Jay1

Most myths are born out of some kind of reality, I guess. Another myth I remember was that if you watched pink floyd's The Wall.. While triping... You would go into a perma bad trip

Visual.... The main myth was the "permatrip" where the user never came down.... Similar to HPPD really. Then there was a myth about someone ingesting 30000 trips while trying to smuggle them.... And being in a permatrip thinking he was an orange

On the original topic... I would hate to trip with the idea of hppd on my mind. For better or for worse... I took lsd before the internet was around and didn't know much about what lsd could do (with the exception of a few urban myths). The idea of tripping and panicking about whether you might get hppd would be a nightmare, especially if you fell into a bad trip.

Snuffo.... VS is about the least of my concerns.... HPPD is far more than just VS. I can't imagine that a VS sufferer feels like they are tripping every day of their lives.

I echo that.... you're not alone, and like i said, I appreciate you trying to find positives.... I made a similar article on the old forum where I mentioned that if I hadn't got hppd, I would have probably ended up a heroin addict like all of my drug buddies at the time. I was also an arrogant little shit who got in a lot of fights, treated women like shit etc.... Hppd kicked my ass for me and made me a better person, in some respects. Stay positive, keep posting... But I hope that you can understand that some of us here are suffering on a different level to you, and that you can perhaps keep that in mind when writing articles.

I missed this line on first read and must say that I find it uncomfortable that you fail to grasp how severe these problems can be. Would you go onto a cancer forum and say you would rather not have "boring" healthy lungs?

I appreciate you trying to find positives.... But it is really hard for me to find anything positive about the visual distortions... Mine are so bad that I can't drive.... I can't see anything but blue/green movement in my peripheral vision... I can't take pleasure in reading due to the words moving around. I can't watch a movie for more than a few minutes before my vision warps into a tunnel of flashing colours. The positives I do get are more in terms of the life choices I have been forced into. My body is very health due to my diet and exercise. My love for nature has intensified due to my need to get away from it all. My empathy with others is strong, because I know what suffering is all about.

No, you can't. You can have visual abnormalities without drugs, but not HPPD.

Are you looking to taper down and stop, if so, i hear switching to Valium makes it easier. If you want to move meds though, i don't think swapping one benzo for another makes alot of difference. Your tolerance will be too high. Better to speak to your doctor about this stuff though.

I just had a look through your posting history to make sure no one was bullying, I don't see anything? Do you mean the old forum perhaps? The data from that forum was tragically lost a couple of years ago.

Hi, not sure what happened last time you visited but it doesn't sound like you encountered the usual people on here. Most people are very welcoming and interested in hearing how people cope. Especially us long termers. There are several people here in their late 30s, 40s and 50s+ that get no problems with ageism. Same with the numerous women that have used the forum, i've never seen anything but respect for them for joining.

Drinking kills me the next day (without klono) but makes me feel alive on the night itself.... I've calmed down a lot these days though... Just a few beers here and there

I don't think any question should be out of bounds on here..... We are all here because the allure of drugs was strong and I'm sure that more than a small minority of us are still fascinated by the idea of taking more. Now, the overwhelming response will always be a huge NO.... It makes sense, we are also here because we are ill because of drugs. But taking drugs post-hppd is not a simple yes or no. It should be, but it isn't. We all have moments of weakness, maybe a few too many beers, or the right party with the right people. A line is put in front of you and bang, you've just snorted it up without consequence. I've been guilty of taking lsd, MDMA, coke, opiates, salvia, ketamine and various other thing, post-hppd (not to mention my favourite friend, the brandy bottle).... Not because I am stupid (open to debate), but weak. I don't beat myself up though. Shit happens. Anyway, of all the things I have taken, post hppd... The one that has little affect on my illness is coke... that is not a reason to go and do it, you might be very different to me, it could send you over the edge or could be cut with anything. The drug that made me a lot worse, post hppd... MDMA, pure evil for us. Stay away at all costs.

