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Getting HPPD'rs perspective


hppdvs
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I had posted this is the symptoms forum, but I feel as if this board gets more traffic? I'd really like some perspective, so thanks for you time!


 


SELF DIAGNOSED


I am posting this tonight after a long time of having HPPD, to compare my symptoms to everyone elses, and most importantly be convinced that my symptoms are just symptoms.


Like most people with HPPD the anxiety of thinking it is something else can kill, and I am hoping to get some perspective on this here from other people with HPPD. 


I have read through the forums many times, and have seen my symptoms many times, but I guess something about me posting it gives me some sort of peace of mind?


You input it greatly appreciated! 


 


I am a 20 year old, college student.


Healthy & Athletic (All my life)


HPPD 2 Years


 


Symptoms: 


(100% of the time symptoms increase with anxiety)


-Blue Field Entopic Phenomena (White blood cells visible against blue sky)


-Visual Snow 


-Trails on lights in dark. Especially RED


-Random lines at night


-Scintillating multi colored patterns in white walls in certain lighting (like a line of tie die through my vision that kinda morphs around)


-Outlines, "Auras" around people/objects against light backgrounds (re appeared after further drug use, disappeared for a while)


-VERY slight Depersonalization, derealization. (rarely)


-Anxiety


-Panic Attacks (Rare)


-Slight after images. Pressing on my eye, stare at the tv screen, etc. (Can get images out of them if i'm super anxious, very rare though) 


 


 


Drugs taken:


Ecstasy, Adderral, Weed


 


-Ecstasy:


 Timing: Ecstasy at 16. 3 month period (often) until bad trip. 1 year & half later BOOM HPPD Symptoms. (VERY late onset)


 Started again (foolishly) A year ago, dosed pretty heavy every once in a while (monthly), quit about 3months ago after anxiety killed me (&truthfully want to change my life)


 


-Adderral:


 Once RIGHT before my first HPPD symptoms occurred. Had first Panic Attack, started noting HPPD symptoms shortly after.


 


-Weed:


 Periodically since I was 15. Never been a big fan due to it generally caused me anxiety.


 


Medical History: (I've never mentioned the drugs)


-Struggled with anxiety & migraines as a young kid. Disappeared until it resurfaced with HPPD (Not migraines just anxiety) 


-Neurologist (I described most the symptoms) Dismissed it as something he didn't see as worrying 


-Optometrist (Diagnosed with astigmatism)


-Ophthalmologist (Assured me nothing wrong with eyes)


 


I have NEVER taken LSD/ACID


 


& maybe this has a correlation as to why my symptoms are not as bad as other people having hppd?


I'd say compared to some things I have read on this board, my symptoms are definitely lighter than others. 


 


??????


Does this sound like a typical case of HPPD and nothing else?


I really wonder sometimes if there could be something else wrong with me. I've never had a brain scan or mri but is it really necessary?


What else could it all be? 


 


Thanks!


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I described it up top a bit, but I feel as if this forum gets more traffic? 

My other post here got deleted I believe, probably cause it was a repost, but I'd wanted this topic in here and have been trying to remove the other one but can't figure it out.

 

I'm really concerned with my symptoms, like most people with HPPD, and just wanted advice with my specific situation. 

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