Jay1

Deffo possible to have hppd with no dp/dr

It's something that bugged me for years... I then went through a time of pretty much always wearing sunglasses, indoors and out and it went away (for good). Maybe just coincidence, but probably worth a try (along with everything else you are doing, which sounds great). You just have to accept that your friends will laugh at you and call you Bono

100%, never be scared to move on from a doctor if you think they are uniformed or not empathetic to your situation.

It's not as solid as that... but not too far off. The way it flashes and inverts is the same too.

Hey Liam, i'm no expert on this, but your taper method looks pretty good to me, as long as week 1 goes ok. 4 months at 0.5mg should be pretty easy to get through. I know a few people who have cold turkey'd from 0.5mg and even 1mg and it's been a breeze for them, but I think tapering makes the most sense, as you don't want to stress your system (and as we know, everyone is different). Hopefully some of our users who have been through this can chip in. If not, maybe ask on reddit? Good luck and keep us posted. Jay

Hey, thanks for sharing your story. I get very similar after images as shown in the video (looking at that second image is creating an after image feedback loop!) It sounds like you've been through hell, but, as you say, that has made you very strong too. Have you explored any meds? How about things like meditation? re: Chatting to other people.. It is easy to assume that people just think you are talking shit or a nutjob... But the chances are, they have been through some shit themselves and will empathise. For years, I assumed everyone thought i was this messed up bundle of anxiety and madness because that's how I saw myself... Yet when I slowly started telling people about my issues, they were surprised as they thought I was this fun, laid back and chilled out guy. It's amazing how other people perceive you! Keep on fighting, All the best, Jay

Hey! I just wanted to wish everyone a happy new year and hope you have all had a happy holiday. I know this time of year can be tough when everyone else seems to effortlessly enjoy themselves, but hopefully each of you has managed to get some peace and joy throughout this time. I always try to remain positive as we enter a new year. We never know what might be around the corner and change can sometimes happen very quickly. Hopefully 2023 is the year we see a new breakthrough. Love to you all. Stay strong, Jay.

Do you think you have bi-polar, or are the doctors just hearing the words "drugs" and "mental health issues" and being lazy? I wouldn't want to encourage you to do anything without a doctor's advice... But throwing that many meds at an issue, so early on, just seems very OTT. If it were me, i'd be asking for a 2nd opinion.

That's a lot of meds to be taking. It would be near impossible to know if any are doing good/harm. Especially if clonazepam is masking some symptoms. Are they all meds for hppd, or some that you were already taking?

Yea, i get this occasionally. There is a boardwalk along a beach where i lived and the straight lines of each board would distort and get wavy if a walked at the right speed.

Hi, That's a lot of medication to be taking, imho. You will have to deal with the fall out of clonazepam addiction at some point, if you stay on 2mg a day. I don't want to scare you, but also don't want you to be potentially unaware of the consequences, especially as they don't seem to be greatly reducing your symptoms.

Thanks for sharing. I think the samaritans gave some great advice there. Regret is a useful emotion for learning from your mistakes, but once you have learnt the lesson it was teaching, there is no point beating yourself up further. We are all fallible and many of us on here have slipped up and taken drugs again. Learn the lesson, then put it to bed and focus back on recovery. I hope you start to see some light at the end of the tunnel soon. HPPD is terrible at all times, but especially in those early months. Just keep battling through one day at a time. We are here for you. All the best, Jay

It's the first indications that you are prone to getting hppd, imho. But I probably wouldn't consider it hppd unless the visual issues are causing you anxiety/dpdr. I've always called that pre-hppd. I think if you stop taking drugs and just live an active life, you will quickly start to completely forget about the issues. Human vision is flawed and the more you read about hppd and it's symptoms, the more you will constantly scan your visual field for issues and start seeing those natural flaws... Once the genie is out of the bottle, it's hard to put it back in. Distraction is the best bet.

Stay strong mate, your brain/body has managed to get on top of this once, so it is likely you can do it again. You are probably in a bit of a state of shock right now, but it is likely this is a drug induced spike that will start to calm down over the next weeks and months... Cling on to that hope and think about how good it's gonna feel once you get back to how you were last month. Also, just do whatever you can to de-stress and just distract yourself for a while... I don't know your full situation, but do whatever it takes, quit your job, move back home, sit and watch films 24/7 if that distracts you enough. You can build all that side of your life back up. Don't beat yourself up over taking drugs again, most of us have slipped up. If you have a doctor, chat to them about a short course of clonazepam, if you can take benzos, to get you through the worst of this spike (2-3 weeks or so) , then move to a more scheduled approach, so you don't get addicted (PM me for any help on this topic). We are here for you, just reach out whenever you need help. All the best, Jay

