Passion

Thank you for all your support and for sharing your thoughts with me. I am coping much better now. I do whatever it takes not to think about it. And yesterday was the most "normal" day of my life since I got this disorder. The symptoms weren't gone. I was just happy. ^--^ And one more question: Do you experience lack of.. interest in things and lack of happyness? Are you mad and.. numb most of the time? :c Or is it just me?

I do go to the gym sometimes. And I can enjoy life. But I can't stop thinking the "THINK IF" thoughts.. Such as: Think if I wasn't smoking that day. My life would have been awesome. And everytime I do think my life is great (even tho I have the disorders), I also think: IT WOULD HAVE BEEN EVEN BETTER WITHOUT THE DISORDERS. Then I feel sad about it. ;c Hahah.. I just need to let go. And it seems like I can't do it.. --------- And you wrote about the woods.. I loved the woods before. ... Now I am scared to even enter the woods. Because trees are so... flat. The trees are the worst thing to look at. ;c ;c They are flat. And as fast as I see a tree, I start thinking about my disorders again.. And question reality. It really sucks. And If I am at woods at night, I can't see a shit. I don't really have a nightvision at all.. or at least it feels like it when its dark. ;c Hahah.. Was at woods at night once after my bad trip... (Told about it in another post) .. Couldn't see my hand when I had it in front of my face. >.<'' So... How can I let go of my "think if this wouldn't have happened"-thougts? ;o ;c

Thank you for all your answers c; Made me feel better. I had megaanxiety before. Now I don't think I have it.. But.. I still got the derealization...... And depersonalization. I just think less of it. Like: Who cares why we exist. We just do. I honestly can't remember how the world looked before this shit happened to me ;c

14th april 2012. :C I am planning to make that day official as my birthday or something, since I am not likely coming back to my old self. Hahah, it's so weird the way you see the world and the existance of everything after a trip like that. ;o

Yo, I've seen Marilyn Manson with my own eyes. hlgkflskjfgkl GAH. He was great!

Already tried: Omega-3, DMAE, Magnesium, Vitamin B12, L-theanine, Ginkgo Biloba, Vitamin D, Rosenrot (?) and Ginseng. Ate them for 2-3 months.. Everything got better on the DPDR front. But it is not gone. o; The flatness disturbes me :c And the afterimages are not so much better than they were from the beginning.

Hello, I left this page a little while ago. But I am back to ask if somebody can relate to my symptoms. The world is kind of 2D and flat. Tree trunks are literally.. FLAT. And also: I have always had a poor vision. But now, even with contacts on.. Everything is quite weird. When I try to read text, doesn't matter how big it is.. It is kind of.. DOUBLE and blurred? Has anyone elses vision got worse? + got any vitamins that can improve the vision and make the afterimages decrease? Sorry for bad choice of words.. And excuse me my grammar. Having a bad day.

Hello, I have brootal afterimages.. :c Anything I lay my eyes on for less than a second is copying itself. I can live with it. But it is kind of annoying. Those of you who use medicine/vitamins.. Have you seen any improvements on the afterimages? Have any over the counter medicine helped you to get over that symptom?

Thank you *-*

YES! Got my vitamins now.. Took them 5 minutes ago. Let's see, shall we?

Really want to see Manson, even tho people say he suck's live.

We are going to make it through this! And yeah, forgot to answer your question. I am going to Denmark for like 4 days.. Then back to sweden, but another city, Gothenburg.. There I will go to a festival called Metaltown.. I am staying there until 19th of june.. And the rest of the time I will be at my boyfriends house. C;

Oh, thank you <; I am hoping for everyone to get better. Nobody should be suffering from this shit. No, I don't do sports ;c Hahah... I don't like it so much. I shall no more take a bigger dose than it says.. 1 pill a day is enough.

It makes me calm. The recommended dosage is: 1 pill a day. Yesterday I took 4. Today I took 2 in the morning and 3 now. Can't be such a good idea. But I need to calm down. :c I feel better today. But still. SO FUCKING STRANGE THAT I CAN'T REALLY FEEL REAL. ;c Hope the other stuff comes tomorrow.. Really hope so. Because I am going away for a month, and if the vitamins don't come tomorrow, I won't be able to take them until next month.. ;c But otherwise everything is great. ^-^ And unreal as usual.

287kr c;

I really hope so too <: Thank you for being here 2muchmandy.

I can't stand the feeling of unreality anymore. Bought many different sort of vitamins today. Hope to feel real again. :C My hppd is better I think, thanks to "GINKGO BILOBA"..

I don't feel real anymore.. not right now.

Today is my 19th birthday, and I feel dpdr:ed as hell. Suicide thoughts were not on the list today. But here they were. But I am going to get better. Just a weird day.

What is magnesium good for? Is it for anxiety or brain?

Glad everything went great in the end. <: Shall maybe try useing magnesium... Hahah.. Seems to help against dpdr. o;

How did you feel?

I think so too. He should kill hppd and dpdr. ;c Mostly dpdr. Cuz it's the worst feeling ever.

Sorry for the tripplepost. ;c Chuck Norris puched the button for me.

It isn't sooooo hard to learn. But it is pain in the ass. I am from Latvia originally... My first language is russian.