brake

Day 8 on abilify and I had to stop taking it on the 9th day because I took theraflu and then I was having uncontrollable rage attacks which I never had before. It also increased my anxiety and visuals. It was good in decreasing depersonalization and derealization as well as increasing prefrontal cortex activity but that's it. I also became way more clumsy than usual and I'm already a clumsy person. Abilify also made me more tired and sleepy. I think for the first time I saw my cigar moving around (probably my first non psychedelic hallucination). My doctor said it's okay if I don't take it anymore. After like 5 days I took 1 mg of xanax and it was amazing how it chilled me out and reduced my visual symptoms as well. I'm gonna go back on the buspirone again because that has been proven to be safe and effective for me. I might try lamictal or latuda next although I am terrified of taking antipsychotics because they seem to permanently increase visuals whereas buspirone and anti-seizure meds actually decrease them. But damn the increase in anxiety itself was annoying!

19 minutes ago, Spartan said:

Been on for a year and a half 

6 mils approx 4 months 

I really need to get some help with supervised gradual taper. 

Thankyou 

 

Have you seen a permanent decrease in symptoms with your high dosage?

12 hours ago, Spartan said:

One specially yes tho only a gp.

My neuro psyche is on leave. 

These meds are strictly monitored with gps

At hospital now.

 

6 mgs is a huge dose!!!! Wish you the best of luck brother!!

Did the doctors tell you why they decided to cut you off completely?

Hey all... new article is out on HPPD that I wanted to share with everybody:

9 years after an acid trip, I still have anxiety-inducing visual distortions that only stop when I sleep

10 hours ago, Hall89 said:

It is! Yeah, it's crazy! But it happened to the people in the study as well. But this will be my last resort, i still have Keppra Gabapentin, etc to try. But living a life with all the visual symptoms, which are at a 10/10 for me on top of all the non-visual ones is a death sentence for me, since every day is pure torture.

Yeah bro this sucks!

On 1/31/2021 at 6:54 PM, GammaKnife said:

I hear you man. Benzos definitely don't seem like the way to go, but a lot of people here seem to talk about Clonazepam being effective? I really don't know what the deal is though. I've been taking ashwaganda root capsules for the last week and it's really helped to get me back into a normal headspace in terms of counteracting anxiety, help sleeping, and not being distracted by visual disturbances. Honestly it's a godsend, because I was really struggling. I do worry if the effects are placebo-based, or if it will lose its potency at some point down the road. There seems to be a lot of other herbal medicines for reducing anxiety and difficult states of mind, which has been my biggest problem for the last month – I'll do more research and see what's effective.

Klonopin, xanax and valium seem to be effective for me but I take them sporadically as to never develop a high tolerance, addiction or withdrawals. I like to say they create a partial "vacation" from HPPD. I don't know what these guys are talking about benzos creating hell in their life but I believe them. There is some documentary about people becoming terribly addicted to benzos.

Day 2 on abilify after being off buspirone and dekapote for about 2 weeks with no noticeable withdrawals. After hearing about my paranoia the doctors strongly recommended it. Did not make my HPPD or Visual Snow better or worse but I seem to be less scared and paranoid. I do feel like a zombie a bit. I will stay away from the other anti-psychotics but I saw some people posting positive videos on YouTube about their experience with abilify so I'll give it a try.

1 hour ago, Hindy112 said:

I think with HPPD the percentage for getting side effects goes up by a lot.

Why do you think so? Is it because we are more sensitive?

On 5/5/2023 at 3:43 PM, Hall89 said:

The chances of getting that is lower than 1%.

Dude a small percentage get serious side effects from Gabapentin. Also a small percentage get HPPD and visual snow, I don't want to try my luck again. With Gabapentin and Buspirone, I had trouble breathing, hives and rashes. Gabapentin also gave me partial ED. Which is very unfortunate because I felt like it was stabilizing my brain and making me feel better. What's interesting to me is that although benzos and anti-seizure medications do help a lot, I feel like they aren't specifically targeted for HPPD and/or visual snow. I am that 1%!!!! lol

17 hours ago, Hall89 said:

So, got on Lamotrigine about 2 months after my onset and it saved my life, because it took away the non-visual symptoms, hallucinations, tunnel vision and stabilized the others some. The past two months these have started to surface again and i see my life coming to an end. I'm in the process of increasing from 200 mg to 300 mg in hope of buying me some more time, i also take some benzo to temporarily help me. 

