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I've been having anxiety attacks for the last couple of days about the prospect of becoming schizophrenic. I'm not delusional nor am I hearing things but I've sort of convinced myself that I'm hallucinating bugs flying through the air (honestly they probably are actually there) and I can't seem to shake that obsession. I'm coming home from university to surround myself with family and close hometown friends/ looking to get a Klonopin script. I know the addiction downside to using Klonopin but I truly, honest to god think I could benefit from it simply by how bad my anxiety has been recently. Hppd-wise I've actually been faring pretty well, no real improvement but I have reached what seems to be a baseline and I'm no longer constantly aware of it. This obsessive compulsive fear of psychosis is new though, and I need help.

Wish me luck friends.

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I know I am a broken record about klonopin, but is there anything else you could try first?

 

This seems to be something that might benefit CBT and just really chatting to your neuro about psychosis and schizophrenia

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I know I am a broken record about klonopin, but is there anything else you could try first?

This seems to be something that might benefit CBT and just really chatting to your neuro about psychosis and schizophrenia

I guess Klonopin is less of a priority than finding a non-ssri anti-depressant/anxiolytic. I just worry they'll try to put me on an antipsychotic or ssri. I know the downsides of ssris and as far as I can tell I'm not psychotic. Just horrible anxiety.
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Saw my doc today and spoke with a family friend mental health professional yesterday. Neither of them expressed any concern that I was actually experiencing the onset of psychosis.

My doctor prescribed a beta blocker to help with anxiety which I'm looking forward to trying.

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I have pysgosis to buth lucky i dont have anxiety like to most in the way been feeling buth i have a not typical aniexty buth bisede medication that i have used i have wait and sitting down wait my symptoms goes away buth didnt happend for the hardest symptoms i was keep fighting even i dont feel me good 2 years could accept my disease because i lived a normal live before those disease showed up so keep fighting until you reach a acceptual level the best 2 things you can do is healty food and lot of sports this two is my bigest relief i did start and stop with sport every time i did try again and did more and more and afther a times i stick to my routine and i feel for real this i feel realy hope for future even when its still hard from time to time when i act sport buth you wil geth your reward and somthimes more than you except and somthimes less then you except you will geth where you want one day if you start to stop waiting until it wil go over only with medication

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Unfortunately we get screwed when we mention HPPD to our primary physicians...

 

Never mention your past "substance abuse" to a pdoc.  They will automatically assume you are drug seeking and not prescribe anything worth a shit (as you are experiencing now).  Mention anxiety and you'll get a lifetime script for klonopin or whatever you want.  They will probably push xanax which you want to stay away from (short acting and not great for HPPD symptoms... good for panic attacks or severe anxiety attacks though... I keep a few "emergency" ones in the cupboard).  Suggest klonopin because you've heard it's "less addictive" and they'll probably be all over it.

 

I'll play devil's advocate here and recommend you push for a klonopin script.  See a different doctor... better yet get referred to a neurologist... it's all about how you take them.  Yes there is abuse potential there but unless benzo's were your "thing" back when you were doing drugs (probably not or you wouldn't have gotten HPPD) you should be OK as long as you get on a reasonable dose and use them as needed, not scheduled, and don't increase your dose.  A good starting dose is 0.5mg every 6-8 hours as needed and start with 0.25mg.  Clonazepam is the only truly across the board helpful medication to treat HPPD thus far and is a first line treatment for the disorder. 

 

You are not psychotic.  I've been in inpatient mental health for almost 15 years and I can tell you if you can say you think you might be psychotic you aren't.  Do NOT take antipsychotics. Other alternatives: you could try L-theanine if you want to go the holistic route (also good for inducing good sleep) which you could try first (also upping your magnesium intake might help but don't take so much you shit yourself), but I honestly think at least a short course of Klonopin along with some talk therapy would be good for you.  SSRI's can lead to a rollercoaster of pain like I'm currently going through.

 

From your previous post I see the condition is a new one to you.  I would suggest you get your anxiety under control and I think you will come out alright.  You only had one episode that caused the HPPD and your symptoms seems quite mild.  Get on some klonopin for the short term and I believe you have a good chance to heal.  If nothing else it hopefully won't get worse and you'll learn to ignore it. You just drew the short straw genetically (anyone else in your family have "perceptual issues" from "trippy" drug use?) and stop all drug use for good (marijuana included).  Those "sub-LSD drugs" in particular seem to be a motherfucker for giving people HPPD.  I personally know a kid who got HPPD from DMT and it went away completely.  If it were me in hindsight I would stay off anything psychoactive med wise except klonopin as needed. 

