Sam93

I used the Silk Road before, and while it works I don't really trust it any more, and I got a letter from my ISP stating that illegal activity had been detected or something, whether that was the Silk Road (not sure how because of the encryption) or the mass amounts of torrents I was downloading I'll never know.

 

I've also ordered online from overseas pharmacies prescription free which also works. But it is much better to try and get a prescription.

 

Definitely check out Diclazepam and Etizolam, they're both legal benzos (well, etizolam is a bit different but works the same) if you need a supply of Benzos. Etizolam and Diclazepam migitate my symptoms a lot.

No word yet mate and no change on order status either, something is definitely off.

Anyway on a more positive note I'm looking forward to reading your article!

Yeah I've done all the research I could from the material available, I'm not too worried because Benzos are relatively safe chemicals in responsible doses, addiction aside etc. It's not too much of a 'dodgy' analogue as its just Valium with 2 chloro's on the side chain, and based on reports it seems to have atypical benzo effects with people describing it as being very similar to Diazepam, no side effects other than what would be expected.

There have been no reports on the duration of effect yet though but I would've thought it would have a pretty long half life.

Only testing it out because my HPPD seems to respond exceptionally well to Benzos. Plus I had £5 worth of points and a 20% off voucher code from a research chemical vendor so it was almost free.

Sorry to double post but I'm on my ipad and it won't let me edit my posts.

Don't know if anyone's familiar with benzo binding affinities, but I'm not, so if anyone could tell me what the effects are likely to be based upon the GABAA subtype affinities that would be great, they are:

α1 2.51 ±0.25

α2 3.42 ±0.19

α3 4.02 ±0.19

α5 5.13 ±0.19

Indeed, I like the fact these little chemicals keep popping up, but that's cos I have no respect for pharmaceutical companies haha, we'll most.

I've ordered some of this anyway, should be here tomorrow so we shall see if it does any good.

No change on order status for me yet either, oh dear.

Ahh interesting! Novel BZD's seem to be popping up like weeds these days.

Do you have a link to the user experiences?

Yeah, these pharmaceutical companies are really bypassing drug laws these days haha. Looks an interesting one though, the structure reminds me of Clonazepam if memory serves me right. Likely to have active metabolites though I should think.

There's only one report I came across so far from some guy who simply said it was 'better than 1mg Etizolam' not really worth a link until I find more! I can vouch for etizolam though, I have had total symptom remission from 2mg Etizolam, although it seems to have seretogenic properties as it shows tricyclic antidepressant activity in the brain.

Interesting stuff nonetheless.

There's a new Legal Benzodiazepine coming out from research chemical vendors which I thought I'd share, not sure if I'm allowed to talk about it but I've spoke about Etizolam and that seemed to be ok.

Anyway, Diclazepam is the short name for 7-chloro-5-(2-chlorophenyl)-1-methyl-1,3-dihydro-2H-1,4-benzodiazepin-2-one and can be considered both to be the 2'-chloro analgoue of diazepam or the 1-methyl analgoue of Delorazepam.

There's only a few reports of use on the Internet but its interesting nonetheless. Should in theory have a pretty long half life. My HPPD responds well to Benzos so just thought I'd share.

https://www.buyresearchchemicals.co.uk/diclazepam.html

Yeah, we should be able to tell if its legit pretty easy. Not sure why they decided to make a sublingual solution though as little is known of the bioavailability or even if it can be absorbed sublingually, for all we know it could have an active metabolite thus requiring first pass metabolism. But meh, if it doesn't work sublingually ill just try drinking some! Wonder what solvent they've used, unless its water soluble.

Ah yes, I did mean acetylcholine, my mistake! I was reading about it earlier and my brain is often too cognitively impaired to take in all the information from research papers and studies haha. What I found interesting from a study is that it stated the signal transduction cascade of the cholinergic pathway may act synergistically with that of the NMDA receptor pathway, whose activation is a prerequisite for cortical plasticity. This may account for some of the more long term effects of Coluracetam administration, along with the fact it seems to cause long term changes in the choline uptake system.

As acetylcholinesterase is responsible for the breakdown of acetylcholine then administering an acetylcholinesterase inhibitor could potentiate coluracetams effects, I did a search and THC is a reversible acetylcholinesterase inhibitor which is interesting, as well as Caffeine. Don't know if an inhibitor would be beneficial though as the broken down acetylcholine into choline is going to get re up taken anyway but, just an idea.

