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HPPD's effect on state of consciousness


Has HPPD effected your state of conciousness/ mental state  

21 members have voted

  1. 1. Has HPPD effected your state of conciousness/ mental state

    • Yes
      16
    • No
      1
    • Unsure
      5


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I am wondering how you feel HPPD has effect your state of conciousness. Since most of us have contracted HPPD through drug use, I'm sure we all know what it is like to feel high. Do you ever feel like HPPD has caused you to be permenantly high, or permenantly altered your state of consciousness? If all of your emotional and visua symptoms were to dissapear, would you still have HPPD?

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When i get excited or hyper i get paranoid cos i think im high, sometimes i feel a bit spacey. Certainly during the first few weeks i related every feeling to drugs. I feel excited like im on mdma, man im spaced like ket. Now, not so much, i usually feel pretty grounded with a 5 minute drdp tinge like every 6 or 7 hours

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Guest Fue_Basho

its hard to word (I have issues wording things sometimes) but I'd say it is like being high for me personally, only barely any of the euphoric "stoned" (or however you'd word it) feeling and just the foreboding, anxiety, paranoia etc...

like constantly waiting...waiting...for what?

peak? end of the "trip" (that has been going on for years, now and seems to be getting worse)? Death?

The end of the world?

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its hard to word (I have issues wording things sometimes) but I'd say it is like being high for me personally, only barely any of the euphoric "stoned" (or however you'd word it) feeling and just the foreboding, anxiety, paranoia etc...

like constantly waiting...waiting...for what?

peak? end of the "trip" (that has been going on for years, now and seems to be getting worse)? Death?

The end of the world?

YES! i get that feeling, like im waiting for something, then i think about what im waiting for and freak out. I feel like, futile and just worried that il run out of things to do or am living a dead end life. I usually relax by thinking " il visit one country every year " or somethin, to calm that feeling of running outta life to live

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It is my worst symptom... For sure.... I don't know if it is dr, dp or some other name.... I just feel like i'm trapped in that last hour of an acid trip... The fun has gone, disphoria has set in... But i'm still feeling that weird, trippy sensation.

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  • 1 month later...

This feeling is a total crap, short-term memory becomes a collander, everything flows away and i find difficult to understand what people are talking about, feels like u are at the same time in two places, and always force yourself to hppd-reality which causes anxiety and fear. Sometimes it happen on klono, and that is time when things get much worser, cause i find it impossible to put my thoughts in direct order, if they exist, lol.

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  • 3 weeks later...

Oh, yeah, that's the worst feeling. I think it's close related to the depersonalization. I often feel insecure and far away from the reality, like walking around without getting anywhere. I sometimes get thoughts like "Maybe i died that last time when i tripped on spice and now i'm dead" or "maybe i'm still tripping, laying there unconscious on the floor, dreaming this."

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Personally, I get a feeling like I'll never be normal again, then I get so worried I feel sick to the stomac.... I reassure myself that I'm not schizophrenic (because that seems a lot scarier to me) then I just sort of wait till the messed up stomac feeling goes away and I'm alright, but the damn snow looking effect is still there just less.

This can go away right?....

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It has gone away before for me personally but ..........i understand the schizoid feeling -----where you feel you are really reduced to a factory-line worker (like the only thing you are capable of is putting on bottlecaps, lol). Sometimes I feel like i have half a brain and if i try to tap into the "other side" of the brain, i feel as though I may start spiraling into the abyss. ..........It reminds me of a video I saw where this guy got into a motorcycle accident and .....well long story short he was so brain-damaged that he had the intellect of a 4 year old. He could barely talk at all, and when infrequently he had, he sounded archetypically "retarded". He was, i believe, paralyzed from the waist down, but he rarely left his bed at his adult home (that, frankly, seemed like a hospital). Anyway, they showed him a few years after the accident. They showed a large portion of him at that time. But later in the show, they fast-forwarded to our present time.......

16 years after the accident. And he was EXACTLY the same (just grey and old).

Anyway, (it's a documentary)......with his sister by his side, they asked him ".......Do you remember what happened to you 16 years ago?" "Do you remember about the accident?"

I took him a while or two to conjure up the memory from his ragged brain. Finally you can see his eyes start welling up with tears. But there was this indescribable emotional frustration, that all the main centers of the brain seemed to be so disjointed. And it was so sad because he knew something had happened............... But he only had enough cognitive function just to understand he was barely a mere shell of his former self 16 years earlier.

This was probably the most visceral, cathartic, pathetic thing i have ever seen ............that.... i think i was bawling my eyes out. ....... <exhale, ..lol>

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