trip into hell

recovering from hppd: took me almost 5 month until my visuals went away and the dp/dr faded about 1 month later or so... drugs while recovery..i tryed a view anti depressants but they made it worse and gave me horrible dp/dr and more visuals so i stopped immediately + 3 times i tryed extreme micro doses of tobacco or weed but they gave me dp/dr, strong visuals and panic attacks so i didnt do it anymore + i tryed a view times coffeine which made me feel dizzy and sick for a while and a view times alcohol which only increased visuals and next day slight dp/dr so i stopped that too i dont know exactly what i did for dp/dr to go away but my best guess is that it was a combination of not taking prescribed chemicals, avoiding drugs in general, trying not to think of dp/dr by just giving up to get cured and looking at it as a strange trip, healthy diet, some suppliments, naturals, socializing, laughing, long walks in nature and rarely doing some sports and meditation these days i can take small doses of all these substances again without relapse or anything..but still get panic attacks if i exceed my dose...i guess it takes me a while to fully enjoy these things again...anyway im now concentrating on my grow cbd extraction project which i started in a secret place with a very good friend of mine..i hope the cbd oil will help the anxiety to subside a little and since i had a cold 2 weeks ago it feels like the rest of my anxiety is improving and fading completely...its very strange..i am more confident than ever before since my onset ..dont even know whats going on with me..im just happy for the first time

i guess im lucky when it comes to this kind of problem i had a cold and it started 2 weeks ago and i even felt better then usual..it was crazy but it felt like an opium trip for about 1 1/2 week...i dont know exactly whats going on but my condition seems to improve since i had a cold...i know it sounds kind of foolish after almost one year of suffering but somehow and after all this i have the feeling for the first time that i can heal completely again...looks like im reaching the end of the tunnel soon...

as my hppd went away i was able to smoke small amounts of weed without going crazy...but i want to smoke as i used to again without having panic attacks cause they are annoying

no i didnt try it i didnt have enough money the last 2 moth cause i had to buy the extraction eqipment for my project..but i will in the following month... and im not against medication but against chemicals...i would even take tramal if it helps since its been discovered in nature.. these days im actually fucked up due to my high awareness of everything around and within me...i guess there is nothing out there that helps against awareness

wow that sounds terrible..and i thought im suffering...

i just cant accept it...it cant be...there must be something like a cure..some way to stop this.

so if its not anxiety related ..maybe you should go to a doctor just to be sure...and maybe take a look at your lifestyle (you know..diet, sports etc.)

congratulations....you really deserve that since your hppd never fully faded but even though mine is gone..life seems to be more about hopelessness, despair and anxiety for me..im really trying to do everything i could but i feel like one day i will end this nightmare if it wont stop on its own...

only during anxiety periods or panic attacks....even though sometimes and very rarely i feel a slight dicomfort in my chest but its not as intense.

i would like to think this way...but life has only negative possibilities left for me...i mean i dont wonder around all day what i could have been without this shit..but everything i do ends up in negativity...where is all the happiness gone, its impossible to enjoy life for me and my perspective is not responsible for that cause i always try to think positive otherwise i wouldnt be around anymore. im sure life has to be more fun and exciting..but it is no more..and seems that it will never be again....useless to look forward to something.

life has turned into a really insane and hopeless journey.for most people after hppd...i wish i could understand what all this shit means and maybe how to reverse it....

of course its lowering the intelligence (not necessarily the iq)...its kind of rough to live a whole life with this debilitating condition...im so sorry for you...my hppd left me after about 4 1/2 month but it almost led me to suicide...i just have to deal with almost constant exhaustion, concentration issues and rarely anxiety...but its the same for me..i still ask myself what would i be now if i wouldnt have taken an overdose of 8g of mushrooms at the beginning of this year...sometimes i think i destroyed all my life..but other times i come to the conclusion that i would still take various drugs like crazy...anyway its not fair..im now in a position where i realized that im just waiting to die...since nothing out there could make me happy anymore..not even drugs...i hate myself

oh ok...since you have restful sleep without nightmares it sounds like you have no trauma...maybe your anxiety symptoms are really caused by a health issue since this is also possible..some people even get panic attacks due to heart problems for example. yeah see a doc. my pleasure...and all the best.

why are you discussing different symptoms...they all have the same cause + they are different for everybody which makes it impossible that talking about it is helpful for the individual...you cant compare youre situations just because its likely that you have the same mental condition....everyone has to find his/her own cure...to be honest..posting here never helped me and isnt responsible for my cure at all... have fun

lavender tea didnt do it for me since the teas you can buy dont contain enough lavender to really take effect + the teas mostly contain other substances which can have bad effects on anxiety sufferers...maybe try pure lavender oil...i used lasea (prepared lavender oil capsules) or take valerian....if that doesnt help maybe a microdose of kratom does the trick. your sleeping patterns sound pretty normal and healthy...do you have nightmares or very real dreams and would you say your sleep is restful? are your seizures like muscle twitching or something similar?...i still dont understand what you mean exactly by seizures. light sensitivity can be a result of many things and what you describe doesnt sound like epilepsy to me...since you never had an epileptic seizure..it would be much more serious. anyway im not a professional...go to a doctor just to be sure...

