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naught550
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I personally haven't been diagnosed with hppd or anything due this a recently new to me, about two months ago i went through to separate bad trips in which i felt as if i was dieing. i fetl outta it for awhile but seemed to get better now its getting unbearable. things dont feel or look the same i know things are real but at the saem time i can't be sure if they are... im scared i feel like im dieing its getting worse day by day.

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I know how you feel Derealization sucks.

It is a symptom of anxiety though so if you can stop worrying about it you will probably start to feel better.

Any other symptoms? Almost all improve when anxiety is lessened so just convice yourself that you are going to get better, It isn't lying because if you believe it it will come true.

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I doing better than i was when i posted this i was basically breaking down at the point i have horrible thoughts not as bad to where im crippled from them and but my vision is just very weird how i see everything which has been the main thing that bothers me now.

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Are there actual noticeable changes in vision like seeing afterimages and static or does it just seem like nothing looks right in a indescribable way?

If it is the latter it is another symptom of DR and you will almost certainly be fine soon, If it is the former it might take a little longer for you to heal but it will stil get better. Either way reducing your anxiety by natural means is the best way to make it go away right now.

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Welcome to the board

Are you doing any drugs still.,.. smoking weed or anything?

These first few months... you really have to avoid everything... drugs, smoking, drinking, coffee...

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after it first happen i smoked weed for awhile but it was miserable so had to stop cause i would get scarred to death basically when i smoked. I've stopped all drugs including cigs which i think might be why i feel like shit on top of everything else. i read about not drinking caffeine and such so I've stopped that to. my thoughts are less messed up as before i would constantly get caught on one thing and i would get sucked into it mostly i thought i was going to die i didn't know when it just always felt like it was soon and i felt like my dreams I've had were gonna be real cause i was having a lot of nightmares. my head is a lot better though not saying i don't get really f'd up thoughts just not as consuming i would say.

as for visual things in the morning its ok nothing but like floaters and everything is very bright. towards the end of the day it gets worse. i notice like lines like just a bunch of lines like a piece of paper but what ever i look at its very faint. the main thigns ive seen are little circle like bunched up when i close my eyes or focus on somthing very hard. its very wierd. and the thing that i think is the main thing that messes with me its like everything is cartoonish but not life is so realistic its fake. or if i focus on something the baground seems as a 2d image like a painting. i can see space around things. and finally i see like red static dots later on and in the dark and even in the light if i foucus on stuff. i try to keep my lights on. but seeing how im living with my parents my mom started asking why i leave them on. also i want to sleep but i cant or i feel like days just go by i dont notice change in time really.

should i tell my mom? i always want to when im rly down and ive had point when its 2am and im breaking down in curled up in scarred im fucked up forever. i know im not but it just gets bad. so should i tell her? and should i see a doctor cause i know she would want to go if i said something? it would probably make me feel better to know that this was the thing that was wrong coming from a doctor

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Is your mum laid back and supportive, or will she judge you and give cause you stress?

If she is cool, then tell her... talking to someone about it really helps, and she can help you with the doctors and stuff (make sure they don't put you on anti-depression or anti-pyscotic pills).

Remember that you do not have to do whatever a doctor says.... In this day and age, you can study your illness and what makes it better or worse... you can go in with alot of data and let the doctor know what you think the he/she should do.... The chances are, your doctor will no nothing about hppd... So you have to inform them and be firm.

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i would tell my parents about the visual disturbances but i think you dont have to say that they are drug related.

maybe drugs are only a trigger for HPPD and its gene related or whatever, another trigger could be Migraines for example.

who knows for sure maybe we would got these disturbances without ever taking drugs like a lot of other people.

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its best to tell them everything including that it was caused by drugs. My parents aren't laid back but neither they or my doctor judged me. It feels alot better when other people know that you are having a hard time.

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So I've been doing better. but then i get worse I have question i feel horrible but is it normal to constantly have ideas just crazy ones about whats going on with me. i feel like im nearing death, anything bout death like what happens after or such messes with me bad. and its mind bending....... I'm scarred

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Some people do experience that with DP, where you go into this mind maze and you cant really stop the thoughts, kinda like trippin, although it doesnt really happen to me. If youre gonna talk to your parents id recommend saying what i said which is that someone sold you laced weed (which really did happen to me.) It's a good excuse and youll be able to play it off a little better, hopefully spare em a little pain as well.

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