TheGman6072

I sometimes trip the fuck out and I don't know why but it randomly happens where I feel like I just took 3 different drugs and other times I feel like I'm stoned. I feel like I'm in a dream and watching my life from behind a screen as if I'm not really there. I would sometimes say something like "never ending trip" and I always think that I'm fried

Yes they do exist. They're called benzos and opiates

They're* ^ Lol

I feel you but I still walk around with a fake ass smile and I always put on an act cuz I don't like people asking me "you alright ?"

Oops it cut me off. Following a conversation or listening to a teacher speak is very difficult as my brain just fogs up. I always feel like I'm not really here. I'm just watching my entire life from 3rd person like from behind a screen. Some people may disagree but I think HPPD and dp/dr could be some kind of "damage"

All of this is very similar to what I experience but I also see colors plus walls appear to breath or they even appear to be melting. I have a bunch of other visuals that are very hard to describe. My memory is pretty bad. I read a book and then I almost instantly forget what I just read. I sometimes forget an entire day at school. I would often feel like I'm going insane. Before I ever knew what HPPD and dp/dr was, I thought I had brain damage and had no idea what was going on with me. If I relax, I all of a sudden become stoned and it's very hard to get out of it. I sometimes start tripping out even though I hadn't taken any drugs and it just would hit me for no reason. I also get the headaches but I got used to them most of the time and only bothers me when they get very bad.

The halos are one of the main ones I see. I highly doubt it's normal to see halos sticking out like 6 inches from my phone

I know that everybody has starburst so when I list my symptoms, I don't mention starburst

But yeah I was alone

I didn't get drunk. I took two massive gulps and I almost threw up. I dumped the rest because it was disgusting. Way more disgusting than beer

But yeah I have just lost all respect for my parents cuz they are dicks

Update : I am BrandonKing but I had my username changed

In September, I told both my parents everything about the HPPD, and depersonalization/derealization. I have started to realize that was a big mistake. They are both the most unsupportive morons ever. They agreed to make appointments and my plan was to get meds prescribed but then my mom surprises me with "this entire time, you thought I was going to let you get a seizure medication prescribed to help with visual disturbances ?" Every time I have one of my dp moments, they think I'm high and I can't seem to convince them I'm not because they so strongly believe that I'm still taking drugs. even when I say "go ahead and drug test me", they refuse. I'm so done with them and I'm thinking about asking to move to New Mexico with my aunt to get away from them. Every time I ask about my appointment or for other help or when I try to explain everything, they just start attacking me.

I tried to drink wine but it was disgusting almost threw up it was so bad lol

I highly doubt I will take enough to become addicted as I will not be taking it every day. That would just lead me to addiction

I might get some edibles from a guy at school for free and then sell them.

Ok I just tried drinking one of my grandfather's wines and god damn that was repulsive ! It was too disgusting I dumped the rest of it lol beer never tasted that bad

I'll try drinking but I have no plans to smoke weed or any of that shit that could harm my HPPD. Even if I do, I'm not going to tell anyone or even post about it on here cuz that would just make me look bad

Well I'm going to try chugging one of my grandfather's wines to see if I will like it. Even if I like it, it will probably be the last time I ever drink cuz I'm an alcoholic risk

being home is worse than being at school cuz to me, home is prison

I just had to skip school today cuz I was starting to trip out again. I took a nap for like an hour and woke up all sweaty and cold plus I felt like I was stoned. I was kinda hungry so I went back to the schoo during lunchl, hung out with a couple friends and then left again now I'm riding around on my bike and I forgot how great it felt to ride around the wetlands

Will getting drunk make HPPD and dp/dr worse or will it not affect it ? I haven't gotten drunk in a long time and I have kinda been thinking about it for the past few days. I don't really remember the last time I got drunk.

The opiates don't make the dp/dr or HPPD worse. The purpose of doing this is to help the HPPD and dp/dr symptoms and calm me down

The headache does seem to move sometimes. I have had HPPD since June of 2014 but it got much worse around July of this year

I have the head pain and it sucks but it often would get to the point where I couldn't talk and has even gotten to the point where I collapsed. I have neck pain but my neck pain is not related to my HPPD. I get dizzy and sick sometimes especially in the morning. My gag reflex is bad. Sticking anything in my mouth makes me gag even brushing my teeth makes me gag a little bit and I can't swallow pills without almost throwing up. I get motion sickness often when reading cuz the text would be moving and spreading apart