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Fully recovered... Just a quick update...


ziggy

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Hi peeps, some of you may remember I was posting on here about a year ago.. Last post was probably 6 months ago now..

In my last post I said that "it" had started to decline and I was feeling ALOT better, not really noticing anything on a day to day basis..

So for those who dont know, I had serious HPPD for about 2 years following a lifetime of recreational drug use not to go into to much detail..

Had many symptoms, flares in my vision, movement, colidascope mesh type shit.. paranoia, etc etc... Very dark time... Nothing I would of acted upon but almost suicidal moments... "Oh my god I have fucked the rest of my life" was generally my first waking thought...

So, basically I know the drill...

Reading through these posts on here and the support people gave me really helped and I wanted to post some news on how things have changed... Basically im am FULLY recovered... Im sorry to say I cant give any definitive conclusion on how this came to be...

But as I mentioned in my last post meditation was VERY helpful to me and I still practice it daily.

On the whole I am glad I lived through the experience.. It was terrible at the time, I remember that, but the strange thing is I cant really remember how I felt when I had it really badly... I can but its like a bad dentist experience.. You remember it was unpleasant but you dont actually remember the pain..

What I would say is it made me wiser, and calmer, and made me appreciate the the fragile nature of the mind... BUT most importantly it reminded me YOU NEVER KNOW WHAT LIES AHEAD....

If someone could have told me, 2 years from now you will be chilling blazing a big spliff and all that will be a distant memory I would of been fine but alot of the suffering i endured was worry.... "I am going to go completely insane" " will it ever stop"....

I know many have not been as lucky as me and I feel for them greatly, but dont ever think you can not recover.. Because you can!!!!!!!!!!

Many reports I read said if it last more than a few months you will have it for life etc etc... Well thats not true either... At least not in my case...

So to conclude... All those suffering I hope this brings you some hope and inspiration...

As I said I dont know what aided my recovery.. But, the things I did do which I feel helped, were MEDITATION!!! Very helpful....Also.... Adrenaline!!!! I do track days and motor sports and I remember even when it was at it worst I never had any symptoms while racing... So... Maybe... The natural endorphins and concentration and adrenaline are beneficial... I know not every one can go racing but some kind of extreme sport or anything that gets you adrenaline going and makes you happy.. Other thing is lay off the weed... I do smoke again now but I stopped for the best part of 2 years and I wish I had not started again, not because it brings on symptoms but just because stopping made me realize how much time i spent on the x box smoking weed eating crisps.. But hey....

Oh and this also helped...Ignore the silly video, just the song.... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2vW867TrVHA

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The most I've ever felt in control was when I practiced meditation to beat hppd. Real life, stress, work make it hard to do it daily but I remember it helped tremendously.

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Thank you for posting this! I don't think that this is a life long condition for anyone.

I for one have almost beaten the psychological part of hppd, mostly. No dp-dr (except for when i watch documentaries about outer space and russia and other things that makes you feel small and pointless in comparisio) almost no anxiety, only stress and caffeine-related.

I guess if you just hang in there, you can beat it! And now i'm off for a few beers :)

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