mcmz12

So I live in the united states and decided that i wanted a hair transplant in turkey because its so much cheaper there. Before the hair transplant 35 days ago i was great very mild depression, good concentration, depersonalization and derealization was like at 30% out of 100% hppd lowered lights didnt beam out at me and i worked out 4 days a week very strong no physical weakness. I THOUGHT I GOT USED TO THIS HELL BUT SYMPTOMS GOT WAY BETTER AND I DIDNT NOTICE THAT I ACTUALLY RECOVERED UNTIL I RELAPSED! IVE HAD THIS FOR ALMOST 3 YEARS! Anyways after my hair transplant in turkey at first i thought my exhaustion and physical symptoms was jet lag or the time change. Weeks passed still felt exhausted everyday. I noticed my vision is way more depersonalized like it might even be more depersonalized when this hell started 3 years ago im also suffering from severe depression AGAIN! ALL LIGHTS ARE SO YELLOW IN ROOMS AND CAR LIGHTS ARE CRAZY CRAZY BRIGHT! MY CONCENTRATION IS ASS anyways for the procedure they gave me local anaesthesia so that i was awake during procedure, sedation in the blood stream which relaxs you literally almost instantly they numbed my head. After procedure they gave me steroids pills to take for 5 days for head swelling and 5 days of antibiotics! WHAT DO YOU THINK COULD HAVE MADE ME RELAPSE? HOW CAN I GO BACK TO BASELINE? UGH IM SO SAD THAT ITS LOOKING LIKE I HAVE TO SLOWLY RECOVER AGAIN AND IT TOOK A LONG ASS TIME OF HELL.

My heart feels so heavy I can't stop crying I've had this for 5 monthes the head pressure hurts so bad the nose pressure hurts so bad the anxiety makes me shake I get muscle spasms all the time the depersonalization not being in my body is crazy my eyes can't even look around normally it's as if when I look left or right or up or down with my eyes it's like they see in steps they just don't look around normally my heart is so broken my ears have titinitus and hearing loss I don't feel like my cars on the ground when I'm driving idk how to explain it im so broken I'm 24 years old I just started doing molly I have never done any other drug besides smoke weed this year only because I started going to music festivals this year my friend convinced me too all the people who do way more drugs then me at these music festivals are fine:( I did like 12 Molly's in 5 monthes time I love sports I can't play basketball because my eyes are so messed up I'm 24 years old it was time to start growing up I can't believe this happened to me:( I had so many goals I had so many ideas all for a little fun man shattered too my loving parents and two little sisters I'm sorry for letting you down:( I hung out with people who've done drugs for years none of this happened to them I had no warning never in my life did I think I would wish to be normal?? sorry for the grammar I just don't care at this point

People take pure mdma for ptsd? How would you know the difference if you took pure mdma or someone gave you something with a research chemical in it or some shit

Okay so I rolled extremely hard one night heart was pounding dipped in a lot of people's bag anyways my heart was pounding and they all said it was molly but anyways could tons of molly cause extreme light sensitivy? What other drugs could cause that's like powder form maybe the red monkey I took?

The way I got my hppd and dp/dr was sudden panic attack sharp pain in head then vision changed two days after taking molly I have problems with concentration and focus I really can't focus with my eyes when I look at the sky and see a plane I can't focus on it while it moves when I saw two people on americas got talent dancing hand in hand I couldn't focus on the overall performance when I went to the airport to drop off my dads mom there was a lot of people and to see everyone I have too look left right left right one could only focus on person at a time couldn't just see everyone like a normal person does some guy rode his bike by me I tried to watch him with my eyes and I couldn't follow had to keep moving my eyes to see him when I look left or right it's like I don't process visual information fast enough like it's a slide show or some shit just not natural this all brain damage? When I drive and see the car in front of me it's like i see it but I can't focus on it when a kid was dancing by himself on americas got talent I can either see his upper body or lower body I couldn't focus on just him dancing what is this

No now I just have 24/7 head pressure

Sooo when you look left to right you see things in steps? When you see 2 people holding hands it's like I can only see one person at a time one thing at a time just looking around is the worst

No I can't take it all in

Anyone?:(

So I'm watching americas got talent and there's a women and a man dancing together and I noticed I just can't keep up I look at her then him then her then him I can't look at the overall dance then a boy danced himself and I could only focus on his head or his body not his overall body like wtf is this it's like when I look around I'm switching scenes instead of natural motion it makes me feel like I can't function what is this? Also got visual snow dp/dr light sensitivity floaters physical problems you know