You're welcome here and you will find some good people on the board. I think the title of your article could be worded a little better though. That, coupled with a long article that people will naturally skim read, will lead them to summarise that hppd is almost a trick of the mind that can be ignored. It's a bit like telling someone with depression to snap out of it.... It is too simplistic and doesn't take into account the varying levels of the illness. That said, I am in agreement that certain parts of our illness can be diminshed with positive thinking, putting the self blame/loathing behind us and saying a big f*** you to those anxiety loops that will try and amplify the condition. all the best, Jay

The clonazepam... at around 1mg, i get a mild reduction in visual symptoms and trippy feeling, but quite a strong reduction in anxiety. Good for family gatherings, parties etc... where the anxiety would usually be a little higher. At 1.5mg-2mg... My visuals and the trippy feelings reduce significantly, upto around 70% reduction. Anxiety is almost gone completely and I can deal with most anything.. clients meetings, public speaking etc. It also helps alot with the occasional hangover I tend to find myself with! After so long without a days relief (other than alcohol) it was almost a miracle.... In fact, the first time I took klono and felt like I had stopped tripping.... I got scared and actually went on the hunt for some weed to make me feel "normal" again... Strange how you get used to the hand you are dealt. If you are strong willed, I would give it a go. It is actually one of the safer meds you could get hold of as long as you don't drink with it.

Unfortunately for most of us here, the visuals are just the tip of the iceberg. I had what I would refer to as pre-hppd, something I think you have, where I had visuals and a bit of anxiety because of it, but I could easily enough ignore it. I then got full blown hppd, it is just not something that can be combated with a positive outlook and cognitive therapy techniques (though I agree that anxiety loops can make the condition worse). It is very hard to describe how mentally and physically ill this can make you feel if you progress with drugs after the initial visual problems. I still have a good, positive outlook on life... I can switch off anxiety loops fairly easily and can generally act like a normal member of society.... but inside, I have an illness that feels like like I have ingested lsd and poison at the same time. There is no switching that off.

Welcome to the site... I also went along time, 14 years i think, without knowing what this condition was... It is quite amazing when you finally hit the right search terms in google and find this place! The only treatment that seems to help me is Clonazepam.... I use it on a 3 days on, 4 days off basis.... It gives me a break from my symptoms, but the 4 days off seem to help avoid addiction and tolerance (I have more or less stuck to this for 5 years now, occasionally taking a 7-14 day break from the med to make sure I am not getting addicted). It has made my life quite a lot more bearable. But do you research, especially about the addiction side of things (and depression side effects).

it is something i have always wanted to try but never find the time or a relaxing area to do it in... I look forward to hearing about your techniques

I used to take drugs for very similar reasons to those you listed.... To cover up or change my perceived personality issues, to chase the idea that drugs increased creativity and to seek a generally more interesting and enlightened path. LSD did help with all those things, and, for a time, my life was improved because of it. BUT I'm now 19 years into this illness and I can tell you that I would cut off both my arms, take on cancer... hell, i'd go blind if it just meant even 1 year of peace and happiness. I had to take 3mg of klonopin to get through my wedding day without feeling like I was on a full trip and breaking down with anxiety... Not exactly what most people go through on the "happiest day of your life". If you do take LSD... stick to the usual guidelines.... Safe place, only with your best and most trusted friends, have a sober sitter (if possible), prepare some relaxing music and settings for if things go downhill. Possibly have some valium or similar on hand to bring you down (someone smarter than me might want to chip in on if that is dangerous). Maybe some inositol or 5htp to help protect the serotonin receptors (is there something similar for dopamine and GABAa receptors?) As Visual mentioned... Life is the true rush though.... full of creativity, beauty, darkness, fear, laughter, madness.... anything and everything you could find from a drug. Go and find it for yourself rather than taking a shortcut that could ruin your life.

i'm on the e-cigs, not had a proper cig for over 2 months now. Love it, only when i'm having a beer though.... I can see e-cigs being pretty addictive. Body feels healthier for it though.

That is 24/7, with the exception of the times I take Klonopin or get drunk, which helps make me feel a bit less trippy. Day to day though, it is the feeling of having taken around 1/2 an average strength tab (but with none of the fun, insightful feelings) The anxiety and panic can fluctuate though, depending on where I am and what I am doing.

Some symptoms got better (depression mainly) but generally it stays the same... crazy visuals, feel like i am tripping, anxiety. It has stayed the same for 19 years now.

I would say you have what I would call pre-hppd I had very similar symptoms after i first did lsd... They caused me some anxiety, but didn't really affect my life on a day to day basis, like full hppd does. I would strongly suggest never doing any drugs again, you never know which experience will take you from where you are now to the living hell that is full blown hppd. I hope this doesn't sound like I am belittling your problems

i'm no longer taking magnesium, but there is probably some in the multi vitamin i take

Floaters have nothing to do with hppd, I had them since I was a kid. My guess is that when on LSD and the days after, you were looking more closely at what is in your visual field and found it hard to filter out the floaters. It is 100% not hppd though, so don't panic. Floaters will come and go and are perfectly natural. Hopefully you have learnt a bit about hppd though, while here, and will be very respectful for hallucinogens from here on in.