 

Anyways, since i responded so well to Lamotrigine, do you guys believe that i will do it to Keppra as well? I'm dead serious when i say that i will not live a life with full blown HPPD, every day was torture with it, especially because of the out of control 10/10 anxiety.

No idea because I had serious side effects from Gabapentin but I'm fine on Dekapote. I don't want to try Lamictal because I heard there are chances of a serious rash as well.

15 hours ago, Beefol said:

Thank you for answering @brake!

 

All your symptoms decreased around 80% or just the tinnitus?

Just the tinnitus. The other stuff did decrease but not as much.

On 1/8/2023 at 12:41 PM, ... said:

Happy New Year everyone!

I want to ask if others experience light sensitivity? This is perhaps a secondary symptom, for me anyway, that I attribute to over stimulation of the endocrine system via HPPD. I am not actually sure that the endocrine system is actually stimulated since HPPD is perceptual, however! I would like to know what others experience or know in this area. I have structured my own  life around limiting light, living with natural exposure without electric and basically going to bed with the chickens. 

Kaleidoscope here....

Yessss I have a lot of light sensitivity! Sucks! It did get better over the years. Maybe around 40% better.

Yes! I had really bad tinnitus in the first like 4 years. I even got a brain MRI with dye contrast in the auditory canal and passed an evaluation by a neurologist. It's been 10 years since onset of HPPD, visual snow, tinnitus, etc and I can finally say that it has decreased around 80%. The conclusions from my MRI are that my brain is unremarkable! Yeah right! lol

4 hours ago, Hall89 said:

Because SSRI's and many other antidepressants binds to the 5HT2a receptor, just like the recreational drugs that can cause this, that is, psychedelics, cocaine and THC. These psychiatric drugs also possess hallucinogetic properties, >1% actually get hallucinations as a side effect from SSRI's. So antidepressants can in rare cases cause HPPD by itself, so it's not wierd that it worsens it for some.

Yes that's why I try to stay away from these substances and only like GABA and endorphin inducing activities and substances. Buspirone affects serotonin but is classified as a anxiolytic instead of a anti-depressant but it kind of makes you less depressed which seems like it's also an anti-depressant in a way. Either ways, it is one of the well tolerated pharmaceuticals.

I also had depersonalization, derealization and tinnitus but that decreased between 50 to 90% over the years. I found CBD to be one of the more helpful supplements.

HPPD Specialists Directory (Berlin, Amsterdam, Boston, Brisbane, London, California, Portland, Florida, Austin, Philadelphia and others)

Dr. Steven Locke (Boston)

I also did yoga consistently for like 5 years because I heard it permanently increases GABA in your brain but that only calmed me down temporarily. What's interesting is that my IQ is still around the 120 range even though sometimes it seems like I became retarded or something. I have never been to a psychiatric ward yet. Xanax seems to help around 70 to 90% sometimes but I never took it often because of the fear of addiction and reduced memory. It also temporarily decreases my visuals as well! I also never tried hardcore drugs such as heroin, crack, meth, PCP or speed. The only hallucinogenic that I tried was LSD. I tried many different types of natural supplements and that did not cure me. Breathing exercises, walking, sprinting, jogging, calisthenics, weight lifting, good times with friends, massages, watching movies, listening to music, therapy, calming things and sex helps (dating has become much more difficult with these disorders for me). I have a lot more fear and paranoia than before HPPD and visual snow.

I wonder if anyone else is on buspirone and/or depakote?

