Jay1

It was not a major cure or anything, but i noticed maybe a 20% reduction in VS and just felt generally more clear headed and less messed up. I really want to try it again, as I think I jumped the gun on the rash.... Now I am in the UK though, meds are much harder to come by

I think Lamictal actually has more potential for hppd. I think I got up to 100mg a day before I tapered off after getting a rash. From what I remember, drinking, smoking and benzos were ok... but check with your doc.

That's really interesting, Larry. We are so quick to scoff at non western treatments, but if we step back.. western medicine is basically a huge money making machine and we are conditioned to think it is perfect, when it is often far from perfect.... There must be something in these traditional methods. Has anyone ever done any acupuncture or similar?

When i use to do lsd/shrooms... my (mild) hppd was purple... When I moved onto mdma, my hppd went blue/green. It has been blue/green for most of my illness.

Glad to hear you are safe, was very worried for you. It sounds like you are ready to make a big change and I think that could be a great thing, sometimes totally changing your life is a good way to feel in control of it. As much as this idea might be a scary one, have you thought about tapering down from Clonazepam? I think it does some very scary things in terms of depression... Even when I take it for just 2 weeks, I feel very, very depressed and empty. Anyway, I hope you can look back on this period in your life and think "That was something that changed my life for the better". Good things can come from bad places. All the best, Jay

I tried it, didn't really do anything, even at a strong dose. I know Merkan had a very bad reaction though, so be careful with this.

I would try the other plants mentioned first. Loads of our western drugs/meds originate from plants found in the jungles, who knows what they have that could help.

always goes a bit quieter through the summer....

Every decision you make over the next 3 months (your best chance of a full recovery) is vital. I know it is hard, but you will just have to say to your friends you can't drink or do drugs. Even if you have to lie and make up some shitty excuse... Just find a way. I made every mistake possible when I first got hppd and i'm here, 19 years on, still tripping every day. Is that night of drinking or smoking worth such a huge risk?

sorry to hear this, my friend.... If you need any support that I can give, just let me know. keep up the fight

I can't and that is 19 years on.... but you might get lucky. I would leave it alone for a few months though. It will do nothing good for your recovery, at this point. Maybe after that period, your brain will have sorted itself out and you will be able to enjoy smoking again.... Just never any hallucinogens or MDMA etc

also, check this: http://hppdonline.com/index.php?/topic/745-general-advice/

My advice is the same as always.... for the next 3 months, stay completely sober, eat healthy, exercise, try to remove anything that stresses you out (even if it means leaving a job or school for a while). Don't bother with meds yet, they will stick you on an SSRI and it will make you worse. Flat out refuse it, if they offer. Based on the amount of people that come and go here, I would say the success rate of people who get this early and try to follow the above advice is pretty big. All the best, Jay

I imagine that alot of people who get benefits from this might actually just be getting the benefits of broadening their horizon, travelling, meeting new people and embracing new cultures. I would actually try that long, long before I tried the plant. I moved to Portugal when I was about 8 years into my hppd and it was a real benefit. Changing your life can have a real impact and if you are feeling the urge to go on an adventure, just do it. Please note that although I have thought about the same thing a few times, it would really be a last ditch attempt at some peace of mind. I would be very interested to hear what a shaman has to say though.

don't give up on the post too quickly... Things are slow around here, probably due to it being summer, but it is an interesting topic and one that has come up a few times. it is something I have pondered upon a few times. Maybe in a very spiritual setting, some kind of acceptance and healing could be gained. I don't think it would ever cure hppd, and could make things far worse.... But, perhaps for those of us that seem to have hit our hppd limit, it is possible that it could actually have some beneficial power. if you want me to still delete this topic, please pm me.

It happens to me a lot.... After around 5-10 seconds watching tv, the peripheral vision sort of flattens and goes to nothing (but flashes about 5-6 times a second). Nowadays I have trained myself to slightly move my eyes as I am watching, this puts an end to the tunnel vision effect. The strangest is when it happens when I am looking at my cat, after about 20 seconds all I can see is the cat's head appearing to float in the flashing emptiness!

I do tDCS. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transcranial_direct-current_stimulation I have heard alot of very good reports of it helping depression. I have been trying to use it for anxiety, but with no success, but I did start using the well known placements for concentration and learning and it works, it really works. I use it now to learn really advanced bass guitar techniques and I learn it all so quickly.

Hi, welcome back... I remember you as Benza on the old forum. Glad to hear that you got off clonamzepam, was it a struggle? Best regards, Jay

Yea, it's a bug of the site... I have messaged the site owner about it, but he is a very busy guy. If anyone knows about web dev, maybe they can help out?

I agree 100% on that. Your body is very good at giving you warning signs and big huge fucking red alerts. I got a warning sign after a few goes on the LSD and ignored it, so my body hit me with the big one. Now even a whiff of weed makes me trip like crazy and swear never to touch it again. It's a good mechanism. Hellish to us, but in the grand scheme of things, makes total sense.

I don't have it full on, like, say, 3 hours into an acid trip.... More like 7-8 hours into the trip... where you are between normal and tripping, without any of the joy and wonder. Someone once said that was the best part of the trip, as the relief that it was over made them immensely happy.... But when you know it will never be over, that relief turns to anxiety. That's the best way I can ever really describe my symptoms

For me, tripping means being on a hallucinogen. I don't connect it to any other drug or experience... People have taken the word into mainstream language... But, for me at least, it is purely associated with hallucinogens. If I had to break that mindset down, it would be 3 part Sensory - all the usual visual suspects, plus auditory hallucinations DP/DR - The disconnect from reality you mention, including the expansion/contraction of time. Thought process - Looking into every corner of your mind. Sub concious thoughts bubbling to the surface.

well... me personally... I don't really buy into the idea of hppd being a singular problem.... The way I see it, I have numerous post-drug issues that all feed into one another. I label it hppd as that is easier... I don't imagine I am alone there. VS, tracers, after images, depression (gone), anxiety, dp/dr (triply feeling), pain and maybe some kind of mania/bi-polar I can't remember the exact definition of what hppd is... Maybe it is just the visual side of it... DP/DR is maybe the thing that people here suffer from most though... It certainly is for me... I could live with the visuals, no probs.... I'd even trade in my eyesight for the triply feeling to go.

I'd love to hear details of the qEEG. I am still experimenting with T-DCS and knowing which parts of the brain are over/under stimulated would be very helpful.

Lamictal helped me a little bit, but was not really a magic bullet... Maybe a 10-20% reduction in symptoms while I was on it.... (I stopped because I got a rash, research the side effects... It is quite scary)