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gobigorgohome

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gobigorgohome last won the day on April 11 2013

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About gobigorgohome

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  • Birthday 08/15/1988

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  1. I think when you're first hit with HPPD it's totally understandable to give yourself a little "break"--to take time off, to be seen if you want to, to rest and eat well and do a bit of research and find support so that you can understand and get your feet underneath you. After that, I think it's best to live! If that means taking maybe one less class, do so. That's perfectly understandable. Take three classes a semester instead of four. It will feel so good to stick in it, and use that extra time to do art, to take yoga classes, to be with friends, to work--don't use it to sit around
  2. Hey all- Thought I'd come back on for a hot sec to let you all know how things have been. Brief synopsis of my tale (which of course, is quite similar to many of yours.) I took LSD Aug 2011 and was hit full on with HPPD a couple months later. Before and after I was smoking, drinking, with MDMA thrown in once every couple of months. I'm 24 and female (one of the few, it seems!) My visual symptoms are apparently minimal- I've got static snow, and things move and breath a bit (I like to sing "I'm on a boat, motherfucker!" to myself whenever I notice this, because it honest to God f
  3. I couldn't get a prescription for Keppra, but was prescribed lamictal instead. Are they similar, do you know?
  4. I know! It was such a frustrating experience. All she said was, "We know Keppra can have nasty side effects, so won't be prescribing it." AKA, "Although this may help you, we need to protect ourselves first, even though you are telling us you are in a safe environment where side effects will be monitored." So yeah, sweet. I have another appointment end of the month- I set up appointments back to back in case the first psychiatrist isn't interested in giving it a trial. What these people seem to be missing is that despite my current quality of life, I'm am not suicidal, and if some med
  5. (And yeah, I'm trying to get a prescription for Keppra, the 'wonder drug' around here at the moment! But I went to a neuro today and they gave me the run around- told me I needed to be seen by a psych. Great.)
  6. Hmmm...does the Neuro PS really help? One of those supplements I could see people pushing at finals time to earn an extra buck . But if it works for you, I'll take your word for it!
  7. Awesome, Boogres, glad to hear it! I had a long awaited appointment with a neuro today- brought my big stack of papers to push for keppra, and they basically said I needed to go to psychiatrist instead. Pushes me back another month until I'm seen. But with all of the positive keppra trials, trying to keep my head up. Keep us posted, good luck!
  8. Hey all- So, finally starting to be seen. My most annoying/troubling symptoms have to do with my working memory/recall/general ability to think clearly (brain fog). Pre-HPPD, I was a bit of an annoyingly focused student; currently, I have trouble following through with even the simplest of tasks (especially anything requiring abstract thinking or sustained focus). Lower than normal energy levels certainly don't help. Got some neuro-pychological testing done recently, and am eagerly awaiting the results. Some tests were freakishly easy (when it came to noticing minute differences in visua
  9. Hurray for HPPD online. I hope any new sufferers find this site IMMEDIATELY so they can get right on track to coping/recovery.
  10. Better memory and recall...that sounds like a dream! Still trying to get in to be seen. Just got some neuro-pychological testing done- will be curious to see what the results are. I plan on going on keppra/meds, and then re-testing, so can see if actually helps with the cognitive dysfunction. Good luck! Keep us posted!
  11. Eh, just got off my first phone call trying to schedule an appointment to be seen. Incredibly painful. After explaining/describing the situation: "...So you want to be checked into our drug rehabilitation/ substance abuse program?" "No, no, I'm not addicted and I don't abuse drugs. Never have. I mean, I've used drugs, but only a handful of times, and I was never addicted or anything..." Irritated silence. "Okay, so you're hallucinating?" "No, like I said before, it's not hallucinations...just visual disturbances. I repeat, I do not have, and have never had delusions or symptoms of py
  12. (sorry, know nothing about that vendor, just wanted to get a shot of the book cover- here it is just on it's own: http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/41eEIqbM9PL._SL500_AA300_.jpg)
  13. Short-term memory problems are the most frustrating for me, along with delayed/messed up verbal recall. DPDR suck too. I have come to peace with the snow. I'm not crazy about the closed eyed visuals, but if they are here to stay, I can live with those as well (or at least become very good at ignoring them.) As with the impending feeling of doom/dread- that's anxiety. I know the feeling because I had anxiety/those feelings looooong before I ever even had HPPD, even long before I started drinking/experimenting with drugs. It's cascading adrenaline, and while it feels 'dangerous' or like 'ma
  14. That's shit your doctors can't help you out, Sammy. I think we definitely have a problem with over prescribing here in the U.S., but for stuff like this, there needs to be more support. Might be a while before I can try it myself- have to figure out insurance, find a doc, etc. In those who have tried it, how long did it take for side effects to mellow out? Definitely have a history with depression, so do not want to aggravate that (obviously that's an issue right now, due to my current quality of life). What I am really seeking relief from our the cognitive problems (short-term memory, pr
  15. Ah, Blue Moon is the best! Anyway, I think I used to have a bit of social anxiety. Definitely had generalized anxiety growing up, and this filtered into my social interactions. Truth is, you're still very young. In my early twenties I just naturally became a bit more genuinely confident, comfortable in my own skin. Even in the bowels of HPPD despair, I still have the tools I gradually learned to handle social situations. Maybe just give it a bit of time, don't be too hard on yourself (as in, going over everything you did after a social encounter. Say, "That was a good practice run!" a
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