To give you some background I've had hppd since around 2009 after taking a large dose of mushrooms( 5 grams or more). Prior to this I smoked weed frequently, drank, and had tripped 5 or so times. The initial trip was fine with some ups and downs nothing too traumatic, but afterwords I could definitely tell something was off. After the comedown my symptoms continued to get worse over several months, ranging from full blown trips to static, visual distortions, Dp/Dr, depression, and anxiety. From here my life was pretty much shattered I lost my job, girlfriend, dropped out of school, and had to go live with my parents.
After that first year my symptoms started to improve. I was able to get a job and moved out for a while. Over the next couple of years I continued working and no longer saw objects moving and my overall head was in a better place(still had visual snow and dp/dr). During this time I only drank alcohol, which helped with some of the symptoms. I quit my job few years later due to too much anxiety, but at that point none of the other symptoms were nearly as bad. Anyway to shorten the story I've had a few jobs since then and most of my symptoms are completely gone and have been for several years. The only symptoms I have left is occasional visual snow(only if I look for it), mild dp/dr, and anxiety, but its not constant like it used to be. I'm at the point where none of these problems really bother me. I pretty much feel like I don't have hppd anymore and haven't had any major episodes in several years. My problem is though I still don't feel like myself.
I was wondering if anyone out there has had a similar situation where they are pretty much symptom free and have took MDMA years later and were OK. I want to try a normal dose but not sure if its worth the risk. To add I have done some drugs over the past couple of years but none have added or worsened any of my symptoms. Just made me feel bad while i was on it. I'm not doing this for the high, I'm hoping to clear up some mental problems that have been bothering me.
Sorry for the long post. Any advice or response would be appreciated, thanks.