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RPK

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Everything posted by RPK

  1. im thinking about blindfolding myself for 1 or 2 months to try and get rid of visual symptoms and basically reset my brain. do you think this will have an effect on my hppd? will it make it better? im just so tired of everything looking like a cartoony animation.
  2. drinking alcohol is definitely playing with fire imo. no matter how bad your hppd is, alcohol can creep up on you later and bite you in the ass even if you're only having a small amount every so often. baring in mind i have mild hppd, i would usually go out once or twice a week and have no more than 4 cans as im quite a light weight. but this would never have a permanent affect on my symptoms untill last friday when i was out and got drunk off my usual amount not going past my limit as i have read that hangovers can cause full blown hppd. had work the next the morning so i only got around 3 hours sleep and i was pretty dehydrated. got to around 11 am and i was having a dpdr attack/ bad anxiety and everything was just really weird, i was working at a festival and this was the first time i had ever got a flashback when sober. ive decided to completely cut out alcohol completely cos i honestly do think it makes hppd worse, sadly it took me 5 months to realise this and im now left with increased vs symptons
  3. funnily enough i found out from my dad that my uncle was schitz a few months back and it does make you wonder whether it runs in the family. as far as schizophrenia goes for me, being a club stupidly taking a bomb of md knowing that i have mild hppd, left me with geometric patterns everywhere and crazy closed eye visuals. everything was pretty under control untill i went outside and smoked a spliff which brought on a full blown schizophrenic attack, not knowing that this zoot would completely tip me over the edge, it triggered a flash back that led me straight back to the first lsd trip i had that gave me HPPD and being in that club where literally everyone is out to get you, looking round at groups ofpeople discussing my thoughts and behaviour, in strange voices that can only be described as shit scary is by far the most horrifying experience ive ever had to go through, never mind the fact that everyone looked completely animated and cartoon like and the club turned into a hellish place where i pretty much struggled to find the exit. but yeah i thought i'd share how far a flash back goes for me and knowing that i have these schizophrenic assets now installed in my brain but its honestly the least of my worries. im more concerned about this shitty visual snow that makes everything look like complete and utter shite. if only this disorder had an expiry date and my brain would reset back to normal
  4. ah ok yeahh dude i'd take zukov's advice and just try and stay off this website for a while, stay positive and do literally anything that will take your mind off it. best of luck man
  5. why are you worried about becoming schizophrenic if you dont mind me asking? did your trip that caused the onset of your hppd involve a schitz attack? just wondering cause im sort of on the same boat of you in a sense that in my 'bad trip' that gave me this disorder was basically me having a crazy attack but since my onset i havent had any flashbacks that lead to me having another one apart from this one fucked up night i had on md at a club, was honestly the scariest night of my life and totally put me off all drugs. hope you get better soon man, thankfully ive only got mild hppd but by the sounds of it you've got it pretty badly
  6. yeah mann well i have mild visuals, and when this first happened to me i woke up and went in to my bathroom, turned the light on to find patterns all over the walls. the nightmare triggered it for me, i wont even go into detail of the dream, scares the shit outta me!
  7. thats the best way to describe it for me, everything looks really vibrant and for me very cartoony, i didnt realise this was a symptom for dp/dr, as my visuals are quite mild and i dont suffer from any real anxiety, but when i do have a full on flash back, for me its like having a schizophrenic attack where literally everyone is out to get me, that on top of everything looking like a cartoon/animation, its just really weird
  8. i dont know about 2D vision as my visuals are pretty mild, but since the onset of my hppd, all my surroundings look fully 3D, that on top of the all the colours being alot more vibrant and the distortion of shapes, everything just looks completely soft and animated. i agree with nuroeone when he says everything looks like an image rather than something you can pass through, its as if im seeing my life through a motion picture
  9. yeah my dreams have been pretty fucked up since my onset of hppd, i experience sleep paralysis i'd say twice a month and its honestly made me dreading going to sleep sometimes, but i also have nightmares where i am having a full on flash back, hallucinating in a dream? and its scary as fuck. when i wake up my symptoms are twice as worse and i avoid going to bright light cos thats when the patterns start to appear.
  10. yeah ive experienced sleep paralysis 3 times since the onset of my hppd and it is by far the most uncomfortable feeling you can have not being able to move your whole body when you're mind is still half awake. it usually happens when im waking up from a nightmare and im becoming conscious but my body sort of drifts back into the dream and your basically left feeling fully paralyzed, i had it pretty bad not being able to move for about 10 minutes, im hoping to god this doesnt happen to me again
  11. does anyone know if laughing gass affects their hppd?
  12. yeah the microdot i took comes in the form of a tiny little red dot and i was also told it was the equivalent to 5 or 6 tabs, shouldn't really have jumped so far on my third time of taking lsd. but i forgot to add that when dropped it, i placed it underneath my tongue and the inside of my mouth has also never felt right ever since, but yeah i can actually trip myself out by simply pressing my tongue down in certain spots of my mouth, for example flicking that little bit of flesh underneath my tongue or putting preasure on the bit in the middle of my front teeth. its quite hard to describe the actual body trip i have inside of my mouth buts its really weird and i try not to test myself, although i have done it a few times in college. do you know anyone else with this little side affect to hppd? i've already cut down drastically on the weed as ive noticed its definitely making my symptoms worse but it does get really hard sometimes to turn down draw especially when most of my mates smoke, giving up the md and ket doesn't bother me to much. i was also wondering if actually paying attention to the visuals makes it worse, as i do find it very hard not to. thanks to everyone for commenting back, much appreciated
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