cosmiccharlie

Welcome back! You were and still are big part of my journey which started a few years ago. I am happy to report that I am loving life again with two healthy daughters!

I've had a spinal tap since having HPPD, it didn't have any meaningful affect on my condition. I wish you the best! My wife and I recently had our second child. Children are a joy. ,

I personally think we should limit our advice on this forum to our own experience not about what we've read. None of us ( I assume) are doctors.

Please don't tell people to stay away from antidepressants. They have been a huge help for me and could help someone else.

Hello, I'm sorry you're struggling so much. From your story it seems like you have a tendency to impulsively take drugs. I had similar behavior when I was your age (I am now 32). This led me to eat 15 hits of good LSD in one night when I was 18. For me, recovery came in stages. I first had to realize that if I continued with the way I was my life wouldn't amount to much plus my sanity would likely be demolished. I had some warning signs that my mind wasn't tolerating psychedelics well anymore such as panic attacks, visual distortions and DR/DP. These scared me enough to take a long break from tripping. I advise you to consider stopping hard drugs for a while. Weed as you said can make things worse but like I said, recovery can come in stages. I continued to smoke weed after I stopped and after a few months most of the HPPD symptoms dramatically subsided. You are young and have a chance to recover but don't wait until things get worse! Try not to focus on any mistakes just remember that stopping drugs is probably the best thing you can do right now. Keep reaching out to us and stay positive. If I can get better then so can you.

Have you tried antidepressants? I have had a great deal of success on SSRIs. In general, there is no one size fits all remedy for improving mental health. Yes, psychedelics can be useful in the right setting, right dose, right person but there are risks. HPPD being one of them. I have to echo Jay's sentiments and add that for me, being honest with the doctor, staying sober and living the most healthy existence I can has lead to stability. I tell everyone the same thing which worked for me Exercise as much as you can, even if your symptoms get worse. Eat healthy and balanced meals. Sleep as much as possible. Limit caffeine intake. Stop all drugs including alcohol and especially weed (at least until things get better) Try not worry, stay busy to distract your mind with things such as work/school, hobbies and exercise. Learn to meditate and if you are open to it, ask God to help you. You don't even have to believe in anything, I did not and it helped me. With the addition of SSRIs, this combo has enabled me to weather some difficult storms in my life. Psychedelics have helped in the past (for me) but once HPPD set in they tended to only make matters worse. The fact that you developed DR/DP from weed is a red flag that you may be sensitive to psychedelics. Hang in there, we're here for you. Take Care, Nick

Hello, I'm sorry to hear about your struggles. For me, meditation and maintaining a physically and mentally active lifestyle helped in my recovery. Time is usually the best antidote for HPPD and doing everything you can to minimize anxiety. For me there were dark days but there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I will tell you the feeling of getting back to an acceptable level of normal is truly wonderful, you will experience this. I tell everyone who is struggling with this disorder the same thing: Maximize your chances of recovery by placing your body in the best condition to do so. Exercise as much as you can, even if your symptoms get worse. Eat healthy and balanced meals. Sleep as much as possible. Limit caffeine intake. Stop all drugs including alcohol and especially weed (at least until things get better) Try not worry, stay busy to distract your mind with things such as work/school or hobbies. Learn to meditate and if you are open to it, ask God to help you. You don't even have to believe in anything, I did not and it helped me. You will be okay, hang in there. Below you will find a meditation app that I like. https://apps.apple.com/us/app/headspace-meditation-sleep/id493145008 Take Care, Nick

Hello, I am sorry to hear how much you are struggling. I have a few thoughts. First, where there is life there is always hope. I firmly believe this and also empathize with the fact that in the pit of despair, this might be difficult to believe. Next, I would highly discourage you from taking any additional psychedelic drugs. At least until you have a handle on your mental state and some stability is achieved. I know the wishful thinking of what one experience created can be extinguished by another such experience. This may be true but it has its risks. I am a firm believer in the healing power of psychedelics however, there is a population of people who have suffered very negative consequences as a result of them. You may be sensitive and susceptible to their dark side. Did you coordinate with your doctor to stop taking Solian? Did you taper properly etc... These types of drugs can strongly affect the mind and emotional stability especially if ended abruptly. I highly encourage you to discuss this with your doctor. Your best allies in the coming months will be time and learning to cope with anxiety. I tell everyone who is struggling with this disorder the same thing: Maximize your chances of recovery by placing your body in the best condition to do so. Exercise as much as you can, even if your symptoms get worse. Eat healthy and balanced meals. Sleep as much as possible. Limit caffeine intake. Stop all drugs including alcohol and especially weed (at least until things get better) Try not worry, stay busy to distract your mind with things such as work/school or hobbies. Learn to meditate and if you are open to it, ask God to help you. You don't even have to believe in anything, I did not and it helped me. You will be okay, hang in there. Below you will find a meditation app that I like. https://apps.apple.com/us/app/headspace-meditation-sleep/id493145008 Take Care, Nick l

I'm not sure what to call it, however it may be useful for you to talk to a doctor about this. It could be some kind of panic attack. Unfortunately there is really no direct treatment for HPPD, however there are treatments to help with anxiety which directly affects HPPD. On the subject of meditation, I think it's important to maintain consistency to really see results. Start out small (1-5 minutes) but keep it up daily and in a few weeks you'll start seeing subtle changes in your thinking which can become major if you stick with it. Hang in there, you'll be fine.