When you come up on mdma, you get flooded with serotonin (which partly controls how you feel nausea). You are also flooded with adrenaline and cortisol as your body is trying to accepts this chemical into the body. I don't know if you can test the amounts of these substances in the body, but worth chatting to your doctor about. If you are taking any meds or supplements that can increase serotonin, maybe chat to your doctor about tapering down. I think it's good to start the recovery journey with no additional substances... go totally clean and understand your mind/body's baseline. Then, if needed, start working with medications and supplements slowly, to really know how each affects your baseline. Try not to focus on this idea of something never passing. 2.5 months is way, way too early to be thinking about that. I hope that doesn't sound belittling, I am sure it feels horrible and scary... But there is so much anecdotal evidence of people getting better over months and years, not just in the first few months.

I've occasionally fucked up and fallen off the wagon, sometimes got lucky and had no lingering issues, sometimes made myself much worse (short term and long term)... Best thing to do is learn from it and then try to get back on the wagon and stay on it. Worst thing to do is beat yourself up about being a fallible human being, we all are.

The only time I have experienced prolonged nausea is after being very ill, once with swine flu and once with covid. I felt very sick for 1-2 months after. I do get physical symptoms from hppd, but they are anxiety related... A tightness around my chest, breathing difficulties, an overload of adrenaline etc Could it be a side effect of any medication? Keep pressuring your doctor for more answers, I really don't think this is hppd related.

You sound like you are in a very good place. It really should answer your own question. When we talk about russian roulette on here... It's a pretty accurate analogy. One trip can end your life as you know it, not physically, but mentally (which is arguably worse).

Yea, as Nick said, it's really impossible for anyone to say (if someone says you will definitely be safe, or definitely make you worse, they are lying). I have tried DMT, Salvia, Ketamine and a few other drugs since getting HPPD and they all made my symptoms worse (I got to a point where thought i'd hit the wall of what HPPD can be, man was I proved wrong!). On a side note, I don't think DMT is the pinnacle of pyschs. It's intense, no doubt about it, but i'm not sure it brings any more insight. If you ever had ego loss and the whole at one with the universe trip on lsd, DMT is not gonna take you to any new level of insights. So if you feel like you need to do DMT just to check it off a list, then it's probably not worth the potentially huge risk you are taking.

Anything that puts stress on your body can potentially make this worse. I've had flu, swine flu and covid, non of which made my symptoms worse in the long run, you just have to ride it out. Not sure about tamiflu.

It's still very early days, so I would try not to panic or stress. It's only been 2 weeks since you quit smoking weed, so you will only really know your hppd baseline in the next few months. It sounds like you have a mild version, which is the most likely to recover from, so things are looking positive. Just try to de-stress, don't look too much into hppd for a while, stay clean and try to exercise, eat healthy and distract yourself in whatever way helps to ease the worry and stress. On a side note, the floater is not hppd, you are just studying your visual field a lot more than you previously did and will see the imperfections of your eyes. I had floater when I was about 5 years old! Please keep us up to date and I hope we hear a recovery story soon!

Thank Thanks for the link, the eye tracking one is fascinating and shows how you visual system can fill in the blanks. I'll take a look through them all and see if any look like they could help with hppd/vs

4 days is way too soon for any of us to be able to say, i'm afraid. Just try to de-stress, don't take any drugs etc for a while and see what is going on. One thing I can say with certainty though is that doing another dose any time soon is a huge gamble. Having lingering visuals is a big indicator that you could get HPPD. Adding any fuel to the fire, right now, is the worst possible idea. Keep us up to date as the days/weeks go on. Hopefully it is something that will go away soon.

It certainly sounds similar, just without the open eyed visuals usually associated with hppd. A lot of the issues sound like some form of DP/DR (The DP part is what makes you feel like you are not connected to your body, but the DR part is the more trippy/dreamy state of mind). I imagine all the same triggers will generally apply, so try to avoid things like caffeine, extra stress etc. Try to stay calm and see how this goes over the next few months. Good luck, Jay

If there are no ongoing, 24/7 visual symptoms, then it would likely be classed as DP/DR (Depersonalisation and Derealisation). That is what I have always considered at fault for my own constant feelings of trippiness. You really need to stop smoking weed. You will have next to no chance of any recovery if you are smoking daily. Whether you have HPPD or DP/DR is almost moot at this point... It seems that both issues are exasperated and dampened by the same things. No more drugs, no more caffeine, eat healthy, work out, distract yourself, de-stress yourself. If you get very desperate, benzos can help alleviate some of that trippy feeling (that and alcohol are the only two things that I have had any success with, both carry serious negatives and addiction potential though, so tread carefully)