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Marijuana Use


John Smith

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Hey guys, new here, kinda new to hppd as well.

I got mine 5 months after my last trip on mushrooms, which brought the grand total to about 8 times during a 6 month period i'd say, with one 2 hit LSD trip somewhere in there. I guess I consider myself lucky because my symptoms arent pronounced enough to the point where they affect my daily functioning. I have the visual snow, halos and streaks of light through pretty much any light, tracers, especially when i wave my arms around, some mild anxiety, difficulty falling asleep, head zaps, and after images. Ive also become kinda manic, in the sense that when i forget about my hppd, im actually very happy and outgoing, kinda like the shroom comedown except not as strong.

Ive never experienced DPDR, or seen any patterns while sober. I hadnt smoked in months because i was sold weed laced with pcp and smoking would just cause an immediate flashback. Now that the effects of pcp are subsiding (its been a horrible 7 months of feeling like an absolute vegetable, but im almost normal now, except for the hppd symptoms) and Ive started smoking again. When I get really baked I notice organic, tribal like patterns on surfaces like the ground mostly, and on my skin, but they go away once I stop smoking. I can enjoy smoking still, even though there are times when I get a bit anxious but some valerian or st johns wort usually brings me right round. Since I started smoking, the streaks through lights have become slightly more noticeable but thats about it.

I kinda feel like PCP (ironically since it turned my life to shit for months...a real blessing in disguise i think) saved me from a true living hell since I woulda definitely tried LSD again. My question is this...can i get full blown HPPD/DPDR just from the amount of shrooms I tried? I always felt like it was more of a problem for people who get it from LSD, since the visual effects of it are stronger, and shrooms just always seemed like the more beingn of the two.

Ive been smoking daily, and drinking occassionally (i do get tipsy but dont over do it), and everythings been fine, I actually feel kinda good, like im almost out of the hole im in, but im scared that one day im gonna be high, and somethings gonna click in my head, just like the horrible night when I got HPPD, and find myself in a deeper hole, with symptoms 10 times worse than before.

Has this happened to anyone?

Thanks alot guys, im sorry for what you guys have all had to go through.

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This might be a common theme among the members here. Some of those of us who are on the uphill find ourselves smoking weed and drinking. Nothing out of control but it seem natural to question if we are falling again into the same pattern that orignally caused our HPPD. This is something I'm struggling with myself. I don't smoke anymore and I can't really tell you if it would trigger another HPPD episode. But i started drinking lots of caffeine and a lot of them times it makes me feel awful. And tripped out. My gut feeling tells me just to quit while I'm ahead and keep breathing deep full breathes. I have to say though, that after being around many stoners, the weed isn't doing much for them at all!! The difference between when I wasn't smoking weed and when I was (pre-HPPD) was almost as significant as not having DP/DR and having it, so with HPPD I imagine that clearheaded-ness we all seek would be that much more in reach if you put the joint down.

Dukkha

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