Hello, I'm sorry to hear about what you're going through. The best advice I can give is to keep doing what you're doing. You've made it through with this disorder before and it can manifest itself in very strange ways indeed. For me, staying physically and mentally active and sober were key to the progress I have made. Meditation is something that has been a big help in my recovery as well as spiritual and intellectual growth. I will attach a recommendation for an App that I have found useful. Hang in there, day by day you will get better. Take Care, Nick https://apps.apple.com/us/app/headspace-meditation-sleep/id493145008

Thanks Jay. As always I value your opinion and advice. I will keep you guys posted about this, although if it's successful I hesitate to share that information for fear of it backfiring for someone else. I have smoked weed many times post HPPD with some drawbacks but for me, it never produced lasting crazy results. I have found sometimes regressing back to being a pot head for a few weeks can actually be beneficial for my mental health. However, it has been a number of years since such an experience. Who knows, I'm just trying to get by and be reasonably happy. I wish you the best.

Hello Everyone, I hope you are all doing well. About 7 months ago I was going through some difficult emotional times and got prescribed medical marijuana for a condition that I have. I tried 4 edible attempts over 1 month and did notice an uptick in my visual disturbances and some anxiety. After the last attempt I decided to leave the gummies be and I have since been sober from everything and am again going through some difficult stressful things. All positive but very exhausting; my wife and I just had our second daughter and I am on my 4th year of mathematics PhD studies. The idea of smoking cannabis is now very appealing and I was wondering if anyone had experience with positive responses from smoking but negative from edibles. I don't think the steps back that I took with the edibles were very significant, however the possibility of making things far worse scares me. Also, I am a member of Alcoholics Anonymous and most of the feedback I get from them makes it seem like I am putting a gun to my head if I even think about smoking weed. I love AA but they can be a bit much sometimes. Anyway, thanks as always for your your input. Take Care, Nick

For me, I have been on an SSRI for over 3 years and classify it as a success. Other people report that it exacerbates their symptoms but I have not found this to be true. I would follow the advice of your doctor especially with something like this. Be honest with them, mention your apprehension about the need for an SSRI and why.

I can relate to the suicidal ideas myself, thankfully I have gotten through those rough times. Please DM me if you'd like to talk in a less public setting. You're young and have only done acid once which will work in your favor. Also, I know that it might not seem like it but 2 months isn't very long for a recovery. For me 6 months seemed to bring about real change. It's subtle, but overtime you'll see improvement. Try not to worry and believe that you will get better. Hang in there

I understand your frustration and I'm sorry to hear how difficult things are for you. I have a few basic questions: How old are you? How often and how much did you dose? When was your last trip? Do you smoke weed? These factors will affect your recovery time as well as your chances of making a full recovery. The weed can keep you in the same headspace for extended periods and also bring it back. Try not to focus on the condition, it will get better you just need to let your mind heal. I like to use the analogy of letting your body get over a cold or another ailment: do you obsess over your recovery, your cough, the way you feel? No, you just do what you can to get better and let your body do the work. You will heal it just takes time and the right conditions. I tell everyone to try a simple regiment: Stop all drugs (especially weed, even alcohol for a bit if you can) Get as much sleep as you can Exercise regularly even if it makes your symptoms worse Eat well Stay busy with work/ school/ hobby etc Try not to worry Learn to meditate if you can (this was really helpful for me) If you're open to it, start praying to God (it doesn't have to be any particular religion just ask for help on your knees everyday you don't even have to believe in anything. For me, eventually I was willing to try anything. I really believe strength to carry on will come if we reach out) Think about how good it's going to feel when you recover, I cannot tell you how much you appreciate the simple things in life. Hang in there! Nick

Welcome to the forum! I wish we could meet under more pleasant circumstances but here we are. You are indeed very young and I think that will work in your favor. For me, I also contracted HPPD about 14 years ago from excessive and frequent LSD use. It does get better! But your recovery depends upon you. More drugs will almost always make the condition worse. For me, sobriety, time and a healthy lifestyle got me back on my feet. What do I mean by sobriety? Well, weed always exacerbates my symptoms as well as drinking so I stay away from those things. Even years later, I tried a small amount of weed a few time to take the edge off and it brought my symptoms back. But they receded over time. The best advice I can give you is find a hobby, something that challenges you and is satisfying and throw yourself into it. If you are in school, focus on your studies too. Exercise always helps me with anxiety and mental funk plus plenty of sleep and a good diet. You'll be fine just stay away from drugs for at least a while to let your mind recover. Life is not over, I myself have accomplished a lot after contracting this HPPD business: I served on a nuclear submarine, I am a PhD student in math and I have a healthy marriage with one amazing daughter and another on the way. Stay positive and put one foot in front of the other and before you know it you'll feel like yourself again. This is a great forum for when you feel hopeless or have questions but try not to obsess over the condition; this typically makes it worse. Let your mind heal and you'll get your life back.

