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Feeling Better

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With DP, I no longer feel anger or sadness, I just feel no emotions at all and depersonalization is like a shield against being angry or sad but right now I am feeling something but I don't know what it is but its not happiness, it's not depression and it's not anger or anything I have ever felt before. I feel like I'm not even me anymore. but I kinda like it. i am actually enjoying the derealization (refer to my "positive effects from derealization" post) cuz I feel like I'm high when I ride my bike around the wetlands. I no longer feel like killing myself. I can actually talk and think about HPPD without getting anxious. All of the visuals are still the same plus a few new visual symptoms have shown up but I don't really care about visuals anymore (except for when I'm going to bed and the colors start flashing at me lol) but since I'm about to start a new school year, the brainfog will be making it hard for me but I can't just drop out and let this take over. This will probably me my last post on this website for a while but I might keep reading through and responding to some posts here and there ✌????

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