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HPPD?


Hall89
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Hi! New here! I suspect that i have gotten a mild form of HPPD after only two hits of cannabis 19 days ago (first time in years), it didn't even give me a "rush", only calmed my breathing down a little and made me tired. But the day after to today i have experienced a crippling anxiety and regular panic attacks over the days, slight feelings of derealization, a brain fog, wierd pressure in my head that comes and goes and worst of it all, visual snow and a slightly decreased pherpipeal sight. The visual impairment gives me the worst anxiety because i'm so scared that it won't go away and it have robbed me of the thing that i love doing the most here in life.

At first i only thought that it was a migraine with aura since i normally get feelings of derealization, great anxiety and a brain fog a day to hours before (prodromal phase) the aura- and pain phase, which i did get the day after, but everything above didn't go away after the migraine like it normally does and the anxiety was way worse than it normally is, so i'm pretty sure that it's HPPD. Also, about a week after this started i saw a light in a store "move" up and down for about 5 seconds, then it stopped, the same day i also looked at an object which for a couple of second became bigger and smaller, like it came towards me and then went back, except these two i haven't had any other visual hallucinations. It have more or less destroyed my daily life since it occupies my mind 24/7 and i haven't been able to work or study since it's so diffucult reading text on the screen and i don't dare to drive a car in this state, so i wonder, have anyone else here gotten rid of the visual snow? If so, how long did it take? I would gladly give both my legs to get rid of it. God! I'm so angry at myself for taking those two hits of cb, if i knew that it could cause anything like this i would never have touched it😭

Have anyone here tried any of the medications that have helped in some of the studies that have been made? Like the antiepileptic lamotrigine? I have felt some relief of the symptoms the days that i have used the sleep med zopiclone which acts on the GABA like benzodiazepines, Oxazepame also gives a slight relief, but i'm scared of eating these daily because i don't want to get addicted to benzos.

PS, i haven't used any other drugs in my life than alcohol 4-5 times a year and cannabis at a few occations, like 10 times during 13 years.

Edited by Hall89
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Hang in there man.  Try and not focus on it (I know it's easier said than done).  Keep yourself busy with productive healthy things such as exercise, any hobby, and try to relax.  Many people recover it usually just takes some time (the exact amount is different for everyone).  Unfortunately you can find yourself in a feedback cycle where the disturbance creates anxiety, and then anxiety exacerbates the symptoms which creates anxiety etc...  Many people on here have felt totally helpless at one point (myself included)  you  just have hope that your mind will recover.  You'll discover that the mind is an extraordinarily resilient machine, just let it do the work; consciously focussing on the symptoms will only make them worse.  My advice is as always: 

-Stop all drugs and alcohol (at least for a few months, which it seems you have) 

-Get plenty of sleep 

-Try and minimize obsessing over the symptoms 

-Eat healthy 

-Get as much exercise as you can (even if it exacerbates the symptoms)

-Try and be as hopeful and positive as you can 

Also, take solace in the fact that your drug use history is pretty minor which means you will probably make a full recovery. 

Take care and keep on keeping on!

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