felt totally helpless at one point (myself included) you just have hope that your mind will recover. You'll discover that the mind is an extraordinarily resilient machine, just let it do the work; consciously focussing on the symptoms will only make them worse. My advice is as always: -Stop all drugs and alcohol (at least for a few months, which it seems you have) -Get plenty of sleep -Try and minimize obsessing over the symptoms -Eat healthy -Get as much exercise as you can (even if it exacerbates the symptoms) -Try and be as hopeful and positive as you can Also, take solace in the fact that your drug use history is pretty minor which means you will probably make a full recovery. Take care and keep on keeping on!