Sparkierflame24

No idea if it’s safe or not but please let us know how it goes.

So after all of this stuff started happening to me in may after I was taking doxycycline mono 100mg for my acne which then resulted in a panic attack. I’ve been thinking and flipping back and forth between whether or not this is HPPD or my anxiety. I was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder, last month I spoke to an HPPD expert and here’s what he said “Thank you for your response. It´s difficult to give a diagnose without talking to each other in person. However, apparently you're suffering from different types of severe anxiety, associated with perceptual phenomena. HPPD in a more narrow sense of the word is usually strictly visual phenomenon, whereas perceptual problems associated with anxiety could also present DPDR, i.e., depersonalization / derealisation syndrome (with or without additional HPPD symptoms).“ and I’ll admit, I have used ChatGPT to gain a better understanding of my symptoms and each time it has said it’s unlikely that I do have it and all of this is tied to my anxiety disorder. I’m taking it with a grain of salt of course but it has told me this more than 15 times. Also I have not taken drugs since last year and ever since this started if you check my earlier posts then you’ll see the symptoms I had. Now I’ve never heard of someone getting new symptoms when not taking drugs anymore but with me i noticed that motion blur seems more pronounced to me. It’s not like I see tracers or afterimages (multiple hands when I wave my hand for example) but it’s just the motion blur is more noticeable to me. I could just be hyper focused on it. also thanks to Jay1 as he’s replied to my posts and I’ve seen him comment on other posts about hppd so yeah, thanks man, you’ve been very reassuring and helpful for all of this.

So it’s been over a month since I had my first panic attack due to my acne medication which also has left me with anxiety. I know for a fact I got health anxiety due to the fact I’ve been jumping from self-diagnosis to self-diagnosis but the thing I can’t shake is what if I have HPPD. The last time I took any drugs was last summer and since then I stopped taking them forever and never looked back since, drugs were never really for me anyway and I didn’t abuse them either. Only smoked weed about 10-12 times in total over the span of 3 years and took 1.5 grams of penis envy mushrooms once for my first and only time which led to an extremely bad trip. Now I mentioned that was basically last year so, after a panic attack that I had last month (might have been my 3rd or 4th) that’s when I noticed that when I stare and zone out I notice objects breathing or distorting almost but here’s the weird thing, this started a year later and again I never abused drugs like that, this only started happening after my anxiety started which again was because of my medication. So now I’m flip flopping back and forth whether I have HPPD or not because there have been 2 instances where I didn’t experience the whole breathing effect for a week straight and there are moments when I check for it and it doesn’t happen. I’m positive this is just my anxiety only because of the timing of everything but you know how anxiety is and how it’ll make you doubt and second guess everything. The only thing I have to know for sure is if I have HPPD or not as it’s the only thing my anxiety has been anchored to right now because everything else that was brought up with anxiety like death and depersonalization I’ve gotten over. Ever since I took those shrooms I’ve regretted it and never thought about taking drugs again but I’m scared of the fact that this one little mistake has ultimately changed my life forever. if you want more details about what’s going on you can check out the only other post on my account, thanks.

Yeah I’m definitely taking it easy now, again I have not touched any kind of drug since July of last year except for the doxycycline which was prescribed to me by my dermatologist, do you think this will go away after I’ve treated my anxiety and overcome my panic disorder? Another person I’ve spoken too said there’s a good chance it will, that’s if I do in fact have hppd that is.

I’m scared I might have it Hey, I’m afraid I might have hppd because the last few days stuff I’ve been staring at looks like it’s been breathing, I haven’t touched ANY drugs since I tried shrooms once last year and had a very very bad trip, it should be important to note that I have anxiety right now because of medication that I was taking that caused anxiety attacks as a side effect which I also stopped taking after the first attack. I also want to add a few more details so I can get a better idea if I do have it or if I’m just stressing out. I took 1.5 grams of Penis Envy (which my friend told me it’s essentially double dosed so it’d be closer to 3?) which the trip lasted 8 hours and it was very bad, it made me really aggressive and paranoid during the whole thing, keep in mind this was my one and ONLY time using psychedelics. I barely smoked any weed before that and haven’t touched any drugs at all since as mentioned above. I was taking doxycycline mono 100mg for my acne and about a week or two ago it caused a panic attack so I’ve been dealing with anxiety since and I also stopped using it after that happened. I have visual snow but that’s definitely because of how much time I spend on screens. I did have depersonalization after my trip but I don’t anymore, at least not as bad as I used to. I don’t see flashes of light or color, double vision, any geometric hallucinations, I just see stuff moving like it’s breathing in my peripheral and floaters but that’s normal for me, I don’t experience any auditory hallucinations either, I’m just worried about the breathing part lol. It only happens if I stare at stuff for a bit, I’ve heard it’s normal but I’m paranoid so who knows. I spend A LOT of time on screens and barely used to sleep but I don’t feel exhausted so this could just be visual hallucinations because of those but I’m working on that now. I’ve also noticed a loss in appetite too. This all could just be my anxiety and how it’s looking for something to stress me out but I just have to make sure because ever since I took those shrooms it’s been my biggest regret in life. Also sorry if I keep updating this, this is a new thing for me and my anxiety is really not helping, I’m getting a psychiatrist and a therapist pretty soon so I hope they’ll help me with this. If there are any questions about anything else please ask me, I’m really scared I have this condition and I just want an answer from people that know about it. I’ve had someone tell me maybe I do or maybe I don’t but either way it sounds pretty mild and I should just stay sober and take it easy which I will. UPDATE: I was just diagnosed with Panic disorder (episodic paroxysmal anxiety) and found out that it’s more likely that it’s caused by that and not HPPD but still if any info or opinion would be appreciated. Another update: I took melatonin only last night to help me sleep because I have been struggling (it said for the serving size it’s 10mg but that’s for 2 gummies and I only take one so it’d be more like 5mg) and maybe I’m just paranoid, maybe it’s because I finally got good sleep, or maybe it is what I think it is and I woke up and colors looked a bit more vibrant, it’s probably because I’m just hyper vigilant due to anxiety but I don’t know I’ve heard melatonin isn’t exactly bad for hppd but don’t get me wrong I’m not using melatonin to treat it either, I just took it one time to see if I’d sleep or not, don’t plan on it again. UPDATE (7/18/2023): So I’ve been seeing a therapist and a psychiatrist for a while and turns out I don’t in fact have panic disorder I actually have Generalized anxiety disorder, I always questioned it because out of all the times I’ve had panic attacks, only one happened out of nowhere. I’ve been panic attack free since the 27th of June and that was because I was looking up symptoms and scared myself. I’m still unsure of whether or not this is hppd as more symptoms showed up and I’ve still been drug free, so this could be anxiety as I’ve never heard of someone with HPPD getting more symptoms on top of their old ones.