To be honest, I didn't know there was any plasticity in the visual cortex, but hey!

Damn, talking about all this neurology just made me think 'are these chemicals inside a wet lump of meat really responsible for our experience of reality' haha my philosophical mind.

Haha, enjoy! What series are you on?

Anyone had any luck with anything?  I take a B complex every day and it seems to help with brain fog and give me more energy. I also take Vitamin D year round except for summer and the odd multivitamin and fish oil tablet.  I've also tried L-Theanine and it helps deepen sleep (also good for the caffeine jitters).  Pretty expensive though. 

 

I'm thinking of trying NAC?  Mainly just looking for some help in the cognitive department, although this constant "glitchy" stuff is unnerving and can go away any time it wants

NAC works for me, definite improvement in concentration, less lethargy and head pressure etc.

Magnesium is also very good, I take fish oil too for omega 3. L-theanine and L-tyrosine both have positive reports. Valerian root can help with anxiety if that's a problem for you.

Yeah we'll see, we might get a nice surprise.

Yeah I'll definitely have to order from somewhere more reputable too. We should be able to notice some effect if it isn't bunk and just hasn't worked I guess!

Colours look very vibrant to me already but that could be some excitation issue which it could indeed level out. Should we be taking a choline supplement with it like alpha GPC or whatever it's called?

Yeah we'll see, we might get a nice surprise.

Yeah I'll definitely have to order from somewhere more reputable too. We should be able to notice some effect if it isn't bunk and just hasn't worked I guess!

Colours look very vibrant to me already but that could be some excitation issue which it could indeed level out. Should we be taking a choline supplement with it like alpha GPC? I know the amount of choline synthesised is determined by high affinity choline uptake anyway as far as I'm aware.

One well-supported function of acetylcholine (ACh) in cortex is increased responsiveness to sensory stimuli - this looks good for DP

ound that repeated stimulation of the basal forebrain, a primary source of ACh neurons, paired with presentation of a tone at a specific frequency, resulted in remapping of the auditory cortex to better suit processing of that tone - just thought this was pretty interesting

Ive hit the six month mark and im still depersonalized, and my visuals are worse than when I first contracted hppd. What the fuck am I supposed to do. My brain is fucked. My moods are up and down constantly. Im doing everything I can to heal and nothing is working. Is there still hope that I will get better? I have no idea.

I feel you mate, the depersonalization is awful.

There is definitely still hope you'll recover, there have been stories of people naturally recovering anywhere between 3 months and 5 years, perhaps you'd like to read the success stories section and some of the posts in the introductions forums, you'll not only see how many have naturally recovered in that timeframe but how life does get easier even if this doesn't go away.

Even without a natural recovery there is the pharmacological route of trying out Keppra, Sinemet, Clonidine, Flunarizine, Lamictal, Clonazepam etc. along with supplements. Also me and another member are trying out a possible medication Coluracetam very soon which might inspire some hope in you, so watch out for that.

Hope is far from lost yet my friend, but I believe in being a realist, so for now, I'd recommend finding a way to live your life with the burden of HPPD. I know it's hard but you will develop better coping mechanisms over time, and there are many people on the forums who are into their decades with HPPD who will tell you that quality of life does improve a lot.

So yeah, have a good read through the success stories section and the introductions section, that always gives me hope when I feel I need it.

Good idea for a poll, I've always wondered why some do and some don't, as its obviously not an anxiety triggered thing for everyone as I don't suffer with much anxiety yet am dissociated to the other side of the solar system.

Ahh yes I totally forgot about first pass metabolism bypass! So that, in theory, makes it even more unlikely to interact. Great!

I think we'll both get the stuff around the same time, as we both just ordered and are almost neighbors. Shouldn't be more than 2 weeks, probably within a week I presume. Did you also get free shipping? I thought it was a bit strange: free international shipping. Maybe some kind of promotional feature because they're new.

Indeed, if both of us have good experiences, that would be extremely good news! But even if only one of us has a positive reaction, that'll be great news nonetheless.

