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Hello. My name is Harry and i am 22 years old. I have been suffered from HPPD for 2 years now. Because i was gonna try mdma just once, and it fucked me up. feeling of tripping, headache and blurred vision, Dp has been my syntoms. but my mom recently died, and my Dr/Dp is now baaaad now. And it scares me. I dont know what to do at all. And i have a hard time looking foward with brightness. I feel like im going to die young, and have a dark sky over my head. and I havent told anyone. My family is alredy broken because the loss of my dear mother.. Im fucking broken.. I have my own company with a friend, thats accually very succsesfull. And its so hard, to deal with this, at the same time that i have so big responsable.. I have made it good for myself because hope and optimism has driven me to work hard. But now, everything is more unclear and dark.

I didnt had the balls to sign up on HPPD forum, before now. Because i didn’t accept my disorder. But this is a big problem for me, and i am not so patient:(


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Hi Harry,.. very sorry to her about your you mum dying, must be heart breaking. Stress is a huge factor in HPPD and grief is the worst stress you can get. As the grief slowly passes, the stress will too, which will help your dp/dr. I would chat to your business partner about having some time off, or at least lessen your hours. Dealing with your grief and mental health is the most important thing now. I'm sure something can be arranged, but you need to begin to talk about things with people near and dear to you (even if you don't mention hppd specifically).

Are you trying any medication?

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Losing your mom so young must be rough.  

One of the things that helped me with hppd was, simply put, staying focused.  I thew myself into school, work, raising a family, etc.  I tried to keep my mind occupied as much as possible.  It helped ... a lot!

Losing a family member, especially when that person was the heart of the family, is devistating.  Give yourself time to work it through.  My approach was to think about and talk about all the positive things that person brought into my life.  

Take care, hang in there.

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