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Exsces

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  1. Sob! Nice to hear that! I really dont know if smoking weed is gonna make things worse for me, I actully thinking its all mental, when I forget about it I dont see or feel weird at all. But I kinda can open it up in my mind and then I just feel weird. And I dream a lot about weed and in my dreams its allways nice to be high but I just have this ptsd because smoking while my bad trip really wasnt cool haha I hope I can smoke someday again
  2. I took a few hits of weed a month after my hppd kicked. It was a mild hppd not so extreme as other people on the forum have it, Ive only tripped two times and the first time it wasnt even enough to make me have visual effects. The second time bad trip. boom hppd I also kept smoking a little at first but I noticed it made everything just so much worse so I quit everything, even coffe(coffee made me see thing go all fast like on extasy or something).Well after a month it got slightly better and I wanted to see what weed would do to me.. Really bad panic attack. I was so freaked out I didnt even notice my hppd. Now I can say I have recovered to 95 % I only get the visuals if I remeber them or loock for them, the anxiety went away thanks to akkupunture. I just feel you know like as if I woke up from a coma. Its like I want my social skills back and all the time ive lost smoking pot in my room. And I know I will and you guys can to never give up! And I hope when this is like reaaaaally in the past like in 6 years of no hppd symptom all happy and new life and stuff, I wonder if it would kick in again if I hit a spliff in a mellow happy and funny surrounding. Because comon who does not miss the feeling of being high with your buddy! But I believe no one wants to be the 24/7 stoner anymore Sadly I dont think nobody who has been recovered for a few years is gonna be here on this forum
  3. Totally agree with Kyle! I think we all have that feeling that we failed to our parents for doing this drugs and alot of us have been thinking things like we messed up our brain or something, and itmakes you feel guilty. Thats why you have to atleast consider telling them. You may think about it first, there are parents and PARENTS you know... In my case my mom still smokes a small amount of weed in the evening so she took it pretty cool. On the other hand my father who has been a MAJOR drug user really like everything there is from anphetamin to heroin to aaah I dont know he always told me about his bad trips he had at my age and when I told him he almost went crazy telling me things like AAAh Ive told you so meany times why did you have to touch the fire I told you its hot.. You really should like check your situation. Not every parent is the same, and I tell you when I told my mom I cried for a few days, I even sleeped in her bed (with sleeping I mean staying awake the whole night sleeping 2 hours in a row) It was so helpfull to have her know. And well my father actuallyhelped me too because he had the experience... He actually had a waaaay stronger bad trip than I had. He had the typical three days in a row from one too strong acid trip day and night on and on... So inmy opinion, if you see your parents kicking you out of the house because they dont know how to handle the situation make something up like your sick or that you had a very traumatic event in your life.. maybe with love or something..like somebody just broke your heart into pieces and your suffering from major anxiety and depression. Just make sure you can stay with them as long as you recover. It doesnt take that long if you follow the basic rules Happy rehab!
  4. Hey there people! Im not gonna go into a lot of details since we all know how this is, some of us have it more others less.. but I just had to give you my experience.. Sooo.. Ive been (like probably the most of you) for 5 years a heavy pot smoker, every day non stop the good stuff and VERY strong hash. I tripped the first time in my life with a friend who I did not see in long time and he had this few LSD blotters. I did not took a lot so I didnt even get visual effects from it, I just laughed a lot. So a year after, to be exact the 24 of december 2013 he came back again and we kinda wanted to do the same thing. Only this time he had waaay more blotters with him and 2 different kinds. And not forget to mention it was the damn 24 of dec, we both had to eat like dinner with our familys and stuff, but you know I rolled up a spliff in the morning and didnt even think about the consequences.He kinda had tolerance build up over the weeks he was taking that shit, but I was like still a noob to LSD and I took WAAAY too much like one dose of EACH(bycicle and the crazy einstein thing).. This led on to the most stressfull experience of my life...The typical Bad Trip, like a nightmare were you know its real, feeling like in a lord of the ring movie...smoking weed on the way to town.. of course this time I had major hallucinations...Suddenly my anxiety kicked in, I felt like on crack or something really bad feeling. So I know I said I would make it short but this is kind of a relief for me I kinda made it through the day and when I came back home I took theweirdest shower of my life and kinda felt "safe". The next days were weird, I knew smoething had changed but I mostly was happy that this nightmare was gone. I said to my self daaaamn I guess im still coming down but nahaa!! after 3 days I started with the anxiety and I dont know if that may be a major factor in hppd but what really made it like extremely bad was my first attempt to know what was happening... I googled: LSD bad trip anxiety....... THAT SCARED THE SHIT OUT OF ME I became the most paranoid and even a bit psychotic person in the world after searching stuff on the net.. people who killed themselves, people who never cameback or are in some institutions blah