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15 with hppd


Mr.50's
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Hello everyone, I'm new to posting stuff but I've been an observer of other posts on this amazing website for a while. I am 15 and developed hppd when I was 14 from synthetic marijuana. In my entire life I've taken weed 150+ times, spice(synthetic cannabis)15 times, nitrous 15 times, hydrocodone 2, ritalin 5-7 times, and dxm once. I started smoking weed in mid 8th grade and i new I liked it and didn't want to stop anytime soon. I had so many people tell me not to do other drugs I should have listened but I didn't and now here I am. Eventually I got caught smoking weed and I couldn't medicate at the amount I wanted to with my parents always checking me. This is when spice caught my eye cause it was cheap and barely smelt. I did it about twice untill I had a horrible trip which was the very beginning of my hell. The trip itself was intense, an out of body experience which made me forget everything I've ever known for about 10 minutes. But after that passed and I felt better, something compelled me to smoke spice 6 more time the next day. After that weird episode passed I continued smoking weed with all of the hppd warning signs but I loved drugs so much I didn't want to stop. After a couple months of constant weed use my world was turning upside down so eventually I stopped but it was to late. I had full blow. Hppd and depersonalization, which was the most confusing time of my life. That was maybe 5 or 6 months back and since then a lot has changed. My hppd is about 30-40% better and my depersonalization is about 85-90% better. I've stopped drinking caffeine and have been sober for a while. My main visual symptoms are. Visual snow that is relatively light. Very light afterimages. Severe light sensitivity. I'm positive that these symptoms will slowy go away but Lately there has been no improvement whatsoever . My main goal is to smoke weed again but I'm positive I will, thanks for reason you help me I help yo

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Well I hope u don't have what I got at least for the duration. I'm 40 years old and I fell victim to this disease when I was 16 years old. I took magic mushrooms laced with acid (7-9 grams) I never had a clue to what was going to happen to me after that intoxication. My heart was smashing through my chest sight and sound was completely messed up I had an out of body experience and was looking down at myself from like 20 feet in the air. I had anxiety at an immeasurable rate followed by derealization and depersonalization which was the whole trip. I didn't come down for three days I still didn't feel right kind of like a residue after affect I couldn't recognize peoples voices they sounded different my ears started ringing every night and the birth of bright lights, after images, tinnitus, trails, tracers, anxiety, depression, and it has intensified over the years. I used alcohol to help me cope I noticed when I was drinking it never affected me this was my shield for years but when I sobered up it was back again. I started drinking coffee 10 years ago then I noticed it started to progress worse with the visuals and anxiety. I finally figured out it was the caffeine being the catalyst to the problem. I've been tortured by these horrible distortions for 24 years now. I feel its the intensity of lights even though its not reality (they are not that bright) they help or assist the after images, trails, and traces. Like right now I'm in a low lit up room typing this message from my lit up phone. when I look away from it I see the perimeter of the phone in blue color on the wall or wherever I look at. It wasn't this bad 10 years ago this would not have happened in this setting it has gotten worse unfortunately. I don't think anyone has it as bad as me to be honest. Stay away from street drugs especially psychedelic drugs. Trust.

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