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what the fuuuck just happened


2muchmandy
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When I was blinking I got an after image but...not of anything id looked at or seen. Then I wondered what it was...then it went blood red. A large blood red square in my vision. It went so dark ir wasnt see through. I sat down and it began to fade slowly. That was horrifying. What was that?

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I'm not sure if I've had that but I've had some weird shit happen like that but now I've learned that they generaly don't happen again and I find them interesting rathher than terrifying like i used to.

One weird thing that still happens once in a while but not as much as It used too is when I close my eyes I still see what i saw with them open but with some differences like my mind tries to imagine what I'd see if my eyes were open but it fucks up and puts some random shit in there sometimes like a picture on the wall that really isn't in that room but i have seen recently. Its just there for a 1/4 of a second after I close my eyes It doesn't really happen anymore but has anyone else experienced this.

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Everyone worries about dumb shit when they hve HPPD, here are some other things that you feared that I'm sure you have since forgotten.

http://hppdonline.com/index.php?/topic/1030-dark-negative-spot-in-vision-when-i-blink/

http://hppdonline.com/index.php?/topic/1015-slow-frame-rate-afterimages/

http://hppdonline.com/index.php?/topic/969-kinda-losing-it-a-bit-here/

http://hppdonline.com/index.php?/topic/851-worst-symptom-thus-far/

http://hppdonline.com/index.php?/topic/907-just-as-u-think-ur-winning/

http://hppdonline.com/index.php?/topic/981-tingling-zapping-sensation-in-the-brain/

All these symptoms had you freaking out but you are still sane and haven't gone blind. We've made it through a lot. HPPD isn't going to beat us now as long as we stay positive and don't do anything too stupid.

http://hppdonline.com/index.php?/topic/886-last-nights-monster-of-a-flashback/

I'm sure this ^ experience was way worse than that blotch but it was 2 months ago and you are still fine. Worrying only slows your recovery.

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True but in all fairness the slowed frame rate etc was actually trails which are now in full bloom. The point is noone else has had a large red square develop and then slowly fade. The fact that is unique to me is worrying. Hppd comes with a huuuuge amount of hypercondria. But the fact this for eg. Shares so many symptoms with retinal detachment is worrying. I got ann apointment with a neuro so il see. I deffo want xanax or something to kill these stupid thoughts I get

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I've never had a lot of after-images but real early on I looked at a light and had a big blotch (not sure if it was red or purple) consume a large portion of my vision before fading for what felt like two minutes but might have been less. I get after-images from nothing sometimes but they never last very long at all as long as I look around them.

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Dude I wish you wouldn't worry so much. Kinda recently I've discovered that most of my anxiety was just negative thoughts that I made up for some reason...it was in my head. I'm not saying that your anxiety is made up shit in your head; it (probably) isn't. But it was for me, and thinking positively has made all the difference for me. Lately I spend probably less than 10 minutes a day focusing/adressing my visuals, and I'm convinced I'll at least make a partial recovery by the end of summer. Remember, your still young and your brain is still developing and since you've been 100% sober, you should make a full recovery. For me, HPPD only affects me as much as I let it. I would at least go to a doc and get some sort of benzo script that you can use occasionally if I were you because it sounds to me from some of your forum posts that fear and anxiety have been consuming you. But I'm a different person than you, and my case is pretty mild, so anyways...

That does sound pretty scary, but some weird shit has happened to me, too. Once in the morning 15 min after waking up, my snow (which at the time wasn't even snow but just straight geometric patterns) turned all hexagonal and got 10x bigger and then got smaller and changed back to circles in like 10 seconds. It freaked the shit out of me for like the next week.

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My hppd is super mild aswell and on the day to day I dont worry atal. It doesnt bother me in the slightest...then something like that happens. I have a neuro this week so il get some xanax or something and see how it goes. Im just pissed off and scared im still getting new symptoms after 4 months. Some people have been drinking and so on and they havnt been getting worse, why me. Spent the last 2 weeks in a great mood happy as hell and got trails

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