Hello, You sound like you're in a tough place, I'm sorry to hear that. This is a difficult disorder and everyones experience is a little different. I tell everyone the same thing: Stop all drugs (even alcohol for a bit if you can) Get as much sleep as you can Exercise regularly even if it makes your symptoms worse Eat well Stay busy with work/ school/ hobby etc Try not to worry Learn to meditate if you can (this was really helpful for me) If you're open to it, start praying to God (it doesn't have to be any particular religion and you don't even have to believe in anything just ask for help on your knees everyday. I really believe help will come if we reach out) I take it a day at a time, sometimes an hour at a time. The emotional turmoil can be disturbing and debilitating. However, you are on a good path. Stay off drugs and your mind will have a chance to recover. My advice to you is put your body and mind in the best possible conditions by living a healthy, mindful lifestyle. Stay strong and stay positive. Take Care, Nick

lol, how old did you think I was? how old are you?

Hi, I have made the mistake of tripping on mushrooms and smoking DMT plus periods of heavy weed use after developing HPPD. For me, the weed always brings it back and when I get off of it, the symptoms usually recede within a few months. Everyone's different, mine is primarily from heavy LSD use when I was 18-20. I am now 32 and still have fairly strong visuals. My advice is to really evaluate why you want to still use drugs and also appreciate that if you contracted HPPD from one time acid use, you are probably sensitive to this condition. I contracted it from heavy doses upwards of 10 hits of good acid on multiple occasions. The disorder can be debilitating so it really is best not to tempt fate. For me, I had to get burned enough times until I learned how to be happy without drugs or alcohol. It's not to say that I don't sometimes miss being high or drunk but it's become a matter of overall gain. My life is better this way so I choose to live this way. I hope this helps. Take Care, Nick

Response to weed was probably my first; I started noticing that when I would smoke I would get fairly intense visuals. Also, when I would feel anxious sometimes while sober they would come.

Hey man, Hang in there, things will get better. I do not have any direct experience with what you're talking about but I do know sobriety and it can be hard. For me, it's what enabled my brain to heal and it takes time. Try not to focus on the day to day just let your body do the work and then you can reap the result!

Hello, Unfortunately I don't think we will have a definitive answer to the question you are asking for some time. From my perspective, I personally would wait until more can be said about the potential risks. Any understanding of HPPD and the interaction of psychedelics and humans is really in its infant stage (if you can even call it that). For me, my HPPD is from closely spaced high dose LSD trips so I can't really offer much advise on microdosing other than I have done it with mushrooms but at the time I was also tripping pretty frequently. In order to deal with my OCD, depression and GAD I use SSRIs combined with cognitive behavioral therapy, regular exercise, meditation and complete sobriety. This combination has worked for several years with the exception of a brief period of marijuana use a few months ago. I have found stability, productivity and genuine happiness on average with the above. For me, pot always causes the visuals and other issues to flare up. Knowing you have HPPD when symptoms are subtle is a tricky business. Maybe they'll never change and you can smoke and microdose until you feel better, but maybe you can't. I will say this though, for me I wish I had used more caution than I had, however my use was during a self destructive period. Now I have to resign to the fact that the distortions will probably never go away. But hey, I'm currently getting my PhD in math, I have a child and another on the way and am happily married. Life is not over, we can always adapt. For me I had to choose between getting 'high and finding the solution' and what brings me the most joy. It's a simple choice but it's difficult to make, especially for an addict. I wish you the best, let us know how things go. Take Care, Nick

really interesting, I enjoyed reading this.

Hello, For me staying sober and meditation have been the biggest contributors to my recovery. It takes time and patience. I am not sure about the ritalin but I have been on Sertraline for 3 years with good success. Some people say it affects their symptoms but I only found this to be true in the beginning. I tell everyone the same thing because it worked for me Stop all drugs (including weed for a while but not prescribed medication) (even alcohol for a bit if you can) Get as much sleep as you can Exercise regularly even if it makes your symptoms worse Eat well Stay busy with work/ school/ hobby etc Try not to worry Learn to meditate if you can (this was really helpful for me) If you're open to it, start praying to God (it doesn't have to be any particular religion just ask for help on your knees everyday you don't even have to believe in anything. For me, eventually I was willing to try anything. I really believe strength to carry on will come if we reach out) Also, are the drugs you are trying coming from a doctor? If not I would recommend working with one and being honest with them. Eventually I realized that if I didn't get serious about cutting drugs out of my life I would never reach my potential and probably wouldn't find long term happiness. In sobriety I have found happiness and am working towards my potential. Tripping provided me with insight into myself, the world and the spiritual side of us. However, eventually I was just abusing it and it the magic went away and the HPPD set in. You sound like you have some soul searching to do. Being honest with yourself and your situation is important to to get past this bump in the road. I wish you the best, keep reaching out Nick

I've tried it, I felt a slight positive effect on my cognition and sleep quality (very vivid dreams). However, I have also read that one builds a tolerance and you can actually undergo withdrawal symptoms when you discontinue so I stopped after about one week. Everyone's different though. I also didn't notice any impact on HPPD