mybiggestmistake

pretty straightforward question.

i have tried lamictal too and it didn't do much for me besides even me out a little. i was never too happy or too depressed on it, i was just indifferent and empty. i quit it along with all my other meds so i could learn to cope with my depression naturally without the use of medication. a while after that i got heavy into psychedelics and got my HPPD. i still have terrible anxiety, paranoia, panic attacks, and visuals. the only drug that seems to help is alprazolam. ive never been prescribed it, but i buy xanax off my friend sometimes when i start having a panic attack or if im tripping too hard and its a borderline bad trip. i really wish i could get a prescription for it but im 18.

probably anxiety and visuals. ill only get dp/dr episodes every once in a while, but ive had those as long as i can remember, even before the drugs.

i get relaxed when i smoke, not trippy. ive never had any problems with anxiety or paranoia when im high. i smoke primarily to relieve anxiety. but i guess chronic use has made my anxiety worse. i have noticed that my visuals get a little worse when im high though. i agree, the reduction is social anxiety that beer gives me outweighs the dizziness and hangovers. but when all else fails, bust out the alprazolam. i wish a was alive when queludes were still in existence haha!

wow, i hope to be as successful as you all some day. thanks for the encouragement and inspiration, you have no idea how much better i feel. so is weed really that bad? can it exasperate my HPPD? if stopping it will help me, i am all for it. but damn is it gonna be hard haha, seeing as im a self medicating psychonaut. also, is getting drunk every now and then that bad? if so i plan to cut back on that too. im not a heavy drinker but i like to pound some brews with my buddies every once and a while.

i wont bore you with the story you have probably read a million times, but basically i now have HPPD from taking large amounts of benadryl and DXM. i have realized that the more i freak out about it, the worse my visuals get so im trying to just chill and forget about it. but its hard because i have terrible anxiety and paranoia. what are some tools or skills i can use to combat my anxiety? (aside from medication) i feel so alone in this struggle and im wondering what i should do from here. should i see a doctor or a psychiatrist or something? im telling my parents soon but im not really worried about that. i have stopped taking all drugs besides weed. im attending college and trying to make a positive change in my life, but i feel as though my HPPD is holding me back a little. also, i am very glad to have found this website. i had no idea this condition existed and that other people had it. thanks for any answers you may have.