Anyway, I'm still going to order from both NSN and Vantage once they have it available as well. Just for conformation purposes. I mean, should this not work, then the possibility can't be ruled out that it was bunk. And seeing as NSN has a decent track record, it'll be a fairly reliable way to confirm whether it is the substance or the subject.. But that's all if-then clauses that may not be necessary should it work. If it works, then I'll sell all my stuff and order a pound or a kilo. Also, I'm considering to have some other people in my vicinity test it.. Voluntarily of course.   I also know some people who still do psychedelics, so I'm curious to see whether they'd be willing to try it in a combo. And a relative of mine also has DP/DR/Anxiety issues (non-HPPD), so I'm wondering whether it could help him too.

Back to watching Fringe though.. This excitement is making me anxious, and I really need to cool it down a notch, haha. So far it is indeed also one of the best series I've seen. And there are so many episodes! I'll be able to be somewhat occupied for a while now

Yeah I got free shipping also, was surprised they actually shipped overseas! I'm half expecting an email saying they're out of stock though seeing as it says extremely limited supply or something.

I'm not getting my hopes up too high though, but it'll be a really nice surprise if it isn't bunk! Thing is, if it doesn't do anything for our HPPD how will we know if its bunk, or just hasn't worked? o_O One of my HPPD symptoms is brightening and enhancement of colour anyway, so seeing as this enhances colour too I may end up blinded haha!

Yeah the acting in Fringe is great, I love the sci fi / physics mix too! I haven't got the concentration to watch much TV now though, should really look into a supplement for that!

But yeah, if it does work then ill order a big quantity too, especially if it works for DP/DR!

OK great! So you should be safe then.

Yeah that's why I wouldn't see how they could interfere either, but I was thinking indeed more of possible non-cerebral organ interaction (liver/kidneys). I thought the same thing about the water and a pipette.. From what I read it should taste absolutely vile. Unlike any other substance.. So that should be somewhat indicative if it's just placebo fluid or not

I can't wait to try it either! Damnit I'm overexcited now. As if some switch flipped in my brain and current is just zapping all over the place.

Anyway, I'm gonna try and leave it for what it is now, let my brain cool down, and just continue watching Fringe. Thankfully I finally found a tv-show that I'm surprisingly interested in, so that'll mitigate the waiting. Baby-steps, right? At least now it's waiting for the product to arrive, and not merely for it to be available.

Cheers!

Yeah, the mechanism of action wouldn't interact I shouldn't think, they could be metabolised by the same liver enzyme but again this wouldn't cause any problems short term, from what I've read most racetams exit the body unchanged I believe. Since its sublingual then this bypasses first pass metabolism anyway does it not? With the added benefit of very rapid absorption.

Anyway, I'm excited to get my hands on that lovely bottle. If both of us have any sort of positive result then that is extremely good news . Delivery should be a while yet since mine's coming from the USA to the uk but, at least we've sourced some!

I love Fringe too, went through a week of watching every single episode pre HPPD, one of the best series I've ever watched.

Nope I'm med free aside from the occasional Benzo! cant wait to try it out, as long as we haven't been scammed and get a bottle of water and a pipette haha!

I can't see why you'd have any problems with keppra, pre synaptic calcium channel blocking wouldn't interfere with choline uptake enhancement I wouldn't have thought, not sure if there's any other active metabolites of colur though or even how it's metabolised but in theory it should be safe.

Haha isn't that a coincidence, great minds think alike and all that!

I've ordered some too, if its a scam I can live with a small loss like that!

Looked on his eBay noopept page which was last updated in April saying Coluracetam arriving next week, so it's been a while! Also found another supplier from China but the minimum order is 1KG and you have to request a quote, not sure if it's dodgy or not though.

Also there's an American supplier that claims to sell in quantities starting from 10mg, although no pricing listed : http://acccorporation.com/api0009805.aspx

Also a big list of suppliers here, again none with prices listed except 6000 usd/kg, all Chinese but requested quotes for smaller ammounts just for fun

http://www.lookchem.com/Coluracetam/

Also, check this out, 60 doses of 20mg sublingual Coluracetam for 45 usd :S not sure if legit!

http://www.ceretropic.com/coluracetam-sublingual-solution/

Hey man,

It's good to hear you still have managed to get your dream job and obviously hold down a successful relationship.

Can I ask if you still / ever did suffer with DP/DR (Dissociation)?

Well. Where to start....

When it was 16 I had a magic mushroom trip that landed me in the hospital.

It warped my young mind. Now I'm 28 and hppd is an all to real hell that I have been dealing with ever since that fateful night.

