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morbide

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Everything posted by morbide

  1. This friday it's inevitable for me to grab a few beers, i'll update you afterwards
  2. Yeah i feel that anxiety boosts the visuals or maybe makes me noticing them more.
  3. Play bf on the computer instead, i will slaughter you! Regarding tattoos, if i get rid of hppd i will definetely (spelning?) get a symbolic tattoo.
  4. Winterhat, or "bearpussy" as we swedes call it
  5. @ The jew memorial in Berlin last summer, still a little happy. Mostly hungover, the germans sure know how to party... ~3 months before onset.
  6. Well it shouldn't be too hard to get prescribed
  7. Lovely picture! I can't wait for the summer to hit Sweden, this time of the year it's just snowy, gray and cold.
  8. Same here... They w.orld isn't as beautiful as it used to be
  9. Hello everyone, i found a link to a simulator which makes it easier to explain your visual snow http://www.thevisioncommunity.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=78&Itemid=171 How bad is yours? Mine is: Background: 4 Snow density: 20 Flicker rate: 2
  10. Same here, everyday when i wake up i hope that when i open my eyes, the static will be gone... If your symtoms are sporadic ferret i don't think it's hppd anymore, it's right there in the name Hallucingoen PERSISTING Perception disorder. Lucky you anyhoo
  11. Nope, i always see a thick intense layer of static but it almost goes away for a couple of minutes when i have a cigarette.
  12. Meh , they are not so frightening as long as you get used to them
  13. I can't complain, couldn't sit for a while God im getting the itches to ski again, to go up north to the clean air and... the polarbears.
  14. Go for it man, hppd can't take away every satisfaction in our lifes!
  15. Downhill mostly, though im learning to jump and do some trix, almost shattered my tailbone(?) this winter when i crashlanded after a jump...
  16. I love skiing and it helps me to not think about my hppd at all, lovely hobby. This picture is about 6 months prior to hppd. Pic relatid: me skiing.
  17. I was also scared but i could not imagine it getting worse only becouse of a single beer, your call though Just don't overdo it! Actually i have occasionally gotten pissdrunk without any effect on hppd.
  18. Yes it's no problem with a couple of beers but last weekend when i went to bed i got crazy spammerhandbag hallucinations after a night of drinking alot although it was only with closed eyes. Glad i wasn't sleeping alone then but It sucked really hard. Hangover wasn't severe though.
  19. Well the alcohol ain't easy to stay away from, there are millions of graduation parties right now
  20. I have no idea, the active substance is called hydroxyzine, look for non-perscription allergymeds on wallmart or at a drugstore. I am not from the US but doesn't wallmart have everything?
  21. What you experience is not a flashback, it's just the brain trying to sort out the visual snow and find patterns in it, i get it all the time. Btw, isn't flashbacks just small periods of hppd symtoms flashing up? We have them all the time but some people just get it for a couple of minutes occasionally.
  22. Good evening everone! I've been posting a little on this forum but i guess it's time for a proper introduction I am 18 years old, i live in Stockholm, Sweden and i've been suffering from mild hppd for ~7 months i guess. It all started a couple of months after my second use of hallucinogenes, i went through a trip from hell using ~70 mg of 4-HO-MET, shitty drug. Anyhoo, a couple of months after that i was at home watching tv when i suddenly noticed that the walls were breathing and all of a sudden the whole room was covered in static.As i was suspicious i googled for "4-Ho-MET side effects" and i read about hppd, the breathing and the static was spot on, i got a little anxious and scared but i didn't really care then. My life went on, i smoked the occasional spliff, turned 18 and went out clubbing and drinking every weekend until i overdid it once. The next day along with an infernal hangover came several panicattacks which must have triggered my hppd even more becouse since then (4 months ago approximately) i haven't been the same. First the dp and dr hit me like a bottle to the head and as time went on i started noticing even more symptoms and i started reading more and more about hppd. Now even more symptoms were spot on. I started getting more anxious over my visual snow, afterimages and the fact that things were moving if i looked at them for a couple of seconds at a time. Nowadays not a single day is the other alike, somedays my symptoms are terrible and somedays they are not but mostly it's going steady and i am very happy that i am not suffering from dp/dr anymore, right now visual snow is my biggest concern actually. If i wake up without visual snow i call cured, afterimages doesn't really bother me and neither does floaters but i guess the research goes forward and there is no reason to let it take over my life. Long story short, my biggest problems are the visual snow and the constant fear of it getting worse. I guess i don't have any good tips for anyone except to get rid of their anxiety, i have been diagnosed with GAD and panicsyndrome wich is a bitch but hey, i am still alive and i have caring friends and family! And maybe it's for the better to get a little personal so here's a picture of me, pre-hppd, happy as a clam and "smiling" like a fag Best of regards // Morbide. I apologize for a messy text but us swedes aren't famous for our english!
  23. Yea i hear you really, my symptoms are really mild but as you say the constant fear of it getting worse is killing me! I'd love to have some beers with either my friends or my girlfriend without fearing for the worst...
  24. Wow are you really experiencing visuals like those on the bag??
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