zandzager

Around the 1 year mark for me, Meditating really helped

Sounds like anxiety I guess, Tried meditation yet?

It was such a hell in the beginning, Headaches, brainfog anxiety .. just not feeling right and feeling slow like I cant do anything at all oh and not being able to fall asleep.

But it just slowly kept getting better and better and it really went uphill when i stopped with ciggarette's, alcohol and started to meditate and join Nofap

The diffrence is unreal I cant really remember how it used to be a year ago, and I really dont wanna know either lol im fine with this.

Hai Guys, been about 14 months with HPPD.

now things are going  much and much better

Just a little update before my question.

Anxiety has been lowered atleast 80% 

Brainfog also around 80% I dont even feel it anymore.. im most suprised with that one .. I can enjoy stressfull things like gaming again.

And the most recest changes Ive noticed that my trails/halo's/starburst and ghosting has been getting alot less too

I stopped drinking alcohol, avoided as much cafeine as i could and started meditation.

So now for the question:

How could you actually know that your DP/DR is gone? you go from feeling not alive to alive and it probably would freak you out alot?

Has anyone have this happen to them 

I have no idea if i still have DP/DR or that im just still in the mindset of it.

Why is meditation a bad thing suddenly? it helped me much with brainfog and anxiety 

HPPD is caused by problems with processing visual information in the brain so if you only have the problem in one eye then chances are it's just a problem with the vision in that eye. Have you been for an eye test recently? If your right eye is amblyopic (lazy) it's even more likely a problem with the vision.

yeah I thought so too, But i noticed when my visuals are getting worse then the "double vision" gets worse too

Maybe its a bit of both ends? 

idk how to delete posts.

If it could only stay at visual snow i would be so happy !!

Things are getting so weird for me this week and im going insane.

I have this too. In particular it strikes whenever I try to play blitz chess or read text on a computer screen for more than a few minutes at the time.

Seems that HPPD may lower stress threshold, especially when it comes to activities that demand rapid visual and mental processing. When past a certain point the body starts excreting stress hormones like cortisol, which gives you brain fog, high blood pressure, etc.

I think you have to just accept your current limitations and move on in life. Replace old hobbies with new ones that are easier on the brain. Exercise and outdoor activities are really great! Since I got HPPD I have started cycling and roller skiing. Next up I am looking to get into swimming. Get out there and discover something you love doing.

The good news is that, at least in my case, the stress seems to diminish after a while. Especially as you learn how to manage and what to avoid.

Yeah I should really find something new, Im still looking for it but its quite hard.

 I also might  think that i got it because I was having  anxiety when i was playing games so maybe the combined stress from the game + anxiety got too much.

When i was like 2 months into HPPD I had the same as you, I could not do anything it was so bad,

then it got so much less

probably my blood pressure was very high that time because I had hyperventilation.

Thanks for the reply mate 

I sorta have this, except my symptoms are more related to macropsia. So for example, when I look at objects in the distance I see them very clear and proportional to their actual size but when I focus on objects that are closer to me they gradually get larger while the background of my vision gets really blurry. It's almost as if my eyes are frozen and anything that's close to me is difficult to focus on. I heard recently that optical nerves are closely related to brain functions so this doesn't surprise me. Clearly my brain is broken and therefore so are my eyes. 

I have something similar, if i looked at walls for example they sort of moved and got diffrent shapes( not all too much) but I dont even stare at wall anymore like that

I ignore most visual HPPD stuff now.

Hello

Lately Ive been playing some games again, just felt like it.

games like League of legends and all, games that can give you alot of stress and can frustrate you.

I used to play alot of LoL before I got HPPD and was under stress nearly every day by it,  but it dint do anything bad for me back then.

But if I Stress at the game now I get a pressured feeling in my head like you just cant relax anymore it takes quite along time to get it to go away.

This really bothers me because I wont be able to play games if i have this ( I know i could just worry less about the games im playing but that is a hard thing to do for me.)

Is this brainfog? I only get it when im extremely focussed or if im under very hard stress (or anger)

Thanks for reading.

I see blue dots when i rub my eyes and then open them... but its not always.

Hello guys im back again with another question.. !

So Ive been noticing for a few months that if i look down onto things that i start seeing some sort of ghosting/seeing double

But if i cover my right eye. it disapears 

and if i cover my left eye it stays the same... so now

Do i just have a problem with my eye or is it  HPPD? Btw my right eye is abit lazy 

I was just wondering this..

Thanks you

Hi zandzagger. In a year I will be in the same spot as you, and I have the same worries in the back of my mind. Lots of valuable advice here, thanks guys. Interested to hear how it works out for you, feel free keep us posted.

Oh, and I agree that exercise is gold. Daily exercise is what gets me through right now. Highly recommended! I'm also one year in.

All the best.

Ive been playing pokemon go for a few days now walking and biking alot and it sure does help I maybe thought once or twice about HPPD while i was hunting them juicy pokemons

Goodluck to you too!

I'd imagine it will continue to get better since it sounds like you've improved each month or so. I'm just saying it might be best to give yourself a bit of time early on before you jump into a career. Take a year or two to ride this out and see where you're at. That's all. 

Yeah i wont do that i most likely go travel or go back to school in the next 2 years..

And i Imagine you ment the early stages of my healing? 

Got alittle shocked hehe 

thanks for the replies !

Lots of great advice here and I'd echo what Jay said. If you've only had this a year then you're still in the early stages. As Year2 mentions, you shouldn't put life off completely but I also think there's a balance to be struck between living a life with joy and giving yourself a bit of time to heal.