blah blah. So what I did was talk to my mother, she helped me quitting smoking weed and cigs ( that was VERY tough, I could not sleep nor eat for like a week)I even stopped doing coffee. I was very scared because after 2 weeks I still felt trippy and dreamy and cloudy and the whole package. Then I came up with a GOOD information. HPPD and PTSD. once I knew what was going on the crazy switch went to inteligence. I got my mind back, and that just after 4 weeks. I still had some MAJOR flashbacks and the symptoms of HPPD lasted for as long as 4 months or so(now talking in present) I had this dreamy sensation of DP DR but what really anoyed me was my hyperattention, everything that moved in my peripheral vision would get immediately focused and the letters on my computer would start moving to the left and to the right. But I convinced myself that it was all mental. Today I can say I have recovered to 95 percent. And my suggestion to you is try to understand what is happening to you. I would describe HPPD like an optic illusion, once your brain seed it it cannot unsee it. Remember long ago before the first hallucinogen experience? I always tried to imagine what it would be like tripping, but I couldnt. Now that you can every time you think about it is like telling your brain do it! Every time I remember the letters moving back and forth while reading something they start doing it. Its all in you head! If I relax my vision I can make things wave around like a curtain but only if I concentrate. The derealisation fades away the more happier you are and somebody on the first page said it, a healthy body is a healthy mind.That is totally true. You just have to learn to live with your past, you cannot avoid it, you cant undo it. I know HPPD is really bad, and I dont even wanna try to imagine what it might be to live with it for a year like many hear have... you have my greatest respekt! I remmeber having a fight with my father a few weeks ago, and went outside to a walk just you know.. to walk the anger away and I ended up having this feeling Im like very tall SCARY or watching a building while walking and seeing how the perception got different and my brain jusy though im tripping! Its all about teaching your brain to be normal again..Nobody here is fucked up for live like we use to think. You decide wether your happy or depressed. And always look on the brigth side, when all this is a few years in the past you wont even remember you were here writing all paranoid and sleep deprived on a forum. I guess thats why there are not so many 100 procent recovery tories, they just dont care anymore. So to conclude I want to apologize for my bad englisch, Im actually from south spain OLÉ! Here a few tipps I totally recomend: -Stop drugs (like of course but no really, I tried a few hits of weed and it was terrible, maybe like in 10 years I may try it but not until the time hasnt completely made it) -No psychiatrist,if they dont know with what they are dealing with they will just give you antidepresiva. Instead try akkupuntur,I did also yoga which actually made me trip a little sometimes but its worth a try. -Akkupunkture is really helpfull, tell the him/her to ground you and to balance your ying and yang, it made me feel a lot more confident and helped me come back. -Try different diets, like vegetables, nut cocktails, try maybe indian food. See what makes you feel better, I usually got very sleepy after eating pork meat or fried stuff. Whatever works best for you. -I know that in the USA its very common to take vitamins since you can like buy it everywhere like candy, but I dont recomend that. Eat some fruit for breakfast, thats the healthiest thing you can do. I love Kiwis and oranges and bananas, really after 20 days or so you wont even think about what you gonna have for breakfast you just gonna go and take it. -Sometimes its hard to deal with all the bad things that happened to us, I got pretty hurt in my childhood because I used to fell in love and get friendzoned really hard and that would bring me down while I was on HPPD. So here is something that makes wonders, try google psych-K. That is the ultimate form of connecting to your subconscious and reprogramming your brain, it made miracles in one 2 hour session. Its literally telling a therapist what makes you feel bad and then you just vanish it like magic. Its actually very deep psychology. I think its called kineosology and the science skepticals are kinda against it because they dont know how the uncouncious and the brain works so they cant really prove it jet but really it WORKS. PSYCH-K (made up from psych key, the key to the psych) google it look up if theres somebody who practices it near your town. If you do it you will thank me -Exercise as much as your body allows you to, dont sit the whole day in front of the tv or the computer, thas just gonna give you tension in your back and make you fat -Change your looks, get a new haircut or color, buy some clothes and everytime you look in the mirror just force yourself to smile. Smiling is the most important thing. You know this dog who enters a room full of mirrors and starts barking, and since they dont recognice themselves on reflections he saw a lot of angry barking dogs.. The other one entered the room swinging his tail. Thats you when you look in the mirror wiht the typical Fuck my life look(I used to have it too) stop feeding you depression. -The only suplements I would suggest is detox stuff like artichoke extract or something, artichoke cleans your liver, look up for things like that, you wanna clean your liver, your kidneys and maybe even lose some fat. I recomend sauna. -And the last tip I have for you is dont take your life so seriously, its not like you gonna get out alive from it... I apologice again for stating at the top I didnt wanted to go into details but you know once you get started hahaha PEACE Happy rehab!
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