Hi All,

In April 2013 I developed HPPD, visual snow, anxiety, depression, panic attacks, social anxiety, low self-esteem, some cognitive deficits, intrusive thoughts, decreased depth perception and some problems with speaking after taking what was sold to me as LSD but might have been some other designer drug (I didn't test it). I know many other people that took the same drug and batch but they didn't develop any of these symptoms. I immediately decided to abstain from drugs and live a healthy lifestyle. The first 2 years were the worst. I didn't go to a therapist or psychiatrist until after 8 years because I figured I would have it for life instead of those people that only have it for 1 to 5 years. It seems like in tiny increments I made some improvements over the years but to this day I still have many visual snow and HPPD symptoms. I still can't drink coffee or smoke marijuana to this day (increases anxiety and visual symptoms for me).

I was cleared by a neurologist, ophthalmologist, primary care provider, and MRI. My blood tests and MRI results look good and I can pass a drug test. The eye doctor thinks visual snow is a good diagnosis and that I was the second patient in a month to also have it. I would literally feel as if I'm about to full blown start tripping out while being completely sober for years and it would be very stressful and give me a lot of anxiety. I started going to therapy a year ago. The therapist recommended putting me on medication and I agreed. I am currently on buspirone and depakote. The combination of therapy and medication has been helpful. I don't feel like I'm tripping anymore. A lot of my depth perception and subjective good feelings returned. My panic attacks and intrusive thoughts went away many years ago and my speech improved as well. Social anxiety decreased. I tried gabapentin before depakote but it gave me many side effects so I stopped that and took depakote instead. Maybe buspirone and depakote would be a good combo for other people as well. I seem to tolerate it well. I admitted it to all of my family and friends since I'm probably going to have it for life. It sucks that there are no specific medications for visual snow and HPPD. I do feel that these disorders have greatly limited my potential and life although I was still able to enjoy and do many things in the past 10 years. Prior to onset I never had any disorders and never been to a psychiatrist or therapist before. My eyesight was above average. I also tried moving around to different climates to see if they would heal me in anyway. I personally do enjoy warm and sunny places but they did not make a big difference in my visual snow and HPPD symptoms. Really cold and dark climates did actually increase my visual snow and HPPD symptoms and also made me more depressed.

According to my doctor I seem to be more stabilized and doing better. I feel more stabilized and better as well although this still sucks. I would recommend doing therapy to anyone even if you are against taking medications. I'll continue on this journey and see where it leads me. I'm open to doing more research and hopefully finding some sort of cure or better treatment one day. It has not been easy but the idea of finding a cure, specific treatment or naturally getting better one day is one of my top goals in life and something I look forward to.

Wish you all the best of luck and hopefully all of your symptoms will improve...

Ashtanga yoga for 30 minutes in the morning. I just follow a video I downloaded.

 

I'm sure it's doing "something", but I don't notice it improving my HPPD and/or quality of life in any acute noticeable way. I won't stop doing it though, I would surely be worse if I didn't do any exercise.

Ha I hear that last sentence. Try extending it to an hour and see if it makes a difference. Try taking a few classes here and there with people and a teacher. I do Vinyasa.

I do yoga everyday and I don't notice much, but cycling my bike a sunny day and it makes wonders. Sadly the weather sucks around here lately.

What kind of yoga do you do and for how long do you do it? Yoga started doing more for me after I started getting better already. It wasn't a major help during the first 2 years. Now I feel like it increases GABA throughout my body.

I want to run another obstacle course race one day (Tough Mudder or Spartan) and was actually wondering how the intense adrenaline and endorphins you end up feeling would impact HPPD. During the first 2 years exercise used to make my visuals worse right after but I would generally feel better long term. I do exercise a lot but it doesn't compare to the intensity of a marathon or obstacle course race where you get to the point of running on pure adrenaline. I was actually scared to get to that point because of not knowing the impact it would have on my HPPD but now I definitely want to do it.

I strongly recommend running and yoga.

This article sounds less biased: http://www.the-scientist.com/?articles.view/articleNo/45818/title/Psychedelic-Neuroimaging/

They found out that gadolinium stays in the body of mice for a year after 1 injection. Everyone reacts differently. My aunt had like 6 mris with dye contrasts in 1 year and she didn't feel a thing. I know I'm never taking the dye contrast again...