 

Keep us posted. 

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Unfortunately we get screwed when we mention HPPD to our primary physicians...

Never mention your past "substance abuse" to a pdoc. They will automatically assume you are drug seeking and not prescribe anything worth a shit (as you are experiencing now). Mention anxiety and you'll get a lifetime script for klonopin or whatever you want. They will probably push xanax which you want to stay away from (short acting and not great for HPPD symptoms... good for panic attacks or severe anxiety attacks though... I keep a few "emergency" ones in the cupboard). Suggest klonopin because you've heard it's "less addictive" and they'll probably be all over it.

I'll play devil's advocate here and recommend you push for a klonopin script. See a different doctor... better yet get referred to a neurologist... it's all about how you take them. Yes there is abuse potential there but unless benzo's were your "thing" back when you were doing drugs (probably not or you wouldn't have gotten HPPD) you should be OK as long as you get on a reasonable dose and use them as needed, not scheduled, and don't increase your dose. A good starting dose is 0.5mg every 6-8 hours as needed and start with 0.25mg. Clonazepam is the only truly across the board helpful medication to treat HPPD thus far and is a first line treatment for the disorder.

You are not psychotic. I've been in inpatient mental health for almost 15 years and I can tell you if you can say you think you might be psychotic you aren't. Do NOT take antipsychotics. Other alternatives: you could try L-theanine if you want to go the holistic route (also good for inducing good sleep) which you could try first (also upping your magnesium intake might help but don't take so much you shit yourself), but I honestly think at least a short course of Klonopin along with some talk therapy would be good for you. SSRI's can lead to a rollercoaster of pain like I'm currently going through.

From your previous post I see the condition is a new one to you. I would suggest you get your anxiety under control and I think you will come out alright. You only had one episode that caused the HPPD and your symptoms seems quite mild. Get on some klonopin for the short term and I believe you have a good chance to heal. If nothing else it hopefully won't get worse and you'll learn to ignore it. You just drew the short straw genetically (anyone else in your family have "perceptual issues" from "trippy" drug use?) and stop all drug use for good (marijuana included). Those "sub-LSD drugs" in particular seem to be a motherfucker for giving people HPPD. I personally know a kid who got HPPD from DMT and it went away completely. If it were me in hindsight I would stay off anything psychoactive med wise except klonopin as needed.

Keep us posted.

Thanks so much for the advice.

Despite being completely honest to my doctor about my previous drug use he still suggested Xanax or Valium. I think it's because I've succesfully ceased all drug use besides occasional alcohol in moderation; he doesn't look at me as a "drug user". I'm the one who put a damper on the benzo route because I know several people who have gone through so reeeaaaallly rough times with Xanax (ie. addiction, alienation, crime, withdrawal). I don't want to take either of those unless I'm completely debilitated. I considered suggesting Klonopin but he didn't bring that up and he said that adjustments can be made if the betablocker doesn't cut it. The drug I was prescribed, Propranolol, actually seemed to help when I took it last night. It doesn't decrease my visuals though it does "slow me down" a bit and I'm able to be a bit more rational in my thought processes. So while Xanax would make me forget, Propranolol makes me rationalize. My anxiety comes in waves, I'll go a few days feeling good about my condition/future then I'll get really down about it and not be able to get it out of my head.

The whole psychosis thing is beginning to blow over I think. I'm a bit of a hypochondriac (there are times I consider that I gave myself HPPD via placebo) and latch onto ailments pretty easily. For example I read a testimonial done by someone with schizophrenia where they said that they often hallucinate crows, and now I can't see a crow without doubting whether or not it's actually there, same with flies, same with peripheral disturbances. I'm doing a bit better today and I haven't even taken the anxiety med. I'll keep all of you posted. I want/am going to get through this and come out strong.

Edit: WuWei, when you say you're in inpatient Mental health do you mean that you're a patient, or that you work at a hospital? I'm honestly curious and if you don't want to answer please feel free to ignore. I have close family in "the business" and though I didn't necessarily grow up around people with severe psychotic illnesses, I'm more aware and knowledgeable than the vast majority of people my age (I'm 19)

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