peanut the best you can do is stop obsessing (and maybe take valerian or lavender to calm down a little bit) and the best way to do this is giving up about getting better first...i know it sounds weird. and the golden rule i was following never take chemicals to treat this i found that even if they patch unwanted symptoms..they can not treat anything and will lead to long term irreversible damage...and you want to heal not destroy yourself. + avoid unnecessary and unhealthy stress and let time pass...all the best im in psycho therapy and i dont know if it helps...i think ive made the biggest progress on my own..dont know if there is anything out there that really helps instead of naturals...i think its always good to talk to someone about it...but to answer your question..i havent been to a specialist...i hope it will get better somehow.and feel terrible the last days cause i caught a fucking cold.

thanks! ive treated myself the best i could...but i seem to be stuck at this stage and dont know what to do to get any better i think ive done everything possible. ..these days i dont get panic attacks randomly anymore and as i mentioned i can smoke small amounts of weed but its not quite the same as before my onset + if i smoke more i get a serious panic attack. yes you will get better ..when i had hppd i had some relapses from druguse too but fortunately i never took more than extremely small amounts...for me it took 2 hellish weeks to recover from that. you must hang in peanut, and dont give up the hope but let go the idea of a cure..sometimes you need to give up first to have any chance to win. im sorry that you cant enjoy drugs and partys anymore...try to see life as only a single stage of existence and if your time here is over you can look forward to a way better place...im not religious...i dont know but when i smoked dmt i came to the conclusion that it must be this way (since dmt is released in the brain if we die and able to simulate death) and these days this idea gives me comfort and the power to hang in again... i hope this is helpful in some way.

my hppd is over but it took me 4 1/2 month and i have still a panic disorder...means i get panic attacks from more than a microdose of marijuana or something else...im sorry to tell you but for most of the people who came over this..the party seems to be still over for the rest of their lives...and i really loved ''drugs'' i was always enjoying them like crazy until my overdose of mushrooms...now im just a piece of shit for the rest of my life cause i cant appreciate for it as much as before..its just eternal agony..i hope to die early. dont give up peanut

man i had physical suffering too...and it was also pretty strong...and yes you're right physical suffering is not mentioned in the dsm when it comes to hppd...when i had my onset i also realized that what i got isnt just hppd..there must be something else and i realized that i had an anxiety disorder which caused me tramendous suffering and both hppd and the anxiety disorder started at the same time...i suggest you look up anxiety disorder symptoms cause the fear of having a heart attack is very typical for anxiety disorders as many others...i remember that i went through several checks due to numerous health issues i thought i may have (including the fear of a heart attack) with no result...it never happened ° really...even if you think its bullshit...and you dont believe me...just look up anxiety disorders..everything you can find...it sounds very similar to your problem..even i thought it cant be true first but i found myself in the description of the anxiety disorder and the reports of many sufferers. ° and anyway...no matter if you have anxiety or hppd or both...try the naturals i recommended they arent addictive and really help to calm down ° what kind of seizure are you talking about? ° how well and how long do you sleep?

i always wanted to smoke as normal since my hppd onset...now its over and i can smoke small amounts but i still have panic disorder and when i smoke before having responsibilities or even smoke too much i get a panic attack...i really love smoking and had many nightmares about doing it..and came to the conclusion that you must give it up and let it go until you stop worrying about it then you can smoke one day again...but never force something...to me weed has gotten psychedelic so i have to be careful with my anxiety disorder when it comes too drugs of every kind. just dont think about something you cant know..it is what guarantees to make it worse when you smoke...i suggest that you keep in mind of being free to smoke but dont force it if you worry about it before...just remember that anxiety is not why you smoke..you smoke to chill out and socialize as normal...and if this isnt possible due to worry, you have no reason to smoke...and for sure you will have enough time to smoke in your life if you feel comfortable with the thought of doing it...so dont put yourself under pressure....relax

one thing i know is i had my hppd from an overdose of mushrooms and had it pretty bad for about 4 1/2 month..now its over...dont obsess about it even though its hard to ignore the visuals..try to see this as tripping for free somehow and distract yourself by doing something you always liked + stop taking drugs and avoid altered states..what helped me was valerian and lavender or even passion flower...eating healthy and think positive...try all your best but dont think you can win the battle by fighting...you have to give up and accept it before there is any chance of winning the game...and even then you have to hang in in this position for a long time...i know its very tough..but you can beat it...good luck and all the best

the strange thing is that it causes anxiety for you since all the gaba release based meds like for example benzos..are very effective against anxiety...mostly it is serotonin that causes anxiety which i realized when i tried various anti depressants.

ya green tea is good for health...isnt it strange that most of the relaxing + very good and healthy substances are green XD...to me its the colour of hope somehow

i drink green tea every day and it always feels like im on low doses of speed...very nice

ah ok so its just no good idea for you to combine keppra and caffeine since mountain dew doesnt contain much caffeine