It wasn't until an hour ago that I even heard of hppd. Or snowy vision,. Of all the times I've been to the emergency room and doctors offices NOT ONE OF THEM knew what's was talking about. I thought I was mental. Well I guess I kinda am. You are all now my brothers and sisters. It is such a relief to know I'm not suffering alone. So many years of not knowing answers. Just had to type the right things into google. I'm somewhat at ease. It's 5 am. Going to attempt to sleep again.

Seriously I can't believe this is a real medical condition and not my personal hell. It's our hell. Lets make the best of it.

I will be contributing to the board often and look forward to chatting with you all

Kellen

 

Hey Kellen, welcome to the forums!

 

Can I ask if you suffer from DP/DR (Depersonalization/Derealization) as well as your visual symptoms? 

 

-Sam

I'm glad I inspire some hope in you However, you shouldn't just take my word for my theories, as I have both cognitive dysfunction and no education (seriously man, I didn't even finish high-school). I do however try my best, but I have no ways of confirming anything aside from experimentation (hence my enthusiasm to do so). For all I know, everything I've ever theorized, or thought to understand about HPPD could be conjecture

BTW I thought that TLE also encompassed feelings of a foreign entity/presence? I have no such perceptions, yet it might provide a reason for why some of us have this mild surreal paranoia of sorts. Again, just conjecture.

And yeah the thought that a single substance can fuck you up so badly, in hindsight, makes me feel very fragile. Quite the humbling experience.

On the other hand though, that also leaves the possibility that a single substance can unfuck you. From the beginning I've more or less thought: "Well, if a substance caused this, there'll be a substance to cure it."

But man.. 25B-Nbome? Idk what to say.. Kind of sucks that there's a lack of research into it indeed. I haven't seen brain scans of psychedelic states (or well, not consciously observing them), so maybe it can be that with many/most/all drugs can cause the brain to have a Christmas party?

And indeed, in theory... Ohh the theories! Such insubstantial things they are.. Let's hope they'll confirm into evidence. However, I see no reason why the inducing substance should factor the possibilities of Coluracetam's efficacy. The only thing that I could imagine, is that HPPD induced by anti-cholinergics or muscarinics could respond better. Hell I don't know nearly enough about LSD's or MDMA's pharmacology to even start speculating. In any case, I'd say without further knowledge about it, we all stand an equal chance really.

I just really hope this works! Not just for myself, but that it will work for others as well! Imagine that; a universal treatment or cure for HPPD. One thing that is also very interesting to note though, is that Coluracetam apparently has long lasting effects (up to days), which may indicate long-term changes to synapses, neurons, chemistry, whatever. Again, just speculating here, but this could indicate that if it works, it might actually have the potential to be a true cure. instead of a treatment. Some other people discussed the potential long-term neuromodular (is that a word? it is now) properties of Coluracetam, but I totally forgot where I read that and what was discussed.

Ohh.. I wrote this like 3 hours ago and found I didn't post it just now. Dunno where I was heading with it.

Cheers.

Yeah, but research and trial and error are going to lead to a treatment or even better, a cure someday! That's all we can do really, make educated guesses and pretty much guinea pig ourselves, safely of course.

Yeah TLE can cause dissociation, the feeling you describe, even visual distortions and hallucinations. After reading a little more though some other symptoms include scratching your head, removing items of clothing and sexual feelings and behaviour, so I won't go too deep into the temporal lobe idea unless us HPPDers start wandering down the street naked, scratching our heads and pursuing women haha.

Yeah, shows you just how powerful psychedelics really are! I don't think anyone knows about the true nature of LSD's mechanism of action either, I'm sure I read that LSD is pretty much out your brain in half an hour and the rest is just a cascading chemical reaction? I may well have imagined that though.

indeed I've seen the reports of it lasting days after administration too, it must have a very interesting mechanism of action. What gives me hope is the reports of people feeling more present, more alive and more connected, quite exciting for DP! The reports of people saying colours were so vivid they could almost taste them and feel them seems a little odd though, sounds kind of like Synesthesia which would mean communication across different brain areas that otherwise shouldn't be happening, unless they were just exaggerating a little.

Fingers crossed on this one anyway!

Cool man, you have reduced your symptoms, thats great to hear!

You tell your visual snow reduced, did you also had closed eye visions? Did it reduced because of the keppra? or is it the klonopin.

