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Long timers, how did your HPPD evolve through time?


windscar
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Mine initially got worse and worse for like 3 or 4 months and then I started to see improvement. I feel like the mental side of things started easing up well before the visual side. These days I'm feeling pretty good mentally, aside from the depersonalization, and my visuals have gotten better but they're still pretty irritating.

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1994 - pre-hppd/warning signs (mild visuals, but only if I really looked for them). Contuniued with drugs.

1995 - something of a nervous breakdown after microdot (LSD) trip. Full hppd probably started then.Continued with drugs.

1996 - after a year of constant drug and alcohol abuse to numb the pain of hppd and depression, did another LSD trip and went into severe hppd. Quit drugs.

1997 - start of the hardest few years of my life. Full on depression and felt like I was on a strong acid trip, every day.

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2000 - depression went, anxiety lessened. Life seemed to begin again.

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2012 - visuals still intense, anxiety is there, but my life is not the disaster it was 1996-2000 where I felt like my brain was melting, both mentally and pysically.

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I first developed symptoms in 1981. I had 3 or 4 years of pure hell with DP/DR and severe visuals. It all seemed to improve steadily as I started doing something with my life other than feeling sorry for myself and mourning my previous self. 30 year on the visuals are still about if I look for them but I really think much of this is self fullfilling prophesy. You look for the visuals, spot them, and tension builds up. It's real but navel gazing nonetheless. As there may never be a cure for this, move on and accept. There are worse things in life.

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Oh I thought you meant it started at age 10. I was wondering what drugs you were taking at that age but now I think you meant it started 10 years ago.

Did the daydreaming episodes happen when you were close to falling asleep or anytime?

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