Gmo

That pretty much hit the nail on the head..........and @odysseus how do you fix perception??? It's an odd thing to consider. Maybe just waiting it out is the only solution.

This is for those of you that have DP or have experienced it at some point......But does anyone know what's actually going on to cause these feelings??? It feels like I'm disconnected from my body 24/7 but it's like what's disconnected from my body??? I don't get it....I mean I am my body so how is it that I feel disconnected from it?? How can I be dissociated from me if I am me??? I don't get get.......I know this probably sounds a bit crazy, especially to anyone that's never experienced DP, but I promise I'm not crazy, I just really can't understand how it's possible to feel this way without taking drugs sometime recently. In a physiological sense does anyone know what causes dissociation??? I've been searching online all day but nothing gives a straight answer. I feel like if I knew what causes this I could do something more active to get rid of it than just sitting around being pissed about it all the time.

^^^^ There's definitely a degree of self-projection in situations like these....it's kind of unavoidable though. In all honesty, based off of my group of drug using friends and other drug forums I read on, I think people developing long-term significant problems from psyches are in the minority. That being said, I think everyone who uses them significantly, experiences to some extent, some visual or perceptual changes and maybe some differences in the way they operate mentally. I have a few friends who've confided in me that psyches have made things different for them, but no one's ever described anything near what I go through. So really it just comes down to the individual..........we're pretty much all gonna tell you that you're taking risks because this is a site built for people specifically experiences negative reactions to drugs.......but if you were to go on shroomery or bluelight, the majority of the people would tell you that HPPD and drug related issues are vastly overstated and not something you should worry about. So really it just depends on who you talk to. But to answer your question, I continued to smoke weed and I smoked DMT a few times and tripped LSD once more after I started getting warning signs. It took about six months after my initial warning signs before I developed DP and I've had it since. My personal opinion, is do you what you want, if you wanna get fucked up get fucked up.....it's your life, but just know there are risks.

^^^Do you have DP 24/7 now??

I don't think you have much to worry about. You only tripped once, and it was only 1.5 grams......I'm not trying to knock you or anything all I'm saying is I think worrying at this point would be the worst thing you could do for yourself. Just abstain from substances for a while and after you've read the responses to this thread don't look up anything else about HPPD. Anyone on here will tell you that worrying about it makes your issues WAAAAY worse than they are when you're just chillin and doin your thing. So, you probably do have very mild HPPD but if you stop worrying about it and just accept that it's there for the time being then I'm sure you'll be fine.

What symptoms do you have?? Do you have DP/DR too?? I've had pretty serious issues for a year now and it's really depressing. Don't kill yourself though.....seriously, regardless of how bad it gets there's always someone else out there that has it worse. I get down feeling sorry for myself from time to time but at the end of the day there's worse shit that could happen. Cancer jumps to mind initially, I can't imagine being diagnosed with that.....I'd take HPPD over cancer any day. Also, a few months ago a kid I went to highschool with had a really bad 4 wheeler accident and had to have his arm amputated.......around the time I heard about that I was feeling sorry for myself and obsessing over how it's not fair that I feel this way, but I'd much rather have both my arms and deal with this than be 100% mentally ok and lose a limb. I know that's kind of irrelevant to your situation but the point is it could always be worse and it's not worth killing yourself over.

Yea, I just got done running actually. I'm pretty active.

I was 20, I'm 21 now.

I've had HPPD for a year and a half and DP for a year. It's gotten a lot better, I feel like the HPPD isn't so much a problem anymore, it's really the DP that bothers me the most. Everything still looks really hyper-defined and slightly cartoony but it doesn't really bother me anymore, it's really just his detachment from myself. I feel like if DP went away I'd be in pretty solid shape mentally.

17 years??? I won't put up with this for much longer. This is seriously draining the life out of me. Did you keep using drugs after DP hit initially??

@Jay when did your DP show up??? I can't take much more of this shit, I feel like it's at the core of all my problems.

Yea, Idk it's hard to speculate. It seems like all our situations are different too. I was never the highest or rolling the hardest or anything. I always reacted normally to everything and was usually on the same level as everyone else.....so Idk what the deal is. All I know is this is some bullshit.

I agree, I had a couple of my friends mention things before.......it didn't seem like they had long term issues, just minor stuff reall. Idk I just wish I knew why this happened to us while there are so many people out there that use drugs heavily and remain fairly normal. I've read on here where some people only tripped a few times or less and got stuck with permanent visuals. This shit's not fair. I know I sound pretty whiny right now, and I apologize for that, I've just been in a really pessimistic mood lately with it being festival season and all and I just can't stop brooding over why things played out this way. Idk if I should blame myself or just fate or chance or what.

