Anticonvulsants help?

[j0yxxx]

So i just relapsed after being sober for 6 months , i smoked some weed and drank and i didn’t notice affects but when i come down i got the hppd symptoms and they were the strongest they have ever been. 

Ive had this for either 1 or 2 years now and when i was in my addiction it was livable, my substance of choice was benzos so i was pretty barred out all time although ive heard some people say benzos make it worse.

Anyways, while i was in treatment coming off benzos i was prescribed Tegretol for seizures and phenobarbital for delirium and i found some tegretol today that i never took in treatment after doing some research and hearing it helped people so i took some with vistaril and it has helped me feel much less anxious and the Tegretol has made the visuals way less intense, tracers are almost non existent still some though, and visual snow is only rlly noticeable when i focus on it. Just wanted to post this here to help anyone else because it sometimes makes me really terrified when im driving and last night when i was on the phone with someone they kept repeating the same thing and i felt like i was hard coming up on acid they looked at me like i was crazy and said ill text you (they never did lol) i think i came up cuz i was like “am in a loop right now or some shit.” 

 

[Jay1]

I've occasionally fucked up and fallen off the wagon, sometimes got lucky and had no lingering issues, sometimes made myself much worse (short term and long term)... Best thing to do is learn from it and then try to get back on the wagon and stay on it. Worst thing to do is beat yourself up about being a fallible human being, we all are.