Palinopsia - Losing my sanity - Need Guidance

[BERSERK]

Have been struggling with palinopsia and monocular diplopia the last 8 years after a dxm trip. Am 24 years old now and 2 years sober due to probation. I cant begin to explain how much this has sapped my mental energy reserve. Im already struggling with nerve damage in the penis and legs from a bike accident and this is just the cherry on top. Ive resorted to living through a screen the last 6 years to cope with this as i dont notice hppd much at my pc. Everywhere else i go is just afterimage over afterimage in streaks. It makes me feel absolutely insane and the fact i come off as a nutjob trying to explain this to the average person, I don't even bother. The images below are an exact replica of what i perceive daily. Anyone else can relate on the palinopsia? Ive made it this long and have gotten close to taking my own life many times but i just cant do it. I dont want all this fight ive put up to go to nothing. The mental fortitude, compassion and maturity this condition has forced me to acquire is definitely a plus at times, it just gets exhausting. 

 

 

[Jay1]

Hey, thanks for sharing your story.

I get very similar after images as shown in the video (looking at that second image is creating an after image feedback loop!)

It sounds like you've been through hell, but, as you say, that has made you very strong too. Have you explored any meds? How about things like meditation?

re: Chatting to other people.. It is easy to assume that people just think you are talking shit or a nutjob... But the chances are, they have been through some shit themselves and will empathise. For years, I assumed everyone thought i was this messed up bundle of anxiety and madness because that's how I saw myself... Yet when I slowly started telling people about my issues, they were surprised as they thought I was this fun, laid back and chilled out guy. It's amazing how other people perceive you! 

Keep on fighting,

All the best, Jay

[BERSERK]

Appreciate that jay, can use all the support i can get. Do ya have a discord group that we can be apart of to communicate in voice etc? Supplement wise im looking at NAC, Coq10 and ashwaghanda 

[Akshay]

I have afterimages like you, but nearly no where as strong as that in the vedio.and doesn't happen often, the only issue i have is Starburts if this goes i will say I'm recovered. @Jay1 is your afterimages as strong as that in the vedio?

[Jay1]

4 hours ago, Akshay said:

I have afterimages like you, but nearly no where as strong as that in the vedio.and doesn't happen often, the only issue i have is Starburts if this goes i will say I'm recovered. @Jay1 is your afterimages as strong as that in the vedio?

It's not as solid as that... but not too far off. The way it flashes and inverts is the same too. 

[Fawkinchit]

I'm guessing you have already done physical exams to rule out completely all physical problems with the eyes that can cause these symptoms correct?

I could see these issues making it difficult to play Modern Warfare lol.

[BERSERK]

@Fawkinchit yes i have, definitely neurological as it started after a dxm trip. 

[Fawkinchit]

8 hours ago, BERSERK said:

@Fawkinchit yes i have, definitely neurological as it started after a dxm trip. 

Ok, yah, that's pretty consistent with some form of HPPD then.

[kynerer]

 

The image may also disappear completely, and reappear after a few seconds. And so several times. But this does not always happen, you need to understand what it depends on.

[Jjjj]

Have your symptoms improved? I have these same exact symptoms except a bit less severe but still very noticeable.