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Benzo's - A dilemma


Sam93
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Hey there everyone, hope everyone's having a decent day.

 

I'll get right to the point - my dilemma is this;

 

As we all know, everyone's HPPD pathogenesis can be markedly different from the next, some respond exceptionally well to medications that others simply don't, and vice versa. Well, it seems that Benzo's pretty much nullify my HPPD, and in particular, my DP/DR. This is why I believe my DP/DR may be a resut of excitation in specific areas of the brain.

 

My HPPD has always been quite mild on the visual side of things, however the DP/DR has always been quite strong. 

 

When I take a Benzo, this all changes. I feel much more inside my body and more connected to my emotions, they allow me to feel, whereas without them I feel very little. I suppose you could say they allow me to get to the place where I can actually enjoy my life and forget about HPPD, the DP/DR is basically all but none existant and the visuals are markedly reduced.

 

The problem I am facing is this: I am in a situation where a pill nullifies a pretty disabling condition to the point where I can enjoy my life again. I am in no way addicted to Benzo's and use them sparingly, however a 1mg dose of Etizolam works wonders for my HPPD, DP/DR. If you look at Benzo equivalancy charts this would mean I would need 0.5mg Clonazepam to achieve the same effects, which I think is a very small dose.

 

I'm not sure what to do, the once or twice a week that I take 1mg of Etizolam are fantastic and I really make the most of having my emotions back and a nice break from the visuals, however it's hard not to just take them more often. I am in no way a Benzo abuser as I don't see any recreational value in them, they just migitate my disorder massively where nothing else I have tried has done so. 

 

I have always had the attitude that I will do whatever it takes to get through life, and if this means swallowing a pill that pretty much nullifies a very disabling condition every morning then so be it. I have been using them very sparingly as of late and can control my use exceptionally well, however thie aforementioned attitude still persists, and 0.5mg of Clonazepam a day isn't much compared to people who are on 3mg a day or more.

 

Any thoughts on the matter? Sorry if I rambled on there a bit!

 

Thank you, and have a good day!

 

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The less you take the better.

Its really up to you imo.

I have about 30 x .125mg xanax that i was prescribed.

I havent even touched them, not even for 'testing' sake because I know they are only for temporary relief.

 

With that said, if your looking to try out clonazepam, (in my very own opinion) just try them?

Why not start with 0.5mg and go from there, since you are not even dependent on benzos.........yet? :\

Give enough rest before the next dose since clonazepam half life is 18-50hours and it will accumulate, compared to etizolam's 3.4hours (main metabolite 8.2hours).

 

HPPD is "unique", every benzo and dosage works differently for others, if you can find relief with less dosage, why not.

 

I guess someone with more benzo experience should chime in. 

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  • 2 weeks later...

I was exactly like you when this crap started, the klono/clonazepam make everything "almost normal" dp dr mostly. 0,5mg was enough to bring me back to earth, i remember the first year and that feeling was amazing... but be CAREFUL.. i develop some extremely disturbing mood changes and paranoia. My dose now is between 0.5mg-1mg (once a week a need a little more to sleep really well). Now the klono calms me down a little but the great relief of the first times is over (im sure it will be back if i take 3mg but thats not the point).

 

My advice, take the minimal dose and few times per week. The benzo's wd's and dependence is really a HELL.

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