Straight up advice required.

[C'mere]

Ok so, I've posted here before.. I haven't been on here in maybe a little over a year so obviously I could do with talking again.

 

I'm basically looking for some advice- where people think I should get meds or what I should do, hopefully some people can relate to what I'm going through.

 

Ok so, at the end of 2009 I took acid with my friend, I was going fine until I had what I think was a panic attack during the trip. I actually calmed and enjoyed the rest, though I was slightly on edge. I woke up the next morning fine and got on with everything. About a month later I was on my own in my parents house when I had a panic attack and went to A&E w/ heart palpitations.. I haven't been the same sense.

 

I'm attributing what I'm feeling now and since then to HPPD. Basically, I'm less anxious compared to when it first kicked in but now I feel.... numb, down a lot of the time, I have very low self esteem, I am happy and content one minute and the next I'm angry at something someone said yesterday and so down, I get scared of being in unfamiliar places, I am terrified of flying and being in strange countries.. if you asked my friends or family, they would say I'm fine.. I cover it well and I have improved a lot since it happened but I'm still now right. I don't know if I'm depressed or anxious or what I should do. Every night I'm having lucid nightmares where I wake up and then I can see static and different images in front of my eyes. I'm completely ruling out telling family or friends. I'm really just looking for advice. I used to be laid back.. I'm sick of feeling so muddled and constantly thinking of ridiculous possibilities and outcomes and having a constantly racing mind. I'm in no way at peace.

 

Seeing as how I have improved a lot since 2009- i.e a lot less panicked and hardly any panic attacks these days.. Do I need to visit a doctor? I am scared of trying medication because I don't want to get even more messed up. Can anyone give me some advice? Does this sound like depression or anxiety? I actually think I could be much worse off and I am very thankful for everything I have but I can't help but feel like my life could be so much better.

 

I would really appreciate any help! Thanks a million

[Jay1]

Hi, as it sounds like anxiety is your main problem, i would target that.

 

Thankfully, there are a number of well established and quite safe options. Maybe chat to your doctor about Gabapentin:

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gabapentin

 

Your doctor will probably try to put you on an SSRI anti depressant, but that is generally considered a bad move, for hppd.

 

Good luck, Jay

[ferret]

Your symptom set is simmilar to what mine was however mine cleared up (mostly) within months. I useally think its best to avoid medication but since you've been struggling for three years it might be time to discuss that possibility with a doctor. Have you stayed sober, eaten healthy, and exercised for an extended period since you started having symptoms? In my case I saw great improvement when I began to think positively and just focus on relaxing all day, mindset can make a big difference when treating a psychological disorder