Jay1

Your coping mechanism will get much better... you have already made the right decisions about helping yourself by cutting out the drugs and beer, I imagine you will see more and more improvements as time passes, do you exercise also, that would help? The 1st year is a real bitch, no getting away from it... my advice is to force yourself into situations that your condition makes you uncomfortable with.... the more you do it, the more it returns to some kind of normality. For instance, I had a very tough time looking people in the eyes when I first got hppd... but I forced myself to get back into the routine and now it is fine. This part might be bad advice, but it helped me.... treat yourself to a few beers every now and again... I can have 5-6 bottles and wake up feeling fine... if I go over the top and have too much, i'll drop a klonopin the next day. I just find that having a relaxing beer with friends and having a good laugh is worth any anxiety the next day. Just to give you a bit of insight into how life goes on... I got this in 1995 and have since got through university, started my own business, got married, traveled all over the world and have lived in a foreign country for the last 8 years, learning the language and experiencing a new culture.... something I had planned way before hppd. Life gets better but you have to fight even harder for your dreams. Good luck, Jay

yea, i get it too.... and agree, it doesn't look right maybe we are both having the same flashback though?

You say you know that you will not get better while using these drugs, this is true.... but... as Ludwig said.... the more important thing is that you could get worse, much, much worse. I'll assume, if you are still thinking of taking psychedelics, that you are not in an "every minute is a waking lsd hell" type of hppd? Do you really want the chance of getting severe hppd, just for another hit? Forget your friends being "lucky"... you don't know what is going on in their minds, they might be suffering from other side effects... alot of my friends who seemed to be immune to this stuff soon ended up with equally bad problem.. be it, they moved onto heroin/crack etc.. or ended up in prison or a mental hospital. It might end up that you are the lucky one who got early signs and managed to control it before you ruined your life. Try finding healthier ways to reach those levels of calmness and insight. I manage it through surfing and music... others here manage it through meditation or exercise. Good luck, Jay

I have been looking for alternatives to relying on Klonopin, therefore minimizing the risk of addiction. My doctor prescribed me a box of Phenobarbital, but it is very weak compared to Klonopin. Has anyone ever benefited from some of the stronger Barbs? My doctor understands my fear of addiction and has a plan to have me on klono (when needed) for 1 month, then a barbiturate (when needed) for 1 month. Giving the different receptors each drug work on time to recover. ps - I fully understand that Barbs are more addictive and dangerous than Benzos...

How long did you have these issues before getting hospitalised? I think your symptoms would have gone after 6 months of healthy living (this seems to be the case with weed/spice induced hppd). I'm more concerned about the meds you are on at such a young age. I would start tapering down from both and just try a few months without drugs, alcohol, cigarettes etc... and with lots of healthy food and exercise. I would bet my house that you would feel fine after a few months

yea, i've done plenty of coke post-hppd and never had an issue with it.... but remember that it is a nasty little drug at times, addictive, bad for your health, can make you paranoid and depressed and also just makes the night boring unless you keep on doing line after line. Although I love the odd binge, it is one of the most overrated and expensive drugs.

Welcome to the boards.... there are already some good posts and people here after we unfortunately lost the old server. I can say from experience that you can still do everything you ever dreamed of, even with the most severe case of hppd. You just need to keep on fighting and striving for the life you want. All the best, Jay

Luckily, I work from home, so mornings are spent doing exercise, a swim in the pool and checking email and news. Number one tip - Stay away from coffee

Congrats mate... once again, thank you from all the community and sufferers out there.

As a veteran of nearly 16 years (I think, hard to remember now).... the condition didn't ever really get better, but my coping mechanism improved massively. I've done things now that I thought would be impossible in that first year of hell.... college, started businesses, marriage, travel, played on stage in front of 100s of people etc etc

So, for most of us here... summer is on it's way. What are your plans? I think summer is the best time for us hppd'ers... for me at least, the sun makes me feel happier and more relaxed. I have some good plans this summer... we have booked 3 gigs a week with our band at various bars, have a month in iceland in June and we are arranging a small festival (just a few hundred people). Lots of good times. So let's hear what everyone is up to. Let the summer be long, hot and full of laughs.

The vaguely good news is that you can begin to enjoy life, even with hppd. I've said it a few times on the old board... after around 3-4 years I really started to live again, even with strong hppd.

This will sound soppy.... but i'd make sure my wife had the best day of her life (get your mind out of the gutter!), as she has never known me pre-hppd. I try my best to show her what I was like, but it is never fully possible. I'd love to just have a 100% happy, chilled day on the beach with her, nice meal and stuff.

i wish we could get some of these stronger opiates in europe.... all i can get is codeine (or heroin... not an option) probably for the best though, as i like opiates alot.

cheers mate.... good to see you back on here

English, live in Portugal

thanks mate... yea, i can work anywhere with the internet. I don't design much anymore though, just film and upload to make the screensavers... easy life

Here is what I do for a living: http://www.screenspro.com I designed the site, shot most of the video and manage the company. Not a bad way to make money

good luck, my friend... i hope it helps you

I have donated blood, post-hppd.... it was fine, in fact.. i felt a little less dp/dr for some reason.

Thanks mate... time for another one soon... champions league thread (I have tickets to the final, come on Man UTD!)

The first few weeks, I had alot of memory loss and that kind of drunk felling, but that has gone now, with the exception of the 2mg dose, which still dopes me up a bit. Even after a 1-2 week break, I find the dopey effect is much less than when I first started. I guess the receptors get used to the drug.

Over the years, I've tried a varied range of medication with some good and bad experiences. I can't remember the specifics of each, but will try and go over the important ones... Please note that these are personal experiences and everyone differs.... so tread carefully and consult your doctor. Prozac - awful, terrible anxiety, increase in visual problems. 5HTP - Seems to improve mood, with no side effects. Keppra - worked well, lowered visuals around 20% and also anxiety, dp/dr issues. (stopped taking after I had a problem losing my supply of Keppra while traveling, major flare up from stopping abruptly). Would consider trying again. Melatonin - Helps induce sleep, with no side effects. Pregabalin - Didn't seem to do anything, no side effects though. Phenobarbital - reduces anxiety slightly, potentiates Klonopin. Klonopin - reduces anxiety and visuals by around 70% at a dose of 2mg. So, what do I do now?? Currently, I have a system that seems to work pretty well for me. Along with healthy food and lots of exercise: Friday - 0.5mg klono / 100mg phenobarbital Saturday - 0.5mg klono / 100mg phenobarbital Sunday - 2mg klono Monday - 1mg klono / 100mg phenobarbital This gives me quite alot of relief over a 4 day period, then I clean my system for 3 days. Knowing I have another relaxed weekend coming keeps me sane and calm during the week. I also have a 7 day break from both drugs at the end of each month, to avoid addiction/tolerance. Please note that both these drugs are strong CNS depressants with well known down sides and should be mixed only at the advice of your doctor.

Thanks David.... all the best, Jay

Hi all, glad to see this place starting to fill up again. The loss of the old forum was a real shame. I think a medication sub forum is desperatly needed, it was such a great part of the old site and really helped me learn alot about what to consider and, perhaps more importantly, what to avoid. Who agrees?