I just got off Facebook and a lot of my old druggie buddies were posting about Wakarusa and uploading pictures and stuff. It was pretty obvious in certain pictures that they were off their rockers on X and whatever else. It kinda amazes me and pisses me off at the same time that they're still able to take drugs and stuff. I mean I don't know for sure that they don't have HPPD symptoms but obviously they don't have it bad enough or they wouldn't still be using as often as they do. So why did we have to get this??? Is there something different with our brains or something that makes us more predisposed towards effects from psyches or what??? I just don't get it. I would love to still be able to roll/smoke/drink without feeling like I'm tripping balls in a bad way.

I'm not the person you're asking but I don't think so.........After 9 years even without HPPD someone would more than likely significantly change. Time will do that to you, but coupled with all these experiences and time I don't think it's possible for any of us to be the same as we once were. We might oneday be better off than we used to be or we might always be a little worse off than we used to be, but I don't think we'll ever be the same. There's no going back.

@IthinkIdosed2much.....I know how you feel, I'm really into the Electronic scene right now too and have been for a couple years now, I'm actually going to a mini fest this weekend. All my friends do/did drugs to but really a break is what it's gonna come to. The sooner you do it, the sooner you'll be able to get back to the scene and started enjoying substances again. @SpecialK, back in the day when you first quit smoking weed what did it make you feel like??? And it doesn't make you anxious or anything anymore??

^^^^^ I have that too. Whenever I'm in a really anxious situation I get really autotone and it's like I lose all the inflection in my voice.

DP is definitely the shittiest part of all this for me. I would gladly deal with the visual snow if I could just get this DP to go away for a while.

I've experienced this. I think it might have to do with the foods that you're eating, that's what it is for me anyways. Whenever I pretty good homeade stuff I feel fine afterwards but whenever I go to Burger King or any other fast food place and get shitty food I feel like shit afterwards and feel really spacey and way more disconnected.

^^^^^You're right. Only we know what's gonna work for us. I think, in regards to weed, it depends on the individual and how bad their HPPD/anxiety/whatever is. You don't sound like you have it too badly at this point so you're still able to enjoy weed. I think that the people telling you to stop smoking aren't doing it with a 100% certainty that it will make you worse but more so along the line that a lot of people's HPPD was made worse by continuing to smoke so there's a possibility it could happen to you too. Which it may not, but it could.

@Boogres how long have you had DP?

Thats prolly all they could give you yea.....How exactly do you feel when you smoke weed now compared to how you used to feel?? This whole thing started for me with weed becoming really psychedelic and trippy. It would put me in that psychedelic head space where I was having like 50 thoughts a second and my mind was all over the place and I just felt really amped up and on edge like when you're trippin balls on acid or something.........*sigh* I miss the old clean highs with no visuals, and all I'd do was sit around and bull shit with my friends and eat until I felt like I was gonna die.

Yea I wouldn't worry about it dude......3 months really isn't that long. I'm not tryin to downplay what you're goin through or anything, cause I know it's shitty, I'm just sayin. Back when I first got this it really started to spiral out of control when I would lay around thinking I had fucked my brain up for life and that I'd never get a good job or be successful cause of drugs.....I honestly thought I might have to drop out of college, but I didn't, I was just being overly paranoid. Just try to think positive and keep busy with hobbies and exercising and eating right.

I don't wanna sound like a broken record but I'd say quit smoking for now too. My situation was similar to yours. Mine all started with visual snow and and mild HPPD so I quit tripping and taking X but kept smoking.......the smoking just kept my visuals aggravated and I never really gave my brain a chance to recalibrate. A couple months later I tripped again on LSD and a couple weeks later on DMT and then a few weeks after that I got DP and I've had it since. I think if I had dropped everything initially my issues woulnd't be as bad as they are now and I'd probably be able to enjoy a little MDMA from time to time. But to answer your questions, I think that if you were to drop everything right now for around 4-6 months and be more or less sober, except for maybe a little alcohol here and there, and you gave your brain the rest it needs then you'd prolly be able to go back to taking MDMA and smoking responsibly. I'd go ahead and call it quits with tripping though.....if you really wanna chance it you should stick with shrooms and leave acid alone. But, if you keep indulging now I imagine your issues will get worse until you decide it's time to stop and then the waiting period for you to return to normal will be even longer. That being said, at the end of the day it's up to you.

Yea I couldn't smoke weed right now......I was properly trippin balls last time I did. I also feel like I might not of gotten DP if I had of quit smokin initially. I'd prolly try if I could get some with altered THC levels like you can though. Maybe in a couple years after (hopefully) my HPPD and DP goes away I'll try it again, I'd like to.