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Cantsee120

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Everything posted by Cantsee120

  1. My HPPD began last August after some adverse interactions between PCP and anxiety medication I was taking every few hours. Symptoms have definitely improved wirh time after living the sober life for a few months but after beginning to drink and party weekly the symptoms stopped improving at a steady pace and some got worse. My main issues are widespread numbness, foggy mind, and most importantly, distorted depth perception where the world/my surroundings/my own body appear small and far away which drives me nuts as anyone could imagine. Im now giving antipsychotics another shot since some side effecte were too proninent when I tried them almost a year ago. Ive noticed any substances that increase dopamine production/levels make my numbness and depth petception distortions worse for a day or a few days after, plus my psychiatrist recommended a specitif dopamine antagonist ot "dopamine blocker which are commonly known as antipsychotics. In my case my psychiatrist whos dealt with a patient with PCP related issues had used Risperidone on that patient with success so tecommended it for me so thats what im trying aagin. Im just attempting to try this coutse of trratment again this week so I know itll take some time to imptove my symptoms if it does, my biggedt concern is that itll make my syptoms worse but I gotta try something. Ive also decided to stop any recreational substance abuse all together because that was most beneficial to my rercovery initially. If anyome has been in a similar situation Id greatly appreciate any input/advice because it sucks living like this and I I share the pain of everyone whos part of this community. Any info that may lead me in the right direction is all ai can ask. I know that for each chemical reaction in the brain/body there is a counter interaction that will block or reverse the effects, its just finding the right medication or substance that comes between us and returning to a normal wau of life. They've found a drug to counteract opiates like heroin to save lives and block the effecte, theres got to be a way to do the same with hallucinogens. Thanks everyone
  2. After years of psychedelic and disassociative use I had no negative lasting effects. I used PCP (Phencyclidime) for the first time at the end of 2018 after my mom suddenly passed away whem I was only 21. I did it a dozen times over about a 1 week period with no lasting effects and stopped after wantimg to improve my life. I began taking Gabapentin daily for hortoble chronic anxiety to help cope with the grief and began taking it 4 times a day (once before bed) for about a year before I emded up with the nastalgic urge to do PCP again. My Gabapentin levels must have been extremely high due to the frequent, long term dosing and heavy dependence on the substance. After only smoking about 3 hits worth I felt it enough for that specific situation (keep in mind it was tje same stuff from the same guy, and my friend who did it with me had no lasting effects) When I got hoke less than an hoit oater I took my 600mg dose of gabapentin and didnt come down any more that day, i took it again a few hours later before bed and woke up still very intoxicated and numb. Not realisimg an adverse reaction between the two substancrs was the cause of my prolomged effects, I took another 600mg gabapentin 4 times that day and everyday for another 10 days. I was becoming increasimgly concerned and distressed that the effects hadnt dimimished whatsoever, so I decided something had to change and abruptly weened off gaba over 3 days and faced the horrific opiate-like withdrawls. Slowly but surely I began to feel more sane and less numb over the past 11 months but even today my depth perception is significantly smaller than it should be (Micropsia/Alice in Wonderland Syndrome) and everythimg/everyome looks smaller and farther away than they used to be, along with distorted/diminished sense of touch and a delay in my visiom by a fratiom of a second and trailing, especially behind movimg lights. This experience scared me out of my cruious patty lifrstyle, I used to smoke marijuana everyday all day and drimk almost daily. I completely stopped drinkimg for 3 months immediately after the onset of symptoms and was afraid of smoking marijuana because it makea it all worse. I sadly began drinkimg alot about 4 montgs ago when ai got impatoemt and hopeless of recovery and im sure its not helping my symptoms imptove furthe, but it dosent intensify them ltke marijuana does. I stopped again recently. Ive been on Lexapro (SSRai) for 4 years and didnt stop takimg it during all of this until recently weening off but I had to get badk om it due to weening hastily and improperly after gettimg terrifyimg withdrawl effects like shortness of breath that got worse over time and frequsnf chest tightness with frequent irregular heartbeats. I think my symptoms actually improved when I discontinurd the SSRI. My psychiatrist said hes treated someone with mental issues related to PCP abuse with a second genetation antipsychotic called Risperidone so he put me on it. Sadly I stopped it after less than a week because it ended up making my hesrt pound from very light physical activity like just standing up, im sure that was due to the usual SSRai-antipsychltoc interactions so im waotong until im Lexapro free to try it again. I honestly think it helped because I started to feel less out of touch with reality and while on it I felt less numb, ive also read the other day that the antipsychotic Latuda reverses the cognatove impairment of Phencyclidine (PCP) which I want to l9oo in to. Ive tried benzodiazapines recently whicj didnt help my maim symptoms, same with CBD. One last importamt detail is that I did use cocaine from month 3 to month 6 because it made me feel more grounded and mentally "there" and less disassociated so I began doing i6 frequemtly (stupid I know) BJT one negative eggect it had was that it made me percieve objects as EVEN SMALLER which is my main disorienting symptom, and if cocaine mainly has a strong effect on dopamine then maybe all my shrumkem perception is due to dopamine dysregulation/PCPs effect oj my D2 receptors. if thats the case then maybe some antipsychotic dopamime antagonism is really what I need to reduce my symptoms. If anyone has any relation to my situation or any helpful imput Id greatly appreciate any of it.
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