The anxiety you feel i understand very well, sometimes i look into someone's eyes and i know i have a meaningless face, thats what disturb's me the most. Its not spontainious anymore. also the fact, people can all of a sudden turn into "puppets" scares the shit outta me.

 

I am taking lamotrigine, isnt this the same as keppra? The sedative shit is most likely because of the klonopin, in combination with other meds , when the klono kicks in i want to go to bed, and when im out of bed, my anxiety begins again, so i take another klono. It is fucking not normal.

 

I still want to quit klonopin, but i need something what keeps the visual snow in the air, and when my eyes are closed away.

Hey man,

Have you tried magnesium? That reduces my snow quite a bit and is also very calming.

Yes bro, first i get hppd i was like a zombie. Extreme guilt, the only sense i was feeling. I know well this condition but i am sure you will be dp/dr free too. My medication was body building. I was feeling very tired but i never missed a day in 3 months and slowly i started to feel like old me. Again i am sure you will be ok too but i cant give any promise about visuals 

So your DP went away in 3 months from first onset? Well it gives me hope that at least DPDR can go away. I'm tired of feeling like I'm in a dream and the outside world feeling less real. Getting some emotions back though and it's been almost 4 months so far so maybe there's hope!

Yeah I was thinking of starting bodybuilding again, something to focus on and that requires discipline can only help.

Ah, I can live with the visuals, if the dpdr went away I'd consider myself cured.

Hi there,

Well there's a legal Benzo where I live called Etizolam, which is technically not a benzodiazepine but a thienodiazepine, basically where the benzene ring of the molecule has been replaced by a thienophene ring.

From what I've read it is more selective to the alpha 2 subtype of the GABAA receptor, which means it should be more potent as an anxiolytic.

I have only tried it once but in EEG scans it has shown characteristic effects of tricyclic antidepressants, and has been reported to increase serotonin levels or possibly even act as a serotonin releasing agent, although this isn't confirmed i don't believe.

The fact it shows tricyclic antidepressant effects which means possible serotonin increase makes the therapeutic benefit in HPPD somewhat negligible I feel. Although increasing serotonin has helped some of our members so it depends on the person I guess.

Some interesting things ive found are:

No cognitive defects were reported in a 3 week dosage of 0.5mg a day compared to placebo, which is unusual for a benzo.

When multiple doses of etizolam were administered compared to lorazepam, lorazepam caused down regulation of alpha1 GABA sites whereas etizolam caused an increase in alpha2 GABA subtypes, almost reverse tolerance.

No tolerance to the anticonvulsant effect of etizolam was reported with long term administration compared to other Benzos.

Quote: 1. Patients with generalized anxiety disorder were either treated with Etizolam (0.5 mg), Alprazolam (0.5 mg), or Bromazepam (3 mg) twice a day. While all three drugs retained their effectiveness over 2 weeks, etizolam actually started to become more effective than the other benzos from to 2 weeks to 4 weeks (reverse tolerance in a way). The researchers also note antidepressant activity in etizolam not seen in the other two drugs tested.

This should mean in theory that Etizolam should cause less addiction and dependence, and due to reverse tolerance effect actually increases alpha2 GABAA subtypes, making more of the receptors available I believe.

It's an interesting thienodiazepine nonetheless.

One thing I will say is that the time I did try Etizolam i felt a lot more normal, more sedated than I usually would but a lot more normal. Cognition was actually improved dramatically, and it reduced visual snow by around 75 percent from a 1mg dose. Interestingly it didn't affect trails and tracers (possibly due to seretogenic activity) but completely removed after images. There was a definite lessening of DP/DR too, although I noticed colours looked more vivid on Etizolam for some reason.

This may be an excellent alternative to Clonazepam for some sufferers. Main metabolite has a half life of just under 9 hours.

my DP/DR and anxiety totally cured in 2 months without any medication but i did not see a tiny bit improvement in visual symptoms in 1 year.

 

i am dp/dr and anxiety free right now but at the same time i dont have an acceptance for my visuals. i am still believing that they will dissappear. thinking too much about this issue sometimes may cause a sadness but again not anxiety.

Man, I wish my DP/DR had disappeared. Losing your sense of reality and your emotions is losing what makes us human. Mine seems to be improving slowly. Worst symptom aside from the blunted emotions is feeling like I don't have a body. DP/DR really is a physical sensation and not just a mental one, if you understand what I mean, maybe that's just me haha.

I do miss my emotions, ironic but yeah haha.