Questions about symptoms

[BillR 1]

Hey there, My name is Bill 22yo and I'm new to this forum. I was a heavy drug user during my teens (16-19yo). I took lots of Ecstasy, LSD, Ketamine, Coke and other research compounds. Starting from 3 years ago I totally decided to change my life. Stopped taking most substances, started to exercise more, meditate, eat healthy and use different supplements and biohacking tools to heal and recover. Since then, I only had a couple of trips and few micro doses of LSD in a spiritual and therapeutic context. Last Thursday, I decided to take 1.5mg (Micro dose) of 4-ACO DMT (Synthetic shrooms) after one year of total abstinence. I was mainly after increasing productivity, creativity and stabilizing mood. Micro-dosing psychedelics was a go to therapeutic tool for me when I feel lost and in need of some introspection and serious change. Overall, that day went very well. Had lots of introspective moments, took lots of notes and everything was smooth and beautiful.

5 days after and here I am. It feels like I was stuck in that mini (good) trip. Colors are more intense, objects are more defined, I am more aware of my surrounding, slightly more anxious (I rarely suffer from anxiety generally), and feel a slight de-personalization/de-realization. Nothing too intense or crippling overall comparing to what other people are describing and I feel super grateful for it. Still, it feels like I'm stuck in that micro trip forever which is still frightening knowing that I won't live normally again and that I'm risking the advancement of those symptoms with the use of any other psycho-active substance even if it's for therapeutic use.

My sleep quality and sleep cycles have changed since then. I know have some restless sleep during the first part of the night and my REM sleep duration has increased significantly.

Would like to hear your thoughts as well as your recommendations. Can the symptoms worsen out with time in my case? 

Edited October 27, 2020 by BillR

[SomebodySomewhere 12]

Hi,

I actually developed my HPPD from 4-ACO-DMT, about 14 years ago. I wish mine was a "good trip", for me it's a nightmare.

I would say that your symptoms won't get worse IF, and only if, you quit using substances. No weed, no psychedelics, not anything. If you do you're going to make things worse, and trust me, you do not want that. There have been suicides due to this disorder.

I'm not going to pretend I didn't once find therapeutic value in psychedelics, especially at low doses. Consider yourself lucky that your symptoms are mild and aren't too unpleasant. It's possible your set of symptoms may go away after a while, or they could be permanent, so don't make matters worse by using anything else, including the micro-dose therapy.

If you have any questions/need advice, shoot away.

Edited October 28, 2020 by Swartz

[SomebodySomewhere 12]

@BillR If you don't mind me asking, what are your visual symptoms? I'm just curious because you're the only other person I've encountered that might have HPPD from this rare substance. I know when I tried it, it became available because people on this black-market drug message board I was on were asking if someone would make it, so two dealers started making it, after some Harvard student suggested it might be a safer alternative to shrooms in a research paper (fuck you Harvard student, not as safe as you thought...).

[NickMaxon17 0]

I dont know fs if I have hppd but I ha e expansions on surfaces and tracers on and off but its not hallucinations or anything crazy can anyone help 

[NickMaxon17 0]

Just now, NickMaxon17 said:

I dont know fs if I have hppd but I ha e expansions on surfaces and tracers on and off but its not hallucinations or anything crazy can anyone help 

^^^ I am 17 and have taken DMT, LSD, and Psilocybin. Weed is also more intense.

[SomebodySomewhere 12]

4 hours ago, NickMaxon17 said:

I dont know fs if I have hppd but I ha e expansions on surfaces and tracers on and off but its not hallucinations or anything crazy can anyone help 

Hi,

You haven't gone into enough detail.

How long has this been going on, and did it start after one particular trip? Having read through this board, do you experience other symptoms people talk about, like depersonalization/derealization, bad anxiety?

The more info the more we can help.

Also, quit using weed IMMEDIATELY, if you don't, and you do have HPPD, you're going to make it much worse.

 

[Onemorestep 52]

On 10/27/2020 at 9:23 AM, BillR said:

Hey there, My name is Bill 22yo and I'm new to this forum. I was a heavy drug user during my teens (16-19yo). I took lots of Ecstasy, LSD, Ketamine, Coke and other research compounds. Starting from 3 years ago I totally decided to change my life. Stopped taking most substances, started to exercise more, meditate, eat healthy and use different supplements and biohacking tools to heal and recover. Since then, I only had a couple of trips and few micro doses of LSD in a spiritual and therapeutic context. Last Thursday, I decided to take 1.5mg (Micro dose) of 4-ACO DMT (Synthetic shrooms) after one year of total abstinence. I was mainly after increasing productivity, creativity and stabilizing mood. Micro-dosing psychedelics was a go to therapeutic tool for me when I feel lost and in need of some introspection and serious change. Overall, that day went very well. Had lots of introspective moments, took lots of notes and everything was smooth and beautiful.

