Long story short I made a thread on here about a yr ago about having hppd...and how I got it. In the post I mentioned how I was drinking alcohol and smoking weed pretty much everyday ( I've had hppd for 2 yrs now)
Now Fast forward to about 6 months ago I was browsing through these forums and I was reading something on here (cant exactly remember) about someone having some symptoms and explained their hppd got worse after smoking weed. Now A couple weeks later one night I drink a couple beers, smoke a bowl fall asleep and wake up with exact symptoms! I believe it was patterned vision and after images...
Now even though its been 6 months I still try to figure out did I subconsciously somehow worry myself into seeing these things? Or is it just coincidence and it really did get worse?? I mean I could be in denial because I definitely do have the symptoms.. but Im wondering had I not read about em would I even be seeing em? It sounds crazy... but with the way this whole shit has gone.. I dont know what to think anymore lol..
And referring to the title of my post... I pretty much have every symptom in the book... constant DR, patterns on the walls, shaking edges, my brain kinda "glitching" when I turn my head like something moved when it didnt, noise (even though I dont see it unless I look for it), after images, seeing white swirly things when I stare into a blue sky long enough, and Im sure some more things Im forgetting right now... all this 24/7...
Im just thankful that I've been through alot in my life that made me strong and have dealt with depression 10 yrs... and as soon as I was pretty much over it...... BAM!!!!! I get this bullshit. But I refuse to let it break me because I just look at it as another obstacle in my life that I have to deal with.
Anyway... even with all this.. as stupid as it sounds I still feel the need to smoke weed. Like I said in my first post I got this stupid shit cause I accidentally smoked a laced blunt. I've never done any other kind of drugs in my life. And Im kinda pissed off cause all I wanna do is go back to smoking my weed to relax... but then again Im kinda tired of having to readjust to all these new symptoms.
I guess this is just a question for the older folks that have been dealing with this for some years and took the same approach Im taking... is there ever an end to new symptoms?? Like once u get em all, u just learn to deal with em and it cant get any worse?? Or do new symptoms just keep popping up until you really cant function
Sorry for the long winded post.. but Id just like some input from people that have dealt with this.. cause trying to explain it to my friends got em looking at me like Im psycho lol.
Thanks in advance.
Oh and to any kids that are new to hppd reading this..... STAY AWAY FROM MARIJUANA!! You could smoke constantly day and night and be fine.. but all it takes is just that ONE time to make your symptoms permanently worse... believe me.. you dont wanna end up like me lol (seriously)