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Self diagnosed six weeks in


DoneDoof
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I guess i should intruduced myself, i'm a 26 yr old male,a little over weight and i've delt with depression and anxiety for a long time. six weeks ago after abusing mdma i woke up with what i thought/think was Depersonalization. I felt like i was looking through a periscope and my eyes were the lens. I felt completely disconnected from the world to the point where i thought that maybe i died that night. Of course i didn't think that for very long but it was very frieghtening. A week went by but i came down from it but the visual distortions stayed.

 

I tried MDMA for the first time this september, i liked it so much i did it the next weekend and i ended up to way too much. The following week was terrible but i started to get better. The following weekend my friends conveniced me to do some more, very little amount. the third time wasn't as fun but not a terrible time. The next day i woke up and my vision had changed as i explained up top. Now its been six weeks and i still have weird vision problems. Static snow, auras around lights, blurry vision, light sensitivity, floaters, weird spotty sight and after images. I'm conveniced it's HPPD, i quit everything, i tried weed a few times since but it made things worse everytime. i had two drags from a cig last night and it made it worse again. What do you guys think, is it too soon to tell? Also i have trouble finding info on people getting better, averagly is it a very long term to heal or is it rare for people to have it 1+ years? have you guys actually heard of people getting better from this? I'm not really sure what info i'm looking for really, i just feel lost and want to talk to people about it.

 

i have gone to the doctor a few times, she tells me its to soon to tell. got an appointment with a psychologist and ive seen an optometrist and got my eye's fully tested, test came back fine.

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Hi DoneDoof,

 

I'm also om my 6th week in. Low five! I first developed slight HPPD through MDMA as well, but it got fully blown by taking a half blotter of acid. There's people using MDMA every weekend for years without getting HPPD so I don't think that you should blame your self for abusing it, or taking too much. I kept myself hydrated and never had a bad trip and still ended up just like you. It's possible that we have "it" in us, and the drugs just takes it out of us as there are plently of cases of HPPD/Visual Snow Syndrome without drug abuse, so don't be too hard on yourself.

 

You and I seems to be on the exact same route, as I've also been to an opthamologist twice and of course everything is just fine.. Going for my first EEG on thursday. I'm not allowed to sleep the day before. So excited! Uhm not really.. but what I've heard is that it's possible to recover within 6 months-1 year mark by keeping yourself away from any drug (caffeine included), eating healthy and exercising. If you can't stand it, which I barely can't right now, you can try different anti-epileptic medicin to reduce the activity within the visual cortex that is most-likely causing these distortions. If you want to see it in a positive way the brain is basicly taking in too much information from the eye, so we have some kind of super-sight. I actually improved my vision. Went to do an eye-exam today and my sight has actually improved (with -0.25) since getting this mess so atleast that's something!

 

Why I'm still functioning is probably because my body went into some state where I basicly can't feel anxiety or panic. Pretty numb in other words, but I can still feel good times to times which is weird because I should be devastated. Waking up in the morning empty as a cracked nutshell is killing me though.

 

Try LCHF-diet to start with, it has an anti-epileptic effect on the brain and it seems to be effective. Try to relax with some mediation or sleeping songs and dont push yourself too hard. I hope that you'll get better, as much as I have hope for myself. Let's have a challenge who gets HPPD-free first! Counting from today :)

 

Best Regards,

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