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My recovery story and should i take Bupropion?


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Hello! 

Im 19yo, I developed hppd a year and a half ago and always checked this forum, but never had an account.

at the age of 12, I was diagnosed with anxiety/depression and since I was a kid I felt what we call dp/dr, visual snow and tinnitus. I used to treat anxiety taking sertraline, but stopped before drugs.

After starting smoking weed and doing some ecstasy, mdma, mda and cocaine accidentally (who gave it to me told it was mdma), I noticed a lot of worsening in my symptoms, I noticed that I had palinopsia too, I freaked out and got really bad, for like 9 or 10 months.

I did everything to get better (really everything). Took some benzos to chill out (Clonazepam, Alprazolam and Diazepam), did acupuncture (I think that helped), started eating better, exercise, treated my spirit with a sensitive woman, a lot of things.

Nowadays, I think my symptoms are like they were before drugs  (?) but they definitely got better and some vanished, but now I know that I have palinopsia too.

I drink alcohol, I roll my own tobacco and sometimes take a good amount of xanax. None of these make me feel worse.

My question is, these days my anxiety is on maximum state, my doctor recommended me taking wellbutrin, because he knows I will never touch ssri's and I don't want to get addicted to benzo s, do you guys think taking it has a chance to bring back my old symptoms and worsen the ones that I already have? 

ps. Once, when I was "recovered", I gave weed a try and it didn't increased my visuals symptoms in a way that I noticed, but gave me a trigger on my anxiety in the next days.

Thx and greetings from Brazil (Is my english that bad?)

I hope all of you guys recover from this thing that we suffer.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Hi mate,

I didn't use that much of clonazepam, because my grandfather was addicted to this for 35 years, I was scared of using it, he died from dementia impacts and consequences.

I took it for like two weeks, then, I changed to xanax and valium. (took xanax, here in brazil the brand name is called frontal, for like a month and, after two months without it, took valium for one more month)

Nowadays, I take a xanny or valium once in a while, just when I`m very anxious. I could say one large dose (3~4mg of xanax) every two/three weeks, just to black me out and forget the pain.

but man, what really helped, exercising, especially aerobics, because of the large dose of endorphin that u get from it. but I only do cardio when I want to lose body fat. I normally go to the gym to do some workout shit.

I also do some dry needling.

 

Bringing the bupropion to the conversation, I wont give it a try for now.

 

How bad do u think that is ur hppd? in a scale of 1 to 10. Are u getting better?

 

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