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I need help


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So, this is my story... I did mdma probably 15 times with no hppd symptoms. It all started when I decided to taked my first tab of acid while I was already rolling (candy flip.) Long story short it turned out to be the worst day of my life as I had a 13 hour bad trip filled with anxiety, fear, extreme depression, sense of impending doom, hopelessness, disconnection, etc. It was a textbook bad trip and as soon as it began I started to get the feeling that it would never end. Well, I survived it and since that day it's like I have been in a constant bad trip (fast forward almost two months.) I foolishly tried mdma about 3 times since that day and the rolls were unenjoyably filled with anxiety and the comedowns are horrible. I never will touch that horrible drug again. I have come to the conclusion that I am suffering from HPPD but I blame the acid. I have been experiencing intenese DP/DR since that day with no improvement. I dont really get that many visual symptoms just only when I smoke weed. I used to smoke all day everyday and love it but now I cant enjoy that either because it worsens my condition and that is when I start to get the visual side effects.of this nightmarish disorder. I have made all the necessary changes to diet, lifetsyle, and try to stay positive and live healthy and do everything that can be done to alleviate some of these symptoms. I dont do any drugs anymore but I desperately want to start smoking weed again as it used to help with my anxiety and depression but now it only makes it worse. I have tried literally everything I can to get better but the DP/DR seems to be getting worse. I guess im just looking for someone to tell me that this will get easier or maybe even go away because I just want my life back. I feel so hopeless, like im going crazy. Please someone help me.

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hey there my friend, my hppd was triggered by lsd as well, i had a very similar experience to yours, i never really came down from my trip and i had the WORST DP/DR as well as visual disturbances. I thought it would never get better and that my life as i knew it was over. I spent every day crying and curled up in a ball hiding from the world. Luckily i came across this website and it gave me the hope that one day i'd be okay. It has now been 7 months and in the past few weeks my DP DR is so much better, sometimes during the day i cannot even notice it. I now work 40 hours a week, drive my car again, and do most of the things i used to enjoy and am back to most of my normal life. My advice to you is give it time, avoid the weed and have faith that it will get better becuase it will. I have been where you are.


My thoughts and prayers are with you. 

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