5 days after and here I am. It feels like I was stuck in that mini (good) trip. Colors are more intense, objects are more defined, I am more aware of my surrounding, slightly more anxious (I rarely suffer from anxiety generally), and feel a slight de-personalization/de-realization. Nothing too intense or crippling overall comparing to what other people are describing and I feel super grateful for it. Still, it feels like I'm stuck in that micro trip forever which is still frightening knowing that I won't live normally again and that I'm risking the advancement of those symptoms with the use of any other psycho-active substance even if it's for therapeutic use.

My sleep quality and sleep cycles have changed since then. I know have some restless sleep during the first part of the night and my REM sleep duration has increased significantly.

Would like to hear your thoughts as well as your recommendations. Can the symptoms worsen out with time in my case? 

Abstinence is the only known thing that can help with time for certain. After a period (its months to years) some leave this “sensitized state” I call the acute phase of hppd. They then either recover or enter the chronic phase.  
 

even if you feel “normal” after a period of time, you can still be in the sensitization state and a psych can throw you back in 10x worse than the time before. A mistake I’ve made in the past is thinking in past this stage when I am really not. It’s really quite fascinating in the exponential quality of the increasing intensity of it.

 

even if you leave the acute phase you can still retrigger it later in life. Unfortunately, once you’ve gotten bit, there doesn’t seem a way to go back to causal use although some have reported being able to handle cannabis after a fashion but only well into recovery. 

 

but yea you don’t really have much in the way of options. This is generally a two direction street when in the acute phase— one leads to possible recover and the other straight into a hell you can’t possibly imagine xD I would go as far as to say those with hppd can be the most miserable people on the planet the symptoms can be so intense. Not to freak you out— yours seems mild. Although that’s a comparative statement haha

[BillR 1]

10 hours ago, Onemorestep said:

Abstinence is the only known thing that can help with time for certain. After a period (its months to years) some leave this “sensitized state” I call the acute phase of hppd. They then either recover or enter the chronic phase.  
 

even if you feel “normal” after a period of time, you can still be in the sensitization state and a psych can throw you back in 10x worse than the time before. A mistake I’ve made in the past is thinking in past this stage when I am really not. It’s really quite fascinating in the exponential quality of the increasing intensity of it.

 

even if you leave the acute phase you can still retrigger it later in life. Unfortunately, once you’ve gotten bit, there doesn’t seem a way to go back to causal use although some have reported being able to handle cannabis after a fashion but only well into recovery. 

 

but yea you don’t really have much in the way of options. This is generally a two direction street when in the acute phase— one leads to possible recover and the other straight into a hell you can’t possibly imagine xD I would go as far as to say those with hppd can be the most miserable people on the planet the symptoms can be so intense. Not to freak you out— yours seems mild. Although that’s a comparative statement haha

Hey Onemorestep,

Thank you for your reply. Your perspective is really valuable. Should I abstinent from alcohol as well?

[Onemorestep 52]

14 hours ago, BillR said:

Hey Onemorestep,

Thank you for your reply. Your perspective is really valuable. Should I abstinent from alcohol as well?

No problem bud.
 

If you can, yes. Especially if you’ve drank and noticed it effects you differently from before. Many report that alcohol makes their hppd worse, albeit temporarily for most. 
 

Alcohol kinda has a very dirty chemical moa. I can’t think of any brain disorder where it’s recommended. Hell there isn’t even a safe daily amount set by the government anymore.

 

there is some beliefs here on this website that hppd involves some measure of brain injury as a component (scary word but such a common injury). If looking at it this way, one would deff want to avoid alcohol. I’ve noticed with hppd triggerings in my past my brain inflammation skyrockets. Alcohol will make that worse.

 

I love alcohol (or used to; now it feels like ass), so I’m just saying probs best to avoid for a bit because if you play your cards right, you’ll be able to drink for the rest of your life, should you choose, and not have to deal with it aggravating a mental disease. It’s a pain in the ass I know since it’s half of how many societies socialize. 
 

life is super long. Any annoyance or discomfort you feel over the next year from having to make these changes and whatnot will seem a distant memory eventually when you’re having a few beers with friends down the road.