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HPPD and TBI; A bad mix of drugs, mental illness, and a concussion


Paunchymouse
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Hey guys, I am a 21 year old male. I have struggles with mental illness since a teenager and was sent off to a wilderness camp when I was young. I first got HPPD after taking only two tabs of acid alone. I was 17 years old. I had already abused lsd as well as a lot of dxm. I had also used any drugs I could get my hands on. Anyways, my HPPD symptoms were only bad in the dark, or if I did not get enough sleep. I tried to stop doing drugs, but could not. I was young anyways. Down the road, I had two really bad xanax binges. Both lasted about 3 months each. During these binges I would take acid a couple times through out. I would take xanax on the comedown. I also took MDMA, DMT, Ketamine, Shrooms, and Amphetamines. I pretty much would do as much drugs as I could. This put me in a mental hospital and got me kicked out of the house. My parents let me back in btw. Anyways, August of 2021, 1 year ago, I got a concussion. This concussion made my HPPD symptoms way worse. I never fully healed and developed Post concussion syndrome. I got another concussion a few months later. Now a year later I am still dealing with PCS and HPPD very bad. I have been having very bad thoughts. I feel like I am going crazy. I have a bunch of pressure in my head at all times, except for early in the morning. I have flashing lights in my vision, and everything looks like it has static. The mix of the HPPD and Brain Injury has changed me as a person. I have been taking B2, Magnesium, and Fish oil. I am finally off of paroxetine, as it made the pressure in my head worse. Thanks for letting me rant. I feel so alone. My mental illness has been so bad recently and I have no one to relate to.  

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