I have a VERY similar case to you. Haven’t posted here in awhile, but due to recent troubles decided to come back. Probably not the best for my anxiety, but your case was so similar to mine I had to reach out.
In 2021 I did a lot of hallucinogenic substances. Mostly acid, I smoked weed everyday constantly, and occasionally shrooms. Didn’t notice much of anything then. I then tripped a couple of times in Summer 22, continued smoking everyday, then boom, two months later around October 22 I picked up on my symptoms. Was really anxious about it at first, quit smoking entirely, and then relapsed two months later in December. My symptoms between the months of my weed abstinence were visual snow (not as noticeable during the day but still noticeable, also still saw clear 20/20), closed-eye hallucinations ie. seeing blotches of color, colors moving around randomly, geometric patterns and overall can’t see pitch black when I close my eyes again. More sensitive to lights. Considered myself a pretty mild case. I can’t tell you if I noticed my visuals decreasing or not, but they just stopped bothering me at a point.
This is where the current story begins, to start, In the initial 2 month break I had with weed between October - December 22, my HPPD barely troubled me. I noticed it, of course, but it just didn’t get to my head. No anxiety, nothing. I was anxious when initially finding out about it, but due to how mild the case was, I think I was good. Before my break I had begun to limit the use of weed anyways with my GF, so I think I was good on that department too. Then, decided to smoke again. Fell into worse habits than I had prior, everyday I was high, smoking on either bud or a cart. At max I was only sober for a couple hours to a day. At first everything was fine, but then I started to get panic attacks and constantly greened out bc of the weed despite being able to handle it well prior (only if I was by myself), I could tell my visuals SLIGHTLY got worse. Slightly more sensitive to lights, no static increase, the closed eye hallucinations got more prevalent and I also noticed my mind producing RANDOM images in my head when I closed my eyes. It could literally be anything, person, etc very vague but I could make it out. After a final panic attack around LAST WEEK, I decided to fully quit weed again with my GF, cold turkey, all of that.
I thought it’d be a saving grace and I’d feel relieved, but everyday since I quit I’ve been feeling very anxious and I’ve grown paranoid of my HPPD again. It’s odd because I’m still a MILD case but the past week has been rough for my anxiety. Chest and stomach getting tight, sometimes my heart pumps faster, and generally I overthink. My anxiety has been the worst it’s been in my life, just because it’s been happening every single day since I’ve quit. I THINK my anxiety may be my body withdrawing from the weed, but I’m just not sure. I’ve never freaked out this much about my HPPD either until I quit. Though, I’ve had more trouble sleeping at night due to the rise in closed eyed hallucinations.
I just wanna get over this anxiety. I think this is the root of all problems. Yeah, my symptoms are noticeable, but I have an extremely mild case. It didn’t affect my anxiety this badly before when I originally quit weed, so I’m just lost. I’ve been considering finally opening up to my family about it or going to a doctor, but I’m not sure if I should just try and ride it out.
And, of course, I would prefer if all of this shit went away, but it could very well last forever. But if I manage to get the anxiety out of my life, I can handle it.