 

I know for me I couldn't live the same lifestyle I had before HPPD. I was traveling the world, partying, sleeping by the side of the road and that's just not realistic anymore. I've put my life on hold for now and I'm OK with that just because I'm also only at about a year and am doing everything in my power to heal. If I could do the things I did before and hold the jobs I wanted then I probably would, but I still don't think I'm at that point. As people here are well aware, this is truly a debilitating condition. 

 

In my opinion the best jobs to hold in the early stages of recovery are not career oriented but rather jobs you don't much care about, that way you can quit anytime in case of emergency. I also think jobs where you don't have to talk to too many people are likely ideal as brain fog and other speech problems can interfere with your ability to work and make you frustrated as a result. I've had two jobs in the last year, both working outside, both where I had lots of independence and flexibility. I listened to music almost all day at both and didn't have to talk to too many people. I also think jobs that require you to be on your feet and moving are much better for you as they're good for the brain and can keep your attention away from focusing in on your symptoms. 

 

This is just my opinion. Perhaps other people feel differently. But this has worked for me and I've liked both my jobs and will probably stay at the one I'm at for another year while I continue to try and recover. 

Yeah I see. I was not thinking of a real job either just some vacation job you know haha

What exactly do you mean with early stages, is it going to get worse later on?

A year was just a long amount of time to allow you to heal without drugs in your system... Personally, I would just forget weed, I still get panic attacks if I smoke it now, 20 years later.

Everyone is different though, you might be one of the lucky few who can smoke it again.

Btw- did you get panic attacks before you got hppd?

just saw you commented on this too, Nope i never had gotten a panick attack before my HPPD

btw - while you are in that year 1 / year 2 phase where recovery potential and forming coping mechanisms are at their highest.... Is it possible to just take a year out? Maybe go travelling, or just relax for a year. Maybe just do a bit of completely stress free manual labour for some money.

 

In year 2-3 of my hppd... i just did some factory work for 6 months, then used the money to travel. I think it saved my life.

I have no money at all, I want to travel that why i want a job right now 

My anxiety isnt really that bad I have maybe 2-3 bad days every 2 weeks or 3? 

I have been feeling quite okay for awhile now  I think im getting better quite fast 

Im just afraid if i find a job all  the bad things will return to me again bcuz of stress and working hard 

I heard working out makes your HPPD worse too so i figured that doing heavy work would do the same..

But thanks for the advices ! 

All the comments really helped 

Hi Zandzager.  My advice is to get a job and tough it out.  To me, the worst mentality is to put your life on hold until you're 'better'.  I've had this thing for 35 years, though I don't think about it much anymore and the symptoms are barely noticable.  Like it or not, it's now part of 'you' so you have to move forward.  It sounds like your symptoms may well disappear but be strong and be ambitious.  Most of us (all of us?) get this when we're very young.  I was 19.  I mourned my previous life too much at first, but the fact is, we all have to grow as adults and adulthood is hard for everyone, especially those who have been living a hedonistic (some would say selfish) lifestyle.  The person you want to be lies ahead of you, not behind you.  Much luck mate.

Hey thanks for the advice,  really made me think about it!

Its gonna be hard for sure ..

Hello Guys its nearly my 1year "celebration" for my HPPD 

Ive learned alot about it and it feels like its getting better each month or two

I just wanted to ask how you guys manage to work a job with HPPD?

Most days I feel good but there are also days where you just feel bad and fatigued, ya'll know that feel im sure.

I finished school a few months ago and wanna try to find a job..

But im afraid if I have a job that I will get alot of stress and will get really tired and that my HPPD get very bad 

Im not feeling sure how i could have a job  if I start to feel anxiety or DP/DR or just feeling fatigued and slow

English isnt my native language so sorry for any errors !

thanks for reading

No... Lasts about 5 minutes (the visual increase, not the sex!)

Smoking weed again is far, far more risky... Enjoy a few beers and a load of college girls, leave the weed for at least a year

Why leave it for 1 year? will it be less likely to make the HPPD worse? 

I get panick attacks when i smoke, will those ever go away?, last time ive smoked was about 8 months ago.

Hello everyone

My question of today is:

Does anyone else feel abit off sometimes like you are tired and feel like ur  on the edge of having a panick attack 

but you're not feeling panicked at all, just feeling like your  adrenaline is going up alittle 

Im not scared or panicked at all but it feels like i am

Idk how to explain it but its an annoying and weird feeling

If you have trouble with this too, how do you deal with it and how to get it to go away?

(HPPD for 7-8 months now, dealing with it is quite easy now )

Thanks for reading

Zand

I get better sleep by waiting til I am very tired. If I'm lucky, I get 7 hours. When I close my eyes, it seems bright. It's like I'm sleeping while the lights are on despite being in the dark. Do things that make you very sleepy and you should sleep more

 

Yeah I have that too sometimes, Just a white kind of light but that rarely happends, luckily

I try sleeping only when im tired and it helps pretty well but sometimes it still can get annoying

Thanks for the reply

Hello guys Having Mild HPPD for a few month now 

I dont really bother myself on it anymore its all good but sleeping is still harder then it should be i feel like

I see all kinds of things moving when i close my eyes and I feel like i start to dream while im still awake sometimes and its really making sleeping hard for me

Anyone having trouble with this too? and do you guys maybe have tips?

Thanks for reading!

I used to have so many that it actually annoyed my vision sometimes, now